Whoami,
My feeling is that n's need to be fed from the outside in, because they cannot feed themselves from the inside out. The inside is so damaged, that they cannot face it or access it, in order to heal it. No true healing can come from what is attained from the outside.
Most of us certainly appreciate being acknowledged for our accomplishments, being told we look good--especially when we've made an extra effort, or praised for a job well done. But, we don't live for it and die without it. We can gratify ourselves because the inside is whole and complete. If the inside is not healthy in those of us who are not n, we will want to and are able to seek help and actually make progress toward improving that situation.
N's cannot do that because they cannot dig to their core and heal the damage. They will just continue to feed from the outside in, trying to fill the bucket of their soul. But the bucket has a hole and the feed keeps leaking out and continues to need refilling. They cannot seal the hole. That would mean facing the pain which created it in the first place. Over time, they have learned that it is easier to ignore the inside and just keep feeding from the outside.
We can all be so grateful that we are not them.
Brigid
