Why didn't we become Ns, why did they become Ns?
Both suffer similar privations very early on. I don't know if this is anywhere near but it seems to me that one major difference is what we - and they - did with shame. We took it right in and developed toxic shame; we were bad. They rejected all shaming and project it outwards; it's the external world that's wrong, not me. They remain the centre of the universe, with needs that can never be filled; we are too aware of others for our own health and need to carve our own space. I guess we became adept at meeting others' needs while they were trapped never getting over wanting everything to fill them. We have our own N traits and anyone can monitor their own. They can't do that because they don't have anything else to compare with. I have no idea why I'm writing this. I guess maybe I thought someone wanted to know what I think. Would that be N? Or just reading the signs and following the roadmap.
Hope that contributes PR.
Thanks, Freshwater.
Having studied psychology, I do have a few theories about why they became NPD's and we didn't.
I tend to view human behaviors on a spectrum. Each of us do have a little bit of Narcissism in us. It's called HEALTHY Narcissism as it's part of our survival mechanism. To get a bit Freudian....there's the Id, Ego, and Super-Ego:
http://psychology.about.com/od/theoriesofpersonality/a/personalityelem.htm; with us, the Super-Ego acts as sort of a gate-keeper...keeping things in check so that our Id's and Ego's don't run buck-wild.
However, with the NPD's, there is no "gate-keeper" in control to keep their behaviors in check. I believe that they are on the Sociopathic/Psychopathic Spectrum. Their Id's are out of control, their Ego's are VERY AWARE of the reality of what they are doing BUT THEY JUST DON'T CARE! I think the only thing that stops them from committing murder, like Ted Bundy, is that they are VERY AWARE of the legal consequences of criminal activity. Unfortunately, there are those on the far end of that spectrum that managed to initially get away with murder but, sooner or later, they will do something incredibly stupid and the law WILL catch up with them! That is small solace to the survivors of their victims.
Why do some people become NPD's or Psychopaths/Sociopaths could involve either physical brain damage somewhere along the way and/or brain chemical imbalances. The one frontier, here at home, that is still VERY UNKNOWN, is the functions and physiology of the human brain.
I think I'll step down from the soap-box for now.
Bones
