Hi Changing,
Boy, I know how you feel about being isolated. I'm on Worker's Comp. Have been since Nov. of last year. My husband is a truck driver & is only home 3 or 4 days a month. Our kids are all grown & don't live very close. I'm all alone day in & day out. I do get to see my grandbabies about once a month or so. I did have some people working on my house today. I think I kinda freaked them out because I kept talking to them. Just to get some sort of human contact. I finally made myself shut up & retreated back inside. I have no family in this state & even if I did, the only one I'm close to his my aunt. But we only talk usually by email, due to the cost.
I've been a loner all my life. I just don't have it in me to build & sustain a close relationship. I do have one friend. She's a lot older than me, so we don't get together very often.
BUT, the good news is that I'm really trying to learn to deal with this. Since I put a name to what was wrong with my mother, I've been alot better. Finding out that it was her, not me, was a major breakthrough. You know, Changing, the really weird thing for me is that if you were to see me at Wal-Mart, you would never know. I put on a really good show when I am forced to be out in the world. Doctor's appts, grocery shopping, seeing neighbors out in the yard, ect.
Nobody knows the real me. Well, my husband does. He really is great. Before you congradulate me, I went through a REALLY bad marriage with an NHusband, just like you. I managed to get out with a few clothes, no money & certainly no dignity. So, I hope this does not sound like a worthless platitude, but if I can find a great guy (don't ask me how I did it) you can to.
Love,
Bigalspal