I know Iphi, it is difficult. Beacuse since you leave, I leave, I never stay to pick the crops of my work. I have done it so many times. I lost an important scholarship in research because I could nor deal with my suoervisor, I lost the oportunity to work in a university because I could not dea with the person that was training me, I turned to piano, then back to medicine, then back to paino, then come to USA, then teaching, I left a very nice froup of piano students in my country, the house that I built, my mother paid me a misery for it, I have been leaving and running away, never enough to be able to have old friends, to have savings, 50 yo and no properties, no savings, nothing, and even in here, I am always tempted to leave the board every time somebody triggers me.
I have to stop.
Today my sixth period was bad, not as bad as last week, but not good, but I felt bad only for two hours, I feel well now and I am going to dance class tonight. So, I guess I am improving.