Sea,
I am so sorry that things are so difficult for you right now. It is all such a shock. I think you shut down when things are so bad with the N and it is as if the filters allow the reality in once they are gone. It is such a crime and a crime committeed by one you loved and trusted. I know the loneliness, getting on here has kept me going at times when I was so lost.
i do wish it was easier for all of us. All we can do is stick at it, stay here for each other and keep posting. I have been in relationships that have ended but there was none of this terrible loss. I was able to work things out in some way with others, ease each other in the seperation but none of that can be available with an N. Any contact is an opportunity for vengence and pain. We are trying to crawl away from a way.
Be soft and easy with yourself.
lots of love,
axa
