Strongholds

[mudpuppy]

Mud. Mud.

Is there bad news?

Depends on your perspective I guess. We're all going to die. If you consider that bad news then I guess there is some.
I personally am not worried as I have heard some Good News.

If you're referring to my wife she is healthy as a particularly sleek and frisky horse.

mud

[Hopalong]

Ahhh good.
Shoulda figured...she couldn't stand to leave you so she got well!

I think I'm not afraid of death itself, Mud.

But I am scared of loneliness and suffering before death.

Hmmm.

Maybe it'll just take care of itself.

Happy Sunday even,

Hops

[teartracks]

Hi Mud,

We're all going to die.

I've been thinking of this some lately.  Is life a terminal disease or a terminal condition, or a terminal syndrome, (don't know if syndromes kill you or not), or a terminal disorder (don't know if these kill either, though I came close)?

tt

[Ami]

To get back to the topic of strongholds; a stronghold is a thought that keeps repeating in your head. My friend told me that she had a stronghold thought  that she did not deserve anything good, b/c of  mistakes.
 I am noticing my strongholds. One is 'I can never be "normal" b/c I had  my M."
 Another is I am "bad" b/c I am "selfish".
  Another is I am too weak to function in the world.
 Another is that I will never stop turning on myself and will never be able to be my own best friend,so why not just give up, now.
  Another is that I have to cling to "safety". I have to try to make my world very small ,so I can be safe.
 Another is that I cannot deal with people's anger.
 People's anger means that I am "bad".
  It shows the "truth" about me, that I am "bad"
Another is that   I have to hide who I am so I don't get shamed.
 Another is that I have to give myself away to you ,so you won't shame me.
 Another is that if you like me, *I* don't have to feel shame. I can avoid it.
  Another is that you have to think I am "normal" for me to not feel shame.
 Another is that if you think *I* am weird, I have to shame myself.
 Another is if I am selfish ,I have to punish myself.
 Whew--I did not know I had so many.
 I have more, I am very sure.
I think bringing these things to light is a way to heal.
 Thank you to anyone who "endured" that list.                                                                         Love   Ami

[Gaining Strength]

I have made judgements against myself that are tied into judgements against others.  These have worked together to keep me isolated.  The shame my father projected onto me I took on and formed resentment and held his judgements against me.  The weaknesses my mother projected onto me engendered resentments and a hatred and scathing judgement about her weaknesses towards her.  All of these have found a way to turn on me an bind me up.  I am in the process of identifying them so that I can break them.  I worked on a similar process a year ago to break through the outer layer of shame and was successful.  I will be successful at this as well.  I feel must stronger going into this process than I did the one last year.

These judgements are strongholds that are about to be busted.

[Ami]

Dear GS
 It helps to identify them. Once you can express them, specifically, you are on the way out,I think.       Love to you,   Ami