This is a bit of how I transferred from one point to another to reach this one and a certain amount of peace. I don't see where responses are necessary but would be nice.When I was released from rehab hospital, I was classified as a partial paraplegic. I could walk with crutches and used a wheelchair. I planned on picking up my life where I left off but it doesn’t work that way.
Accessibility was just beginning, for parking spots, ramps, washrooms, turnstiles removed, no revolving doors and I tried to fit into the able-bodied world. I didn’t do too badly, as I was 31 and adventurous.
I went to my doctor with ‘chair and crutches, I could stand up but needed a crutch to boost me up to the examining table, I didn’t expect it, but he sent me for x-ray. The Medical Centre was built in 2 sections, both accessible from the outside, but inside was a set of 5 steps to go to the other. I wheeled to the steps, stood up on my crutches and sent the wheelchair down by itself, bumpity bump bump bump bump, roll over, slam and fold up,t hen used the crutches to get down and pick up the ‘chair and carry on to x-ray. I was stared at.
I had a number of falls while on crutches, and the first one ended up with a broken foot. It was never detected on an x-ray and that foot healed crooked. (That foot has now been casted with this leg break and appears to be straightened.) By now I have broken all toes except the little ones, broke this leg and ankle before (1984), fractured this ankle before, broke my left ankle, 2003 and this one are the 3 with casts. Other times I’ve had mild fractures and used elastic bandages.
I learned how to do everything I needed, and with my daughter’s help we managed.
When she left home for University and then marriage, I rented her room to a local college student, 17.. I really didn’t like that setup at all!!!!!!! So I sold my house, 1984, and moved to an apt. I seldom used my crutches there. But I was still strong on them in 1998 at age 59
I spent 4 years with the N and always in the chair, then left him and 5 years now and used my crutches a few time to go to clients who wanted computer instruction. That faded off as I got better jobs I could do at home and it suddenly dawned on me that really--yes
really----- I was a disabled person and my life was different and I ought to accept it,
as I pretty well had, but hadn’t recognized, BUT others had to accept it too.
That is why when my brother and sister came for 2 days in August this year, I decided that my tour route would be all accessible and they would have to do it ‘my way’
.---getting better eh? They were quite happy with the tours we took and our visit in general, and beer for brother, wine for sister.
The first indication of my week knees came about May of this year. I was low on potassium. That was fixed but weakness returned and I was having a number of falls when I stood up to put the chair into the car. I planned on a doctor visit, but I was now sure that my age and my lack of using crutches was making my knees weaker. If I wanted to walk (why? At 68) I could likely have gone for physical therapy and go through it all again as rehab in 1970. I left the Dr. appointment too late anyway, ‘cause I fell at the therapist’s.
I have now decided I am in the disabled section of life and will stay that way. I don’t want any more breaks (hip--NO NO NO), injuries of any kind, so I’ve learned, while still in a cast to put the chair in the car while sitting down on the car seat.
AHA! I have it perfected now!I will no longer live in limbo between 2 (3?) types of lives and they ARE different.
Yes! I am a paraplegic who can wiggle her ass and move her legs, tuck in her tummy, but just can’t stand up anymore and feels no pain from below the knees down.
So breaking legs can be fun when there is no pain.
Why stand when I can’t carry a cup of coffee, or a laundry basket because using the chair I might find money on the sidewalk. and when I go shopping and people look at me with awe, that I can buy 4 bags of groceries, load up and go home.
Yes Izzy. This is your life and you have very slowly arrived at this sense of peace and to Hell with some people, too numerous to mention.
Signed this 7th day of November, in the year 2007
Izzy
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