letters

[Lupita]

I cant. The resto of the people are on his side. I wanted to get rid of me and he planned it very well. There is nothing I can do. The only thing I can do is get out of there. As soon as I see an opening I will apply. I will copy and paste the e mails that I wrote today at three in the morning.

Dear Mr.
 
I am writing this e mail in the middle of my desperation. Dr. U does not like me at all and I feel he wants to get rid of me. He has told me very ugly things, then he said he never said those things. He asked me if I came swiming to this country in front of other teachers, the other teachers attacked me also. He constantly makes remarks against Spanish people in front of me, I feel provoked.He constantly pretends not to understand what I say. The las Friday he told me that parents are coplaining about my English, my English is very good and  have never had problems with it. He comes every single day to my classroom. But he never comes to my best classes, he comes to my sixth period, after lunch, almost about to go home, and they are restless, full of sugar, but still the class is very good, but he has never said anything positive to me. I work very hard, I invite you to see my classes, they are excellent.
What I am asking you is to please, help get a job somewhere else. I need to get out of there. I do not want to make waves, I do not want to respond to his attacks, I only want to get out of there. But the websites are almost empty, no openings at this time. Please, help, in the name of Jesus I am asking you to help me.
I am not going to church becasue I was invited to play the piano in another church.
Please, can you help me get a job somewhere? anywhere? In the name of Jesus.



Dear Mr. And Mrs. V, Dear Betty, please, please, I need friends that can give a  professional advise about what to do with my problems at school. If you were so kind to give me the words I should use, to help me have the attitude, how to handle my situation.
During the summer I did not look for a job. I had  signed a contract with Mr. V. I had reasonable expectations to be safe and happy at BCS. It was wonderful until two weeks ago when my saga started.  There are no openings at any place anywhere at this particular moment. Plus, I would like to get the bull by the horns and deal with the problem and turn it around. That is what I would like to do. To stay at BCS. But I feel so bad there. If somebody helps me.
The problem has to be addressed to my boss. I do not know how to.
If you are so kind to minester to me in that aspect of my life. I do not have any pleasures in life, I do not have boyfriends, I do not date, I have a very pure life. The only thing I do that really gives me pleasure is dancing. I love dancing.
Just need to make clear that I am not asking you dear borthers in Jesus, to talk to anybody, just to tell me how to do it. I do not know how to, not unly for a cultural issue but also because I am not familiar in how to do it. All the time, I never deffend my slef, I only run away, never confront the abuser. I want to stand up for my self this time.
Dr. U has been in my class almost everyday. That is not bad. That is a very good thing. And, always we are doing something. He has never been there and find me doing nothing. We are always working. Still, he does not have anything positive to say. "Are the children understanding what  they are doing?
Today, Mrs. N told me that she hated illegal immigrants. That never happened before. Why did she have to tell me that. Not only that, but she went to Dr. U and complained that I am doing favoritism in my class. She told me that many kids do not like me. She also told me that his kid do not understand what has to be done. Where is she getting this ideas. Her kid understands everything perfectly.
I am not asking you to talk to them. Not at all. I have to deal with my problem. But I need to know how to. I do not know how to.
Dr U address the problem with me, but he is mad at me. He told me that parents are complaining of my English. That never happened before. He said that I have to take lessons of pronunciation.  A couple of kids have used that as am excuse to not to do the work, in the past.  But I know that everybody understands what I say. So, I feel I am under attack. You have to see the way Mrs. Way looks at me. She is going to kill me with her eyes. Mr. F, for the first time complained about the music, I do not put it very high, but the Spanish music section is indispensable for my class. Is about the only nice thing we do that is curricular and fun to do. I bought a piece of cake for him and he did not accepted it in front of the students.  He put his arms high as a fault in basket ball and he said I do not want it.
Students stay at Mr. P class during my period, they do not get a note., they come late because he allows them to stay in his class, they miss information in my class, then I am to be blamed for the kid’s behavior.
I am playing at St J  on Sundays so I do not even get to see you any more. I cannot afford for counseling. Our insurance does not pay for counseling and I still am paying a lot of money monthly for doctors that BCBS did not pay.
When I entered BCS last year all my life changed. I feel like I am having steps back now.
I have tried to talk to Dr. U, but he tells me things, then he says that he never said it. So, what is the case to talk to him? He said that because of Mrs. N’s complain, he will have to be in my classroom more often. I do not know what to do.
I just want ideas. Words to use.  Or, if anybody can help me to find another job. You know so many people in education.
You can ask your grand daughter how good teacher I am. I am a good teacher. I promise you. I love A to pieces and she feels that I enjoy my work. Ask her. I promise you.
Please,  if you have , dear friends, dear brothers in the love of Jesus, I see you as my pastors, if you can sit with me and talk.
Does this sound like regular problems? I see that the other teachers do not have those problems. I need to know if the problems I have are similar to others. But since the other teachers do not talk to me, I do not know what is a normal problem. I do not want that if you see me you turn around and walk fast in the opposite direction because I am bothering you. So, this will be my last attempt to get help from you guys. I promise I will do my best to not to bother you any more.
God bless you.


I saw him today at school and he asked me if I had a good day today. I said yes. I had a relatively good day. He said that he and his wife wanted to see me at his house on Thursday after school. He gave me the address. He is my ex boss and he is an important member of the church, he is in the school board and he has been head of school many times during hi 44 years ine ducation. I do not know why is he allowing this to happen. I do not know why. I start to feel that he knows. I do not know if he cannot do anything or he agrees, or he allows, or he is my enemy, he was very good to me last year. I am very confused. I do not know who is good and who is bad. I do not know who to trust. I do not trust anybody there. Dr. U has converted our school in a battle field. How can the administrators not notice anything? how can the allow it? Why?

I had to remove the other thread. I started feeling very scared and fear and thought that I had to remove it.

[Lupita]

what does God want to teach me? Why the compulsion to say things that will get me in trouble? Why God does not open another door? There were many position during summer. I did not apply. Why God did not made me? I thougth I was doing fine. What happened herer? Who is who?

[Lupita]

Dear Mr. P:
 
Because I know that you are a wonderful person I decided to write you. This is only between you and me.I have not told anybody and I will not tell anybody. I have to tell you with all my love for you, because I know that you are doing a wonderful job with the kids, that I am having problems becasue of some of your actions, or better said, lack of action. Several students do not come to my class because they stay with you. M L is going to fail thes quarter. H S has a good grade but for the first time in a long time he was very disrespectful to me and accused me of favoritism for allowing Y R to go to your class. I cannot be giving him explanations of what I do. But Y speaks Spanish perfectly and she will not be damaged by missing the informayion, so if she asks me permission to do something else I do not have any inconvenient to allow her to go. But H, although he knows some Spanish, he does not know as much. So, he needs to be on time, we have a quiz every Friday, he needs to be there. Then he asks me permission to go to the bathroom and he does not go there but to your class. If you are so kind to not let him stay with you at any time during sixth period, I would be so thankful, him or any student.
You know that I appreciate you very much because when some teachers are being very unfriendly to me, you always have a smile and you have never been mean to me. I love you for that in the name of Jesus.
Thank you.
You have a lot of power over the kids, thank God you do,and Thank God we have you. Please, help me during sixth period.
Your friend and sister in Jesus.

[Lupita]

Thank you Izzi. God bless you. I appreciate your help in PM. Thank you. The intention was not that, just advice. What to do. But it seems that yes, I need to take classes. I just do not have the money to pay 900 dollars at a University. I just cant.

[isittoolate]

Thank you Lupita,

I confess I was not following your story because it was teachers and students===(I am no help there)=========could be mother and child===(That's all over and done for me)=========(even husband and wife.)

Just remember you have a VOICE in whatever you do that concerns you and your 'welfare' (well-being, happiness, contentment) You are in control of you. No one else is! There are certain rules to be followed by am employee, but as long as you don't cross those lines, you are entitled to speak up when something is unfair, or harassing.

Take Good Care.

Loce
Izzy

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[Lupita]

I was coming out of the school yesterday after my piano lessons at 7:00 PM, was working since 5:00 AM, when I saw Mr. V my ex boss. He said that he wants to talk to me at his house with his wife and help me out with counseling. He has been 44 years in education and he is powerful in the church.

I do not know if he is my friend enymore. I thought he was. But he is allowing Dr. U to do bad things. I am very disappointed of him. I do not know who to trust. I feel terrible.

But yesterday Monday my day was not that bad, and for some reason. Dr. U did not come into my classroom. I totally dislike the way he treas me and I have hopes that there are others who dislike him.

He eats with the click. There is a click of teacher who eat together everyday and he eats with them. Those teaches are untouchable. They are mean and they support Dr. U. Some day Dr. U will miss around with one of them. I hope.

I pray that something happens and Dr. U does not stay at my school.

I am always the pray, always.

[lighter]

OK.... I'm not understanding if you talked to the administrator again or not but he asked you to his house to counsel you?

On the whole, that sounds positive.

I don't blame you for fearing and doubting your situation.  I understand.

The fact that the Dr. stayed out of your classroom says that someone spoke to him and the invitation seems timely..... that it's likely that fellow.

I hope this is help for you Lupita.

I hope you won't be driven small and fearful for the next 8 months like a little scared bunny.  That is so disturbing for me to contemplate.

All the writing you've done is great, soul cleansing mind straightening work.

Hard, but necessary.  Well done.

I hope you feel more clarity and understanding of the situation, if only so you can speak about it calmly and clearly when you meet with administrator Thurs.

Think about how to say what you need to say succinclty, in as few words as possible, so that he understands easily and follows.

No one wants all this to be true......

present the facts and let him draw the conclusions, in other words.

Don't tell him what to think and don't tell him what the Dr. meant to do.

Make a list of exactly what the Dr. does/did that is upsetting and memorize it.

You can tell him how this has made you feel too but..... he really wants to hear the facts so he can help solve it, I'm hoping.

Are there any good things the Dr. has done?  If not.... you can say, "I wish I could say he's been kind or helpful at some point but, that's not been the case."

Don't get too emotional..... you're still a professional, right? 

Right.

[Lupita]

He is not an administrator. He is important person in the church. He is my ex boss, has been in education for 44 years, retired now, he invited me to that church. He is best friend with the president of the school board of my school. That is who he is. He has his grand daoughter in my class.

He is empowering this man to do what he is doing. So I do not know if he is my enemy or not. I have no idea. I am going to his house in fear.

I am afraid that his wife is mad at me for teh attention I get from him. I saw one of his duaghters, she is a volleuball coach at the school, I told her hello four times and she did not answer until I almost forced her to say hellow.

So, something must be going on there. I did not do anything wrong. Nothing. I am a victim. I hate to say it. I have been victimized. Again.

[lighter]

AAHHHHhhhhh!  WOuldn't that be just perfect..... that there's some female crap going on behind the scenes.

Lupita.  You have to go and you have to talk to the wife too.  She needs to understand what's going on and I think you'll know from her behavior whether or not she's relishing your agony (bc her husband really likes you or whatever) or if she was just caught up in her own unhappy life and finds she wants to reach out to you, once she sees you're a suffering human who has done nothing to her.

I sure hope that they aren't allowing this to go on, or facilitating... God forbid.

So, this is the guy that was asked to stand up in front of the church with you? 

The Pastor was the one that was trying to make you feel comfortable and welcome in the church, right?

I hope Dr. stays out of your class today, and pretty much for the next 8 months. 

In the meantime, keep your eye peeled  for an employment opportunity elsewhere and think about what you're going to say, and how you're going to say it, when get that audience with your ex boss and his wife. 

[Hopalong]

Lupita, hon:

Minimize the "HE" statements and maximize the "I" statements, okay?

At work I am feeling
unwelcome
harrassed
disliked
scapegoated
discriminated against
ganged up on
disrespected
unappreciated
bullied

(Whatever is true for you.)
Just HONEST, including your pain, but without melodrama.

love
Hops

[Lupita]

yes, he is the one that stood up at the door fo the church with me. The pastor made him.
Today Dr. U was in my third period for about 20 minutes. I do believe that I did a great job. I was giving tokens to the kids that answered questions correct, of 18 kids 17 were engaged in class and only one was not working, but not disrupting either. One was a smart a*s and ran his mouth for a second but I ignored him and continued teaching, everybody paid attention to me. He always find something negative to say, but I know that I did a great job. I was asking questions that were covered and already written on the pverhead and as they asnwered I uncovered the question, and I said "if your anwere so correct it will match my answer in the overhead perfectly", and all thier answers were perfect. It would be almost impossible that he could tell me that mys students were not understanding what I was doing. When I left I saw him in the parking lot and I said Hi Dr U, did you see how smart are my students? and he said, they seem tobe very smart. Then I said, if you come to my classes everyday you can learn some Spanish, I can give you your homework and give you a zero if you sonot do it, the he said, no, I dont think so.

I talked with one of the teachers, she loves me and she is my only friend. She said that he is watching me. She said "You are being watch. be very careful, work for the Lord and do your best, after that, do not think that he exists, work as if he does not exist."

The librarian is the most hypocritical person I have ever seen. She is the evel. She is liar, selfish and N. She calls her self a Christian and she is a back stabber.

[lighter]

The world's full of selfish lying back stabbers. 

6 out of 25 people are sociopaths.  I can't hardly wrap my mind around that, Lupita.

You're not one of them, however so..... you have to get yourself into a space where you're safe and out of harms way.

That other teacher knows things... the one that likes you.

What else does she hear?

I'd like to know...... seems she hears things and people talk.

The librarian is a little person who sucks up to the boss. 

Hypachristians aren't all that rare either.

You... I think you're the rare one, Lupita.

Don't let them steal your goodness and your spark.... use that intelligence and trust your gut. 

Don't run around in circles, though sometimes it just has to get out that way...... try to remember that you're a great teacher and that there isn't anything to fire you over.

It's hard for people to stand up to bullies.... even good people don't want to get involved in that. Maybe your ex boss will surprise you..... be prepared to listen to him first.... so you have an idea what he's about before you speak.

[Lupita]

Before I was leaving I saw my two worst students together, chit chatting with Dr. U. One of them is the son of the librarian. That boy is liar like his mother. Always saying I did not do the work because I di dnot understand what Mrs. Lupita said. I did not do teh work because Mrs. Lupita did not explain it. She did not tell me. I did not hear it. He has 1000 excuses and his mother bakcs him up and Dr. U backs him up too.
The other is the one who always goes around with his bible in his hand, always critizicing others nad judging others.
I read today in class James 2:1-12 about controling the tongue. To see if he understands what he is doing.

[lighter]

Hey... Lupita.

I haven't heard you talk about anything really


really





really




important lately.




DANCING!

What happened to dance class and beach volley ball and working out?

Don't forget to stick with your self care regime.... even if you don't feel like it. 

It's very important, even if you have no energy and would rather eat a bug.... it'll pay off later.

Are you keeping fresh salad makings in the house?

Drinking plenty of water?

Breath...... and remember to be kind to yourself.

[Lupita]

I feel bad today but not as bad as before because i had two days with out mejor events.

The teacher that is my friend has not heard anything. She told me that she is making indutive thoughts through what i have been telling her.

I do not what I would do with out you guys. Thank you.

I feel powerless and hopeless.

But, since Mr. V is going to talk to me on Thursday, maybe I am not as powerless as I thought. Maybe God wants me to be humble.