Sam

[Onyx]

Nassim

Cheers big ears   I know, I know! I'm not making a slight against you, just thanking you in an English way for what you just wrote!

......and just to lighten tings up a little more round here:

What wears thick horned rimmed glasses and has a wet nose...............a short sighted Gynaecologist!!

Alas don't tell me, Sam the financial Vampire, is a Gynaecologist too!! He must be as he sure as hell is taking the urine (piss) out of most people!

Sorry if the joke offends........but I just thought it ran along with my last sentence!

Onyx

[gardener]

I read up about Sam a while ago and he isn't actually a doctor at all. He was supposed to have taken an online course which automatically gives you a certificate when you finish it. He calls himself a doctor on the strength of that. Anyone could pay to take the test and do the same.
But isn't part of this disorder being a big con anyway?

[Onyx]

Gardener

Absolutely.....and as a great many people on this site would testify to!

If one links him with other Narcissistic based internet support groups, then all you really have is a 'shop front' for a con man!!!! I can't believe the integrity of people who purport to run support groups for those in distress who have been mangled as a result of being in a relationship with a Narcissist. These people are actively marketing Sam the quacks material and probably for financial gain! They are at best being dishonest in taking advantage of vunerable people!

narcissiticabuse.com is one such site. Again today I have so far received 3 more mails from them/Mr Vaknin peddling his book amongst other things. I deliberately have not removed myself from his mailing list because I'm keen to see how he and his site con people! I am also angered that they can get away with it so easily and at times when people are perhaps at their most vunerable!

It really is a terrible thing to do! Individuals who are clearly damaged as a result of being in a relationship with a Narcissist, turning to internets site for help run by a 'grade A' Narcissist with NPD!!! Out from the frying pan and into the fire!!

David

[DenmarkGuy]

Sam notwithstanding, my 15+ years of poking around in my psyche, trying to figure out "what's wrong with me" has led me to believe that the vast majority of "disorder specific" books (and websites, and lecutres) are phrased in such a way that 10-15% of the people end up thinking they are afflicted with something that (from a scientifcally measured perspective) strikes 1-2% of the population. As was pointed out above, we become "desperate" for something to latch onto, and then we end up reading something and saying "Yeah! That's ME! Well, kinda...." and running with it. I'm not saying that we can't extract assorted "gold nuggets" from these sources-- I just think it pays to not be "overly inclusive" in the process of self-diagnosis.

Of course, Sam Vaknin is a "marketing machine."

--Peter

[Amused Observer]

While the above announcement list IS owned by Sam Vaknin, what he sends out are not written by him, but articles gleaned from many sources, most of them available on the Internet, and many of them the result of work of qualified professionals.

It is universally common for psychology students and medical students to become convinced that they and everyone they meet has whatever disease and condition they are currently studying.    The syndrome is also well-known when the popular press begins writing about some "new" disease.   Doctors have acknowledged the power of suggestion for years.

Sam does not say or suggest that everyone has NPD.   But it is true that every normal human being has some narcissistic qualities and behaviors.   Thus it is not unlikely to glom on to a behavior or three, and make an amateur "diagnosis".     This propensity passes with time.

Just trying to bring some balance into this slam thread.

Amused Observer

[Onyx]

Would you 'Adam and Eve it'......'Amused' joined this site and replied, in the defense of Sam Vaknin, on the same day....and not be be seen or heard from again! Now this kind of strikes moi as being a bit odd! Out of all the things one could read and express a view on from this site....'Amused' just drops by to speak up for Dr Twot! I would have used the word 'T.at', but then they're useful and Vaknin's not!!

So who have we the pleasure of reading from? Is it one of his lackies or has the.....erm....man himself condescended to lower himself posing as someone else in his self-defense?

I would also like to add that I sent a stinging e-mail in reply to the many received from narcissisticabuse.com. Immediately the three or four mails a day sent by them stopped! Any you know what....yep that's right, up pops 'Amused' and posts on here.....what a coincidence!!

At what does 'Amused' masturbate furiously about..."balance"! Well 100 percent lop sided balance in defense of Dr Who!

This guy is surrounded with publishing and media people jumping on the financial band wagon of Narcissism! For the very few amongst us who have suffered at the hands of these people, Vaknin is an afront to human decency! This is about money......and nothing else! Vaknin and his kind are self confessed Narcissists who openly agree that they have and continue to exploit people ruthlessly! Yet either him or one of his lap dogs jump to his defence on a site that clearly exists because of shit like him! 'Amused', I'm amazed that you haven't caught the irony of wankers like him! It's like Satan going to the gates of Heaven and expecting tea a muffin with God whilst asking him what all the fuss is about!!!

Vaknin needs to peddle stuff to a wider audiance than there really exists! 2 percent of the market place who suffer with NPD is not enough to make one millions! In creating a bigger audiance, in convincing the masses that their problems of that of dealing with a Narcissist, he, amongst other, are creating a stampede effect were there isn't one! He is focused on bringing as many individuals as possible to the conclussion that they are in a relationship, or have just left one, with someone suffering from NPD! Not so, it's a bloody lie! But what's new here, cos he's a bloody lie in the first place!

On a lighter note; a very good post Denmarkguy.....you've hit it pretty much on the nail!

Onyx aka David

PS....why not reveal more about yourself 'Amused'.....I'm in the open....what have you to hide?

[BlueTopaz]

Hi David,

Last night I had a very, very vivid dream, that I was shrieking at my x-N dating partner, telling him that he was a flaming N, and what it was, and all the N behaviors he did.   It was at some function where his friends and parents were too, and they heard it all.  He burst into tears.  It was a very disturbing dream, actually, and I woke up with a negative vibe, feeling emotionally hurt, too.

So then I get up, and see a single ripped out page from a newspaper, on a table in my room.   I look at it curiously, and it is a full page article entitled “Narcissism-The Disease Of The 21st Century ?”    Geez!!!    Right after I had that dream!!  I was a little freaked out for sure, wondering what was going on in that moment, and if the universe was trying to tell me something…    I didn’t even have any idea as to how the article got there at first.

Only when I turned it over, I realized there was something a friend wanted me to see on the other side, and I’d put it there before going to bed.   I simply picked up the opposite side.   But what are the odds of a Nism article on that other side!!

Anyway, my point (there is one lol) in commenting back on this thread, was because of the content of that article.   The whole thing quoted Sam Vaknin, and was based on his views of Nism.    This was a local (not national) French only newspaper, in Canada.   I can’t tell you how surprised I was to see that.

My point is that journalists are often doing different stories each day or week, not really having the time to delve into any one topic very deeply (unless they are doing a series).    So, with the ability for very quick online research, and also saturation of Sam V. stuff out there, I’m afraid there is going to be more misconception (the over exaggeration) spread, just via the way journalism works…   If the writer is really rushed, then balance of the issue can suffer.  Some people will read that article and think that is what narcissism is, and they will think “wow, I didn’t know it was all around me in my life like that”.   Then, they can begin to see Nism where it isn’t.

Again, I was surprised to see all of Sam V.'s words in a more smallish market- but there it was...   Too bad the whole thing will continue to get perpetuated that way, too