love to you too Moon.
Well I'm calm again. Guess I really do have mood swings...!
Some work fell through, didn't mind too much, didn't much care for the place but I was going to give it another try.
Job today went well. One of the patients was really agitated just as I was leaving, smashing things, went back and talked to her. I seem to have a knack of calming people down- maybe having bipolar has given me an insight into agitation. There's a technique of neutrality too which I learned years ago in social work- don't provoke people more by giving them the wrong responses when you don't know what's going on; with the alzheimers the person themself doesn't know usually either nor will they always remember in a few minutes. If you can get them calmer they often just forget the whole incident, it's important to address the emotion not necessarily the issue.
Spent short time with son, ex was nice but when I am concentrating on what he says it's still quite N. Son ignores him, is a bit scathing with him sometimes. I find myself feeling a little bit shrinking away from the things he says, and pouncing on son when he sounds that way.
It's very subtle, I don't think anyone except us would notice it much now, they'd think he was being charming and funny, which he is.
But he definitely feels slighted by other people's achievements and there's a slight 'put down' element with a lot of what he says. Course that's very much my culture too- slight passive aggression behind the politeness and charm.
He likes it when I am anxious and needy, I am going to work hard on not showing him that side of me, it triggers his Nism.
I've lost 4 more pounds- slow steady downward progression now. Enjoying that
Tonight is a concert I really wanted to hear but I am so glad I didn't pend the $40-60 on a ticket, with delightful synchronicity they are doing a free master-class for choir directors which I'm going to tomorrow instead.
Talking of synchronicity, a new friend told me this week: 'synchronicity is G-d's way of remaining anonymous!'
