Author Topic: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?  (Read 1305224 times)

BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4740 on: August 03, 2013, 07:16:06 AM »
http://www.creators.com/advice/annies-mailbox/empty-fretter.html

Regarding the letter about the Bachelorette Party....it is just me or have the advice columnists missed the point that the Maid of Honor is UNDER 21 and is NOT legally allowed to drink alcohol ANYWHERE?!?!?!?!  So what is the point of making an obscenely expensive road trip?

 :?
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Hopalong

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"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4742 on: August 03, 2013, 12:44:04 PM »
for you ((((((((Bones)))))))

http://www.upworthy.com/some-geek-boys-called-these-geek-girls-fake-they-certainly-wont-be-making-that-mistake-again-7?c=fea

 :P
Hops

LIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   :D

I wonder how many people spotted Wil Wheaton in there supporting us GEEK GALS?   :D

I've been a GEEK as long as I can remember, a TREKKIE since 1966, and PROUD OF IT!!!!  If I get the chance to attend a Star Trek Convention, I go in my Star Fleet Science Uniform!!!  I'm trying to save up to add to my TREK costumes, DVD'S and toys!  If some FAKE guys don't like that, DEAL WITH IT!!!  I'm at an age where I tell people:  "What you see is what you get!"
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BonesMS

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Back Off Bug-A-Loo!

BonesMS

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BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4745 on: August 04, 2013, 04:55:50 PM »
Feeling useless and worthless..........................
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Hopalong

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4746 on: August 04, 2013, 06:27:58 PM »
Which
you
AIN'T.

I'm sorry you're blue, (((((((((Bones)))))))))).

Want to talk about it? It is the job frustrations?

xo
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4747 on: August 04, 2013, 07:04:32 PM »
Which
you
AIN'T.

I'm sorry you're blue, (((((((((Bones)))))))))).

Want to talk about it? It is the job frustrations?

xo
Hops

Thanks, (((((((((Hops)))))))))))))))))))).

I feel like a total screw-up. 

I was reading a book that a friend of mine published, his autobiography, where he mentioned some of his family history.  Given that I work in genealogy, I started sketching out his family tree based on what I was reading and curiosity took over.  Because many of the family records, such as marriages, births, and deaths, are over 70 years old, they can be found on websites such as FamilySearch.org.  I found records that matched what was mentioned in the book and was able to trace my friend's ancestors back to the European country they emigrated from.  I wrote down what I had discovered and sent the information to him, which was a complete shock to him as he never knew any of this.  I didn't mean to shock him.  My curiosity got out of control and I screwed up.  I am a screw-up!

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BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4748 on: August 05, 2013, 07:02:46 AM »
http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20130805

"Abby" does NOT get it that N's will NEVER hear you!!!!

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BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4749 on: August 05, 2013, 07:08:04 AM »
http://www.creators.com/advice/annies-mailbox/an-apology-a-day-may-keep-trouble-at-bay.html

And, as usual, these advice columnists are STILL clueless!!!!
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Hopalong

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4750 on: August 05, 2013, 09:15:13 AM »
But...what was wrong with that, Bones?
Maybe I'm not understanding, but it sounds like an exciting gift to him.

Do you mean that he took it the wrong way?
Was he shamed or embarrassed or something?
Was it ego if he was deflated...or something?

Did something get misunderstood?
I imagaine you did all that because you CAN and it was a way to share...

??
xxoo stop beating up on yourself, Miz B...
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4751 on: August 05, 2013, 09:39:32 AM »
But...what was wrong with that, Bones?
Maybe I'm not understanding, but it sounds like an exciting gift to him.

Do you mean that he took it the wrong way?
Was he shamed or embarrassed or something?
Was it ego if he was deflated...or something?

Did something get misunderstood?
I imagine you did all that because you CAN and it was a way to share...

??
xxoo stop beating up on yourself, Miz B...
Hops

Thanks, Hops.

He did say he was astounded but had not authorized it.  He asked me what did I expect out of this.  I can see his perspective as I'm sure he's been hit on by groupies over the years.  I wanted to make it clear that I don't consider myself a "groupie" and hope I can be considered a friend.  I shared with him that I understand how it feels to grow up with questions about ancestry and not really know WHO you are and how ancestors shaped who we became.  I'm awaiting his response.  I did comment that he expressed the question in his book and I was attempting to find his answer.  I just didn't mean to upset him if he meant the question to be rhetorical.  I guess my Asperger's did it again....... 
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Twoapenny

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4752 on: August 05, 2013, 02:23:44 PM »
Bonesie, it sounds to me like he's really over reacting to this; I'd have thought that was a lovely gesture on your part.  If he doesn't want the info he's perfectly capable of throwing it in the bin.  I'd be chuffed to bits if someone put that much time into my history and sent it to me as a gift.  It's public information; anyone could have done that research so it's not like you're invading his privacy or anything like that.  You don't need anyone's authorisation if you're checking public records, everyone can see it.  I think he's being a bit OTT and you should stop worrying (which I know is easier said than done). xx

BonesMS

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Re: Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?
« Reply #4753 on: August 05, 2013, 02:56:39 PM »
Bonesie, it sounds to me like he's really over reacting to this; I'd have thought that was a lovely gesture on your part.  If he doesn't want the info he's perfectly capable of throwing it in the bin.  I'd be chuffed to bits if someone put that much time into my history and sent it to me as a gift.  It's public information; anyone could have done that research so it's not like you're invading his privacy or anything like that.  You don't need anyone's authorisation if you're checking public records, everyone can see it.  I think he's being a bit OTT and you should stop worrying (which I know is easier said than done). xx

I don't think he's angry....just shocked.  He had never thought about actually researching his family history before as he has one crazy schedule.  If anything, I had been overreacting and beating myself up.  His manager and I have been corresponding as well and now we are all curious.  We are exploring other possibilities so stay tuned.
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