Mysticism, Ghosts and Such

[gratitude28]

Do your Ns have some "different" beliefs? My mother comes up with stories (and has since we were children) about ghosts and other mystical experiences. Lately she talks about it even more. She believes when she sees her mother in a dream that she is telling her something. A piece of jewelry she bought lately she has decided has "bad vibes" and she needs to get it out of the house. She had a masseuse who told her she felt that she had been abused at some time and my mother went ballistic. She only believes in mystical stuff if it is of her OWN creation. Anyone else's perceptions are whacked and sick and they are "stupid people."
I read in one of the Narcissicm descriptions that this is a trait of Ns (childish imagination including only what they want to believe???)
I'm not knocking anyone who has beliefs here. I just see that my mother's are very unbalanced as she will believe in her own ghosts, but anyone else's are the product of an unfit mind...
Beth

[teartracks]

Beth,

A version of what you are talking about is Magical Thinking.  It's not a good thing, but lots of people do it.

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magical_thinking

Maybe this link will give you some understanding.

tt

[Lily_]

Hi Beth,
My Ndad has been obsessed with the paranormal, psychic phenomena, etc., as long as I can remember - despite him being a practicing Roman Catholic (as devout as an N can be...).  He claims to this day to be able to read minds, have out-of-body experiences, prophetic dreams - stuff like that.  He's always been big on pretending he has clairvoyant abilities and would use his parlour tricks to manipulate and scare me as a kid - another horrible control tactic.  A lot of good or bad situations in his life are often attributed to so-called feelings or vibes he's had, when they're just normal parts of life for the rest of us.   Dad always claims to have known everything before it happens, but always conveniently states it after the fact.  His favorite line?  "I didn't want to tell you but..."

It's just another way for him to be "special".

Funny thing though, he's not a big fan of my husband.  One time when dad had a few too many, he started going on about his abilities and hubby called him out on it.  Dad tried a few tricks and my DH didn't bite and instead laughed at him.  Ever since then, dad keeps saying how much more he liked my (gullable) ex.

Mom's another story altogether... 

-Lily

[SilverLining]

Hi Beth,
My Ndad has been obsessed with the paranormal, psychic phenomena, etc., as long as I can remember - despite him being a practicing Roman Catholic (as devout as an N can be...).  He claims to this day to be able to read minds, have out-of-body experiences, prophetic dreams - stuff like that.  He's always been big on pretending he has clairvoyant abilities and would use his parlour tricks to manipulate and scare me as a kid - another horrible control tactic.  A lot of good or bad situations in his life are often attributed to so-called feelings or vibes he's had, when they're just normal parts of life for the rest of us.   Dad always claims to have known everything before it happens, but always conveniently states it after the fact.  His favorite line?  "I didn't want to tell you but..."

Interesting.  My N-ish/asperger father goes out on the same kind of psychological limb, except it is AGAINST everything paranormal, spiritual, psychological, e.t.c..  His obsession is science.    And by God everything he believes is scientific and rational while everything everybody else believes is emotional and superstitious. 

It's a different path but it seems to me they end up in the same place.  It's a way of feeling special and degrading everybody else.   

[moonlight52]

Welcome tjr100 ,

Stephen Hawking and Albert Einstein are two examples of scientists well also both were physicists that loved science but also
have a deep reverence for a higher power and GOD .
Maybe it not the subject of interest science ,art , literature or architecture maybe anything would do for him just to be right .
Maybe being right all the time is the obsession and any interest would do.

hugs,

MoonLight

[mum]

Maybe being right all the time is the obsession and any interest would do.

BINGO, Moonlight. For my exNidiot....a beer's country of origin, baby words he made up, foods he would/would not eat...ANY interest...doesn't matter. Mr. Entitlement's opinion is the only one that matters!!! Everyone elses' is incomprehensible to him, and everyone else who possibly has another opinion must be punished for their transgressions of stupidity!

Heaven help all of us who cross an N on their golden path!!! (of ghost talk, beer loves, sport obsessions, etc., etc....)

[moonlight52]

MUM ,

It is all about control.

Can another person really control another well I suppose if the other person is unaware which I was as a child .
But once you realize what the game is there are so many ways to remove fear and  live a happy life.
I believe that has to do with one's outlook on life.
And finally seeing that your life is your own and only you have the power to make it good.

Heaven help all of us who cross an N on their golden path!!! 

Well I have chosen another path .

MoonLight

[gratitude28]

All, I think you streamlined the idea...

To me, it is impossible to pin down what my parents do and don't like since each new situation seems to bring about new criticisms. What is beautiful one day can be ugly the next. A stupid person can become smart... if they somehow please them...

So odd. How do you not realize that people are people and make mistakes and grow and change and can be distinct individuals. It is sad, because the Ns are truly scared little people.

[moonlight52]

Beth ,

For me I am fine when I am on my own.I do want to understand what happened in my FOO .
So I come here to learn.I know very well with interaction I will not do well.That is the way it is now .
But as I grow and learn even more it may not always be that way.
Everyone's situation is different.I want to learn and be responsible for my own feelings.
Beth you told me when I was in the middle of my bipolar meltdown (and it was true and kind)
"Moon, Try and see yourself separate from him"

That was great advice that's what I am doing and I am feeling the gladness of owning my life.

Thank you Beth

Moon

[ANewSheriff]

Beth,

This is pretty interesting.  I have not really heard or seen this before, but it makes sense.  If someone with NPD wanted to really "one up"  his family or peers, what better way than to elaborate on his psychic knowledge and power - knowledge and power that are unique to him?

ANS

 

[gratitude28]

True, I never thought of it that way.
You know, when my mother started sharing these tidbits with me, I used to think maybe she was scared I would scorn her. Now I think she has trepidation because they are her "special secrets" and she doesn't think I am worthy of them or some strange thing. Hard to pin down. Boy, the mind of an N is interesting.
Thanks ANS!

[teartracks]

Beth,

This one zoomed right by me when I first read your initial post (not that things zooming past me is unusual), but what the others are saying makes so much sense.  Well, another thing to put in my bag of 'good sense'.  Thanks.

tt

[Certain Hope]

Dear Beth,

  I was this way: each new situation seems to bring about new criticisms. What is beautiful one day can be ugly the next

  I was ignorant. My mother raised me, after all.

Humbling experiences brought me to examine my ways of thinking and viewing others. Empathy allowed me to look beneath the exterior of people and see them for more than just how they impacted me personally.

Some folks just never grow up or wise up.

Love,
Hope

[gratitude28]

((((((((((moon)))))))))))))

Thank you for the kind words.
Love, Beth

[Hopalong]

Some Ns I've known subtly ascribe mystical powers or unusual perceptiveness to themselves.

My subtle response is I wanna barf.

 

Hops