Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?

[BonesMS]

I'm sitting here feeling absolutely horrified and sick!!!  The news just announced that a GRANDMOTHER has been arrested for deliberating throwing her 2-year-old GRANDBABY several stories to the pavement from a parking garage walkway!!!!

WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

[Hopalong]

Oh, Bones.

There is so much madness and cruelty. Our culture is in terrible crisis.

I think you need some sweet, heart-healing fiction.

love,

Hops

[BonesMS]

Oh, Bones.

There is so much madness and cruelty. Our culture is in terrible crisis.

I think you need some sweet, heart-healing fiction.

love,

Hops

Thanks, Hops.

For something like this to happen during the Christmas season is just heart-rending!  It just doesn't make sense!

Bones

[sKePTiKal]

Hey Bones... it doesn't make sense at any time of year!

I believe that there are just as many good, kind, heartwarming stories out there - of people helping each other - as there are horror stories; it's just that the media believe that horror stories get better ratings (they don't KNOW; they haven't tried the other kind or reporting...).

When this stuff starts to get to me, I will find a way to "join the other team" and try to make someone's day, or help someone out, or even just make a harried, Christmas season cashier laugh. (Point for the good guys!) Oh yeah... and I don't read the paper that day or watch the news! It's sort of like the telephone - I really don't have an obligation to answer it, if it rings; and I don't have to subject myself all the time to the negative reporting, the sky is falling, the world is going to hell in a handbasket attitude that now passes for "information" either.

Hops! Do you still have a link to the "Good News Network" online? Are they still around?

[BonesMS]

Hey Bones... it doesn't make sense at any time of year!

I believe that there are just as many good, kind, heartwarming stories out there - of people helping each other - as there are horror stories; it's just that the media believe that horror stories get better ratings (they don't KNOW; they haven't tried the other kind or reporting...).

When this stuff starts to get to me, I will find a way to "join the other team" and try to make someone's day, or help someone out, or even just make a harried, Christmas season cashier laugh. (Point for the good guys!) Oh yeah... and I don't read the paper that day or watch the news! It's sort of like the telephone - I really don't have an obligation to answer it, if it rings; and I don't have to subject myself all the time to the negative reporting, the sky is falling, the world is going to hell in a handbasket attitude that now passes for "information" either.

Hops! Do you still have a link to the "Good News Network" online? Are they still around?

Thanks, P.R.

[sKePTiKal]

But, you are right - this one is pretty weird, Bones. I just read about it in the paper yesterday.

Apparently, while walking with other relatives, "grandma's" brain took a serious turn south... and while they watched, she just picked up the child and threw her off a pedestrian walkway. Like she just snapped... right now, they're not sure what the reason for the action was... and there was no mention of mental illness or anything else to explain it. And Grandma's not talking.

I wonder how much stuff like this happened at the same frequency it does now - only the "news" never got out of the immediate neighborhood? I also wonder, if I really NEED to know everything that's going on in other states, other countries, around the world? I mean, if I'm drowning in "information" does it really make me more "informed"? I know that after the saturation point, it sure doesn't make me smarter!

[Hopalong]

http://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/about-us.html

And some favorite print publications (they're also online):

ODE: The Magazine for Intelligent Optimists
The Sun Magazine
UTNE Reader
E! The Environment Magazine
Green American

I can always find out something to feel positive and excited about in these.

xo
Hops

[sKePTiKal]

Thank'ee Hops!

[BonesMS]

But, you are right - this one is pretty weird, Bones. I just read about it in the paper yesterday.

Apparently, while walking with other relatives, "grandma's" brain took a serious turn south... and while they watched, she just picked up the child and threw her off a pedestrian walkway. Like she just snapped... right now, they're not sure what the reason for the action was... and there was no mention of mental illness or anything else to explain it. And Grandma's not talking.

I wonder how much stuff like this happened at the same frequency it does now - only the "news" never got out of the immediate neighborhood? I also wonder, if I really NEED to know everything that's going on in other states, other countries, around the world? I mean, if I'm drowning in "information" does it really make me more "informed"? I know that after the saturation point, it sure doesn't make me smarter!

I understand.

Now the TV news is mentioning that this grandmother may have a mental illness.  God only knows!

Bones

[BonesMS]

 

[BonesMS]

After yesterday's support group, I have begun to think that maybe I am expecting too much from a support group.  With all the issues I am struggling with, a support group may not be enough.  A support group is not the same as group therapy.

[BonesMS]

This may be my Asperger's again...some things just CONFUSE the h*ll out of me!

It's that time of year where people are hustling and bustling, buying all kinds of holiday stuff for Hannukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, etc. and many purchases include the following DREADED words on the boxes.....ASSEMBLY REQUIRED.

For me, common sense tells me that when the box says "ASSEMBLY REQUIRED", the box will include WRITTEN DIRECTIONS on HOW TO PUT IT TOGETHER!  Furthermore, common sense tells me that one READS the WRITTEN DIRECTIONS BEFORE BEGINNING ASSEMBLY.

Yesterday, the committee that I am on went out and purchased an artificial Christmas tree which includes lights already on it.  I had to run home and get something and when I came back within less than five minutes, the other members of the committee had the tree components out of the box, scattered every which way, were trying to force pieces together and complaining that nothing was going right.  I asked where are the written directions for assembly.  One of the members pointed to a table on the far side of the room!  I walk over to, said, table and discover that the directions are STILL INSIDE THE UNOPENED SHRINKWRAP!!!!  NOBODY BOTHERED TO GET THEM OUT AND LOOK AT THEM!!!!!

I opened the directions, brought them back over to the group and had to repeat myself, several times, before anyone heard me, that maybe we SHOULD READ THE INSTRUCTIONS FIRST BEFORE ATTEMPTING ASSEMBLY.  Nobody heard me at first because they kept talking over each other and complaining that the tree was not going together right!  I ended up having to shout to get their attention.  When I stated, again, that maybe we SHOULD READ THE INSTRUCTIONS FIRST, the response I got was:  "We don't need to read the instructions!  This assembly should be self-explanatory!"  (HUH?!?!?!?!?)  I pointed out their own comments that the tree was NOT going together right and that MAYBE we should look at the instructions.  I've often heard the phrase, "If all else fails, FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS".  The committee asked me to read the instructions to them while they went through Step 1, Step 2, etc.  Within seconds, one of the committee members announces that the instructions are WRONG because they don't make sense to HER!  (All this WITHOUT reviewing the directions FIRST!)  Her husband suggested going back to the beginning and taking the components back down to the first one.  She didn't want to do that because she had started putting on the decorations!!!!   

Finally, the committee started READING the instructions for themselves, took down what they had already done, and FOLLOWED THE DIRECTIONS!!!  The tree is now assembled and the lights work!  (People are confusing!   )

[Guest]

Bones
I guess the moral of the tale is: don't allow a committee to put up a Christmas tree!

People are confusing? Not in that instance. They are just plain stupid. With bells and lights on!

well done

[BonesMS]

Bones
I guess the moral of the tale is: don't allow a committee to put up a Christmas tree!

People are confusing? Not in that instance. They are just plain stupid. With bells and lights on!

well done

 

Thanks, Guest!

[Hopalong]

OT, but I really, really enjoyed asking the nice moving man when he was here packing:
Would you mind just wrapping up that Xmas tree and all those decorations? He said sure!

I kept a tiny (10") fake tree I actually like, had bought it for my Mom's breakfast table, and my one favorite ornament with my D's baby photo that she'd made in preschool. And the door wreath.

Otherwise, the tree, star, ornamants, garlands for balcony and mantel, cinnamon wreaths and bows I made, outside netting lights I'd put on the bushes, and the garlands and bows for the lamppost--all packed for my brother.

Who accused me (among his other adorable things, in a 8-page document) of "Not allowing my mother to celebrate Christmas".) ???????????  I created Xmas for her every single year. Took her to lovely feasts with close neighbors/friends who invited us year after year, took her shopping while she could and helped her order things after she couldn't, wrapped and mailed her presents, got her presents, put on the music, made the potpourri, took her to Xmas Eve services...typed her holiday letter, helped her do her cards.

And he actually put that on his "list" of "abuses". The tiny spark he had was, my D does not do Xmas. I raised her UU and she had the choice. (She'd always visit her grandmother and me for a week sometime near then.) So because NMom always complained pitifully to my brother, when she'd call him, that there wasn't enough Xmas (she wanted full-tilt Norman Rockwell and it wasn't available, I could not recreate a big extended family for her and my brother's family rarely came) ... he took that tiny spark (my D not participating) and painted me with the same brush, when it bore no relation to reality at all.

I just really, really enjoyed the idea of him opening box after box after box of all the Xmas stuff I used to make a peaceful, pleasant, reliable and musical Xmas for our mother year after year.

(Not that he'd turn a hair about all the lies he told. I'm sure it didn't really trouble him a bit. But it was fun for me anyway.) And I love having that tiny tree with 2 ornaments and 1 door wreath, it feels so nice. That and the great music.

Hops