Thanks, Hops and Deb. I'm trying to turn the tape off by visualizing how much better things will be away from her poison.
Last night my son told me she told him that once we leave, there's no going back. That was a horrible, hateful thing to say to a child, but I turned that into a positive. Once we leave, there is no going back to that. I won't want to. We'll be in our own place where there'll be no yelling, no screaming, not back-biting. We can work on being strong, centered people. We can work on being positive and using positive incentives to help ourselves.
I don't want to cry in front of my mom though, because she'll use that against me. That would be proof that I can't handle this, and I don't want her to think that I can't.
After all, she thinks I'm taking my son out of a stable home environment. But I thought a stable home environment meant that the kids were happy and loved, not that they lived in constant fear of how someone will react because they wear sandals to walk the dog. My son even tells me that she asks questions when she thinks he and I are having a private discussion. It's crazy-making. It's insane. I shouldn't have to worry about having a private, personal conversation with my child. Because one night we had a discussion about something totally unrelated to moving, and then she pumped him for moving information.
She's basically told him that once we move, she won't love him anymore.