Hey Seeker and Wildflower and Portia...
In response to our discussion about feelings of unworthiness in therapy... I said I did not have the courage to face this. Well, I saw my therapist today, and after she explained something to me (for the zillionth time) I asked "Do you ever get tierd of having to tell me the same things visit after visit?"
She replied "No, because I know how easy it is to lose your experience."
So, without going into how much I worried about it, I sort of faced it... I didn't think I could... a tiny, tiny victory. "baby steps!"
Learning,
Thank you for sharing your stories about your relationships. Actually, one of the hardest things for me is to vailidate my experience, or to use the lables. It's hard for me to say to myself "this experience was abusive." It's especially hard when the act of 'abuse' was seemingly subtle, and unassuming.... When N does a really convincing job of framing my reality, I trade his alleged intention for my experience... I think, he is wonderful and I am horrible for perceiving of this situation as abusive. It can get to be a mind f*** at times. My ability to deal with it comes and goes. That's part of what keeps me. The other part is a sincere love for him, and hope that we can both heal.
One day at a time...
Peace, sjkravill