a hermit?

[Lupita]

Not a problem CH, I am sure that Hermes knows which is which. The husband thing is for you and the psychoterapy thing is ofr Hermes.

And CH, if you choose to engae with me on  a blow out friday night, do not aplogize later. I will not feel guilty if we have some fun......LOL

[Hermes]

Dear Lupita:

There are good men out there of all faiths.  Many so called devoted Christians are not good men, at all, and of course some are too.  
I would want  a man to be ethical, in all things, to be true and sincere, above all true to himself. And above all, SANE!  Lol.

Hermes  

[Lupita]

Hermes, then they are not good Chrsitians, they are hypochristians. I dont want those either. That is why I have stayed alone for 17 years.

A good Chrstian would have those qualities that you just mentioned above.

By the way, you talk with the assurance of a man. If you do not say, I would swear I am talking to a man. Testosteron makes man think in a different way that estrgens and progestorone do to brains. And sometimes women have more or less testosteron circulating, I mean wih out being pathological, and that has a lot to do with personality and audacity, and intellectualism, etc.

[Hermes]

You are just great, Lupita!  Very sharp.
I have often been told I think like a man, by many people.  Maybe I was a man in another life (oh, dear, maybe I had better not say such things LMAO).  I like men, I get on well with them, and I think they feel comfortable with me.   I had no sisters, all male cousins, (my two female cousins were a lot older than me), so I suppose that made me get in on the male airwaves....
But no, I am a woman, with all the trimmings LOL.  A sketchy identikit: I am 5 ft. 7 inches tall, just over 9 stone in weight, blonde hair, grey eyes. 

All the best Lupita.  I know you are a lovely lady.
Hermes

[Lupita]

wow, now I am jealouse. I am short, (to caucasian standards), I guess you do not need a choma after parenthesis, do you?

Dark hair, and dark skin but bleach my hair, a blonde wanna be.

Like they say, the brain of a brunnete and the what of a blonde? I dont remember, and I have had nothing to drink.

And yes, you do think like a man and express your self displaying a thought process very similar to a highly educated man.

[Hermes]

Thank you again, Lupita, for your kind words.  You make me feel "validated". LOL. 
IMO there is nothing wrong with expressing a view in an outspoken way.  In fact I think it shows more consideration for the person listening than being oblique, which can lead to great misunderstanding.  Obliqueness is IMO an aspect of voicelessness, where one is unable to say (or worse still, punished) what one thinks.

Take care
Hermes

[Certain Hope]

IMO there is nothing wrong with expressing a view in an outspoken way.  In fact I think it shows more consideration for the person listening than being oblique, which can lead to great misunderstanding. 

Hermes,

I absolutely agree here... and would like to add - I've come to the conclusion that obliqueness is often the tool of manipulators who go about the business of planting seeds of suspicion and doubt via vague insinuations, rather than placing a matter firmly and clearly onto the table for discussion. THAT, I find, most aggravating. The way I feel is - - if there's evidence, then let's hear it! Otherwise, keep your doubts and suspicions to yourself and don't contaminate the playing field with a load of vague references.

Carolyn

P.S. on edit - I am using the generic "you" here, and not speaking of you personally, Hermes... lol

[Leah]

Thank you again, Lupita, for your kind words.  You make me feel "validated". LOL. 
IMO there is nothing wrong with expressing a view in an outspoken way.  In fact I think it shows more consideration for the person listening than being oblique, which can lead to great misunderstanding.  Obliqueness is IMO an aspect of voicelessness, where one is unable to say (or worse still, punished) what one thinks.

Take care
Hermes

Thank you, Hermes

Likewise, for making me feel "validated"

Re:  Obliqueness;

          Adjective:   Not straightforward; indirect; obscure; hence, disingenuous; underhand; perverse; sinister.


Here on the board, I have been referred to as speaking with straightforwardness.

Which, incidentally, is exactly the same, as in real life, out in the world, hitherto.


Love, Leah

WYSIWYG

[Hermes]

LOL Carolyn.  The "you" is fine by me. 

Thank you too Leah. 

As the saying goes: it is good to "say what you mean, and mean what you say". 

A great weekend to all.
Hermes

[Certain Hope]

LOL Carolyn.  The "you" is fine by me. 

Thank you too Leah. 

As the saying goes: it is good to "say what you mean, and mean what you say". 

A great weekend to all.
Hermes

   Thanks, Hermes... and a wonderful weekend to you, as well.  Here's to more forthright, direct communication! 

Carolyn

[Leah]

LOL Carolyn.  The "you" is fine by me. 

Thank you too Leah. 

As the saying goes: it is good to "say what you mean, and mean what you say". 

A great weekend to all.
Hermes

Dear Hermes,

Like it; "say what you mean, and mean what you say"

and also, "Let your yes be yes, and, your no be no"

otherwise,

a double minded man(or woman) is unstable, tossing back and forth, on the waves.

Enjoy your weekend.

Love, Leah




Slán agus beannacht leat

[Lupita]

CH and Lea posted to address Hermes, so I just wanted to say thanks to Hermes.

Thank you Hermes, you also give validation.

[SilverLining]

It has been a long time since I have gone out with “friends” or just do something with someone that is of a social kind, and/or of my interest.  I think, the last time I went dancing with “Friends” was before thanks giving.
I had a very bad day at work today and I did not have anybody to call to talk about it. I realized I have been spending too much of my leisure time on the board. I need to be with real people. But my experience with real people is so bad, that I do not know if I want it. Am I becoming a hermit?
Is this happening to any of you?

I understand the ambivalence.  We are not supposed to want or like solitude.  The "system" needs people who spend their lives chattering away on their cell phones and paying the big monthly fee for unlimited minutes.  Hermits living happily in caves aren't good for business.  It's also good for business if miserable people stick with the N's in their lives and console themselves with consumer goods. 

When I was 26 I had a trip planned with friends.  They all backed out on me and after a few hours of sulking I decided to take a leap and go it alone.  It was one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life.  20 years later, I look back and realize these "friends" were something closer to vampires.  Going it alone was a necessary step for me.   

[Hermes]

Yes, Tjr, it is great to travel alone, and to be alone, when one chooses.  I often travelled alone, still do.  It is a great experience.

Solitude is wonderful, if that is what the person wants and likes. 

All the best
Hermes

[Hermes]

""......... so, I do not believe that a distressful husband is the will or god."" (Lupita).

Yes, indeed.  I was getting along just fine until ex-N crossed my path.  Well, he didn"t exactly cross my path.  I was introduced to him.  Isn"t that so ironic.  I"d never have met him otherwise.  Very unlikely.

Best to all
Hermes