Author Topic: Questions  (Read 948 times)

Kimberli63

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Questions
« on: December 10, 2007, 08:45:24 PM »
I have been thinking about this for a while. I wonder why  I think it is my job to fix things. Is this because I think it is my fault or, at least, have I been  tricked into believing I caused the problem and therefore it is my  responsibility to fix it? Or does it satisfy some need I  have to be wanted and needed, even if I get no affirmation? Or is it that I  feel so superior that I think I can fix anything? Do I think I am  God? Does it make me  feel good to be a martyr?

Is it my responsibility  to be responsible for another person's happiness? Is it a need I have to be needed? Do I need to suffer to feel needed? Is it a learned response? Why do I keep choosing people who are needy, one way or another?

Why did I keep caring when it was obvious, they didn't care or have the same needs as me? Why didn't I abandon them? Was it because I thought others would judge me? Did I not want to be seen as heartless?

Why is my commitments to my family so important? Is it because I feel I would be seen as failure if I didn't look after my family? Why do I care what others think? Is it because I want my family to have stability and I think I can provide it?

Why do I project too much of what I feel onto others? Why do I think everyone wants the same things? Am I  trying to save the world? Maybe, some people just don't want to know?
« Last Edit: December 10, 2007, 10:19:40 PM by Kimberli63 »

Hopalong

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Re: Questions
« Reply #1 on: December 10, 2007, 08:48:16 PM »
Hi Kim,
Grab any one of those questions at random.

Sit with it for a moment.
See what floats up...

even a starter phrase of a partial answer.

Don't worry about being correct.

Share that. The starter...

Hopalong
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

lighter

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Re: Questions
« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2007, 08:54:53 PM »
I think it's in some people's natures to ask why, what did I do... what can I do to fix this? and so on.

It's also in some people's natures to blame, skirt responsibility and never question their motives or actions.

Guess which category you fit in?

Guess which responds better to therapy?


You probably have been blamed, on top of it, and made to feel responsible.

Time to set up healthy boundaries and begin defending them like a mama tiger protecting her cub.

I love the word "appropriate."

Taking care of what is ours to care for.... taking care of ourselves as a priority.