Author Topic: The soulless people  (Read 1672 times)

axa

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The soulless people
« on: June 22, 2007, 04:35:23 PM »
Today I met a my SIL who has been out of the country for a year.  She asked me about Xn.  Told her about him and her response was "He is one of the soulless people"  Her friend is married to an N and she has observed him over the years.  It was incredible to meet someone in real life who knew the truth.  Everything I said she would say, I know this is the truth I have seen that covert violence and abuse for myself.  I hugged her so much and felt so validated.  She talked about someone being so broken and twisted yet so able to fool the world......... it was like music to my ears. 

She agreed he would never do anything overtly violent to me "that she said would be too real" but she is concerned from her experience that he is not gone.  Funny, she said the only way to deal with them is no contact.

Feeling validated somewhere else besides here.

axa

Overcomer as guest

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Re: The soulless people
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2007, 04:48:44 PM »
Hello, Axa:  It is SOOOO wonderful to have someone understand you and validate you...

I have had two real Ns in my life.  My ex husband and my nmom.  They are two different types of Ns.  My xh was one of those "soulless people."  He would do things without any respect for consequences...if he wanted to do it, he did and didn't even worry about it until later.  It has gotten him into so much trouble, but he just doesn't seem to learn from his mistakes.

My nmom, on the other hand, is just an egomaniac.  It's not that she doesn't have a soul, it is just that everything she does is self serving.  So if she hurts someone else, that doesn't matter if she has an agenda and that person gets in the way.  So in a way, I guess she doesn't have a "soul."  Or she just sucks at empathy.  I know she has chosen other people's feelings over mine hundreds of times.  She is the Queen of Betrayal!!  (one for the Dahhhhhrrrrlings thread!)

Hopalong

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Re: The soulless people
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2007, 09:17:03 PM »
Wow. Axa, that is wonderful.
3-D validation is just stunning.

Keep looking! There are more out there!

I'm so happy about this for you...  :D

Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

lighter

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Re: The soulless people
« Reply #3 on: June 23, 2007, 09:10:53 PM »
So glad you experienced that support and validation, Axa. 

WRITE

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Re: The soulless people
« Reply #4 on: June 25, 2007, 12:59:51 AM »
good for you Axa.
Sometimes it feels crazy-making just to know most people don't see what we are seeing.....great to have some real-life confirmation.

sea storm

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Re: The soulless people
« Reply #5 on: June 25, 2007, 01:29:57 AM »
Dear Axa,

What a relief and reinforcement for your reality. A reality that was so distorted for so long by your X.  I hope it brings you peace.

Sea storm

axa

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Re: The soulless people
« Reply #6 on: June 25, 2007, 01:28:40 PM »
Seastorm,

How are you doing

axa