My NM used sex to scare me. She was so certain that I would be a "bad girl" and get pregnant in HS that she would tell me horrifying stories about sex and pregnancy. When I was old enough to have "the talk," she never explained sex to me, just told me to never do it unless I was married and wanted a baby, and then to never do it again because it was "dirty." I ended up getting my sex education from school - from the silly films they showed and from playground talk.
Once I reached HS, M used to constantly tell me that she almost died giving birth to me, three days of labor, that the pain was so intense she begged them to shoot her, and so on. That made me a "bad child," while my brother, the golden child, was a "good boy," because he didn't hurt coming out (well, duh, I was the first). She constantly told me tales of friends she had known who got pregnant as teenagers and died. She would describe the pain and bleeding in gruesome detail. Well, I didn't get pregnant in HS (you kind of need a boyfriend for that to happen, and I wasn't allowed to date). The real impact was that I never had a child at all. She put so much fear in my mind that I could never get past it as an adult. That wasn't the only reason that I decided against having children, but it was definitely a factor.
Kathy
