Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
BonesMS:
--- Quote from: Certain Hope on August 26, 2007, 10:46:43 AM ---Ahh.. Bones! So in all of this assuming, we have more than just obliviousness to other people as individuals, we have a grand sense of entitlement! Sorry, I'm slow in connecting dots, but eventually I get it (sometimes :?)... guess I tend to think of these people who seem so "out of it" as being dissociated, as opposed to N.
So basically, everyone - including her own husband - is just a tool to be used in the advancement of her own plans and schemes.
My mother has planned European trips and not told my dad for many, many months, until well beyond the point when the money deposit became non-refundable. She manages their finances and assumes that because her aptitude for this aspect of their marriage exceeds his, then correspondingly, so does her entitlement to make decisions. Basically, anyone involved with such a person is simply along for the ride.
That is so sad.
Love,
Hope
--- End quote ---
Thanks, Hope, and that is so right!
Bones
BonesMS:
During my Sunday shift, I decided to play it smart and turned my cellphone completely off so that it wouldn't ring while I was covering the crisis lines. Turned out that my shift was REALLY BUSY with the phones just ringing off the hook! Toward the end of my shift, when things slowed down, I checked my e-mail, again, to see if I had received my new shift schedule for this coming week. (I had checked my e-mail right before leaving home and coming to work.) What do I find? TWO e-mails from said "friend" because she STILL ASSUMED that I was available to talk with her at HER CONVENIENCE!!! This is AFTER I had been telling her for a month, now, that I CANNOT chit-chat while I am working covering crisis phone calls! I ignored them and deleted them! (What part of the word "NO" does she NOT UNDERSTAND???? :roll: :?
Bones
Certain Hope:
--- Quote from: BonesMS on August 27, 2007, 08:58:34 AM ---During my Sunday shift, I decided to play it smart and turned my cellphone completely off so that it wouldn't ring while I was covering the crisis lines. Turned out that my shift was REALLY BUSY with the phones just ringing off the hook! Toward the end of my shift, when things slowed down, I checked my e-mail to see if I had received my new shift schedule for this coming week. What do I find? TWO e-mails from said "friend" because she STILL ASSUMED that I was available to talk with her at HER CONVENIENCE!!! This is AFTER I had been telling her for a month, now, that I CANNOT chit-chat while I am working covering crisis phone calls! I ignored them and deleted them! (What part of the word "NO" does she NOT UNDERSTAND???? :roll: :?
Bones
--- End quote ---
Man, this does give a new depth of meaning to the word "oblivious"!
It'll be interesting to see how long she continues this pursuit, Bones. You definitely seem to be an integral part of her ritual.
You know what? That's how I'm coming to view these weekly letters from my parents... just part of their ritual. They always write them on Sundays, after church... as though that's when they feel particularly good about themselves and can really put a nice gloss on it all.
Bones, 6 1/2 years of weekly letters... and I don't respond. The thing that really gets me is that they've never once asked WHY I don't respond.
I wonder whether your "friend" will ever ask... but I doubt it.
Love,
Hope
BonesMS:
--- Quote from: Certain Hope on August 27, 2007, 09:08:45 AM ---
--- Quote from: BonesMS on August 27, 2007, 08:58:34 AM ---During my Sunday shift, I decided to play it smart and turned my cellphone completely off so that it wouldn't ring while I was covering the crisis lines. Turned out that my shift was REALLY BUSY with the phones just ringing off the hook! Toward the end of my shift, when things slowed down, I checked my e-mail to see if I had received my new shift schedule for this coming week. What do I find? TWO e-mails from said "friend" because she STILL ASSUMED that I was available to talk with her at HER CONVENIENCE!!! This is AFTER I had been telling her for a month, now, that I CANNOT chit-chat while I am working covering crisis phone calls! I ignored them and deleted them! (What part of the word "NO" does she NOT UNDERSTAND???? :roll: :?
Bones
--- End quote ---
Man, this does give a new depth of meaning to the word "oblivious"!
It'll be interesting to see how long she continues this pursuit, Bones. You definitely seem to be an integral part of her ritual.
You know what? That's how I'm coming to view these weekly letters from my parents... just part of their ritual. They always write them on Sundays, after church... as though that's when they feel particularly good about themselves and can really put a nice gloss on it all.
Bones, 6 1/2 years of weekly letters... and I don't respond. The thing that really gets me is that they've never once asked WHY I don't respond.
I wonder whether your "friend" will ever ask... but I doubt it.
Love,
Hope
--- End quote ---
I think her being oblivious is just the tip of the iceberg with her. It's gotten to the point that every time I encounter another example of her mindlessness and acting oblivious that I think of a Gallagher video where he had this huge character stumbling around with his head stuck up his you-know-what!
Bones
BonesMS:
I do plan to give a birthday card to her mother for her 90th birthday this week.
Bones
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