Kayleb's Mom, you ended up stuck with a sociopath for an evaluator, and thank God your lawyer didn't let her get away with her misrepresentations, and thank God the judge saw through them.
I've just bought Martha Stout's book "The Sociopath Next Door", and in it she talks about what reasonably bright, but not brilliant, sociopaths do.
She says:
[Imagine yourself as this type of sociopath. Here is what you'd be like:] "... As this sort of person, you ensconce yourself in a niche, or maybe a series of niches, in which you can have some amount of control over small numbers of people. These situations satisfy a little of your desire for power, although you are chronically aggravated at not having more. ... Sometimes you fall into sulky, rageful moods caused by a frustration that no one but you understands.
"But you do enjoy jobs that afford you a certain unsupervised control over a few individuals or small groups, preferably people and groups who are relatively helpless or in some way vulnerable. You are a teacher or a psychotherapist, a divorce lawyer or ... a consultant of some kind, or ... a human services director.
"Whatever your job, you manipulate and bully the people who are under your thumb, as often and as outrageously as you can without getting fired or held accountable. You do this for its own sake, even when it serves no purpose except to give you a thrill. Making people jump means you have power - or this is the way you see it - and bullying provides you with an adrenaline rush. It is fun.
"... Most invigorating of all is to bring down people who are smarter or more accomplished than you, or perhaps classier, more attractive or popular or morally admirable. This is not only good fun; it is existential vengeance. And without a conscience, it is amazingly easy to do. You quietly lie to the boss or to the boss's boss, cry some crocodile tears, or sabotage a coworker's project; or gaslight a patient (or a child), bait people with promises, or provide a little misinformation that will never be traced back to you."
You're a devoted mother, working hard on recovery, trying your best to protect yourself and your child from an abusive N. You make this lady look like the shabby little fraud she is, just by standing next to her and breathing in and out. And she knows it, and she was doing her level best to punish you for it, oh-so-sweet voice, batting eyelashes, and all.
Thank God the judge saw through this. Thank God your lawyer had the presence of mind to bring up all the relevant stuff that this creature was pushing off to one side.
