One for our team

[cgm1028]

So I want to relate a story today regarding beating my NM at her own game.

Three years ago, to my complete horror, my NM moved near me after my Father passed away.  She had lived in another state and it was heaven.  At the time we offerred to put her on our Friends and Family phone plan, until she got herself organized and got her own plan.  At first she was going to get a land line and just have the cell phone for travel and emergencies.  Well, typical N behavior, since no one was going to do this for her, and SHE actually had to make the effort, it never got done and she continued to be on our plan.  Frankly at first, it was not an issue.  The cost to add her line was minimal and we added extra minutes to cover her calls.  Well as time went on she was using more minutes than we were and also calling information to get phone numbers instead of looking them up in the telephone book that I went and got her.  The charges were adding up and we had numerous conversations with her about this.  She would be good for a while and promise to look into getting herself her own plan, well of course it never happened.  Well we got another wild bill Tuesday and my DH told her that she needed to cover the additional costs.  NM got all huffy and acted insulted and said well then I'll just get my own plan then.  She was super nasty to DH, like we were being so unreasonable.  He said, "Good, you'd better because I will be taking you off our plan on Thursday (today).  You have all day Wednesday to work something out."

So today DH called first thing in the morning and had NM removed.  She called in a state a few minutes ago from her next-door neighbors phone, screaming at me that she had no service.  DH took the phone and calmly told her that she had been warned, that she was a selfish and ungrateful b***tch (his exact words) and that she'd better get down to the local cell phone store and get her own plan.  He then hung up.  I love that guy!!!

[Portia]

Hi there cgm, why was this beating her at her own game? Seems like you and H behaved fairly well under the circumstances. There's nothing like telling people the consequences of their actions and then letting them receive them. Pity that some people are never going to learn that particular lesson...

[cgm1028]

Normally when she got all huffy and insulted, we would placate her.  That's the lesson NM's teach us.  We have no rights, its only them.  How dare we make her responsible for her actions.  Its all about me, you need to take care of me.  But this time, we followed through and did not let her bully us into feeling guilty.  I am prepared that she will tell our entire family how heartless we are, coloring the picture to make herself the aggrieved party.  N's are masters at this game.  But this time, I don't care.  They can think what they want.

[BonesMS]

So I want to relate a story today regarding beating my NM at her own game.

Three years ago, to my complete horror, my NM moved near me after my Father passed away.  She had lived in another state and it was heaven.  At the time we offerred to put her on our Friends and Family phone plan, until she got herself organized and got her own plan.  At first she was going to get a land line and just have the cell phone for travel and emergencies.  Well, typical N behavior, since no one was going to do this for her, and SHE actually had to make the effort, it never got done and she continued to be on our plan.  Frankly at first, it was not an issue.  The cost to add her line was minimal and we added extra minutes to cover her calls.  Well as time went on she was using more minutes than we were and also calling information to get phone numbers instead of looking them up in the telephone book that I went and got her.  The charges were adding up and we had numerous conversations with her about this.  She would be good for a while and promise to look into getting herself her own plan, well of course it never happened.  Well we got another wild bill Tuesday and my DH told her that she needed to cover the additional costs.  NM got all huffy and acted insulted and said well then I'll just get my own plan then.  She was super nasty to DH, like we were being so unreasonable.  He said, "Good, you'd better because I will be taking you off our plan on Thursday (today).  You have all day Wednesday to work something out."

So today DH called first thing in the morning and had NM removed.  She called in a state a few minutes ago from her next-door neighbors phone, screaming at me that she had no service.  DH took the phone and calmly told her that she had been warned, that she was a selfish and ungrateful b***tch (his exact words) and that she'd better get down to the local cell phone store and get her own plan.  He then hung up.  I love that guy!!!

WHOA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  GOOD FOR DH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   

Bones

[sKePTiKal]

Hm - DH sounds like a master of boundaries! And I'll bet it really does feel like winning one!

With practice, it gets easier.