Hiya Flower.
Sorry a biggie. Think I should tell you some stuff. I’m overwhelmed by your post (in a good way). A bit about what I did here. Boring but I want to say it. You posted that first link and it was great. I thought good, I can post that Rowe quote I saved about apologising coz the whole passage had a big effect on me. But at the time I wanted to not be Portia.
So I was Dot. And as Dot, I didn’t address you directly (say thank you for the link) coz I thought it was more anonymous. Make sense? Maybe not. I was glad people liked the post. So I thought at some point I must come back and identify the quote (to give Rowe her due as well). You posted about seeing question marks and I thought ‘odd’ maybe you’ve got that software that blanks out certain combinations of words? (Seeker mentioned she got asterixes when she typed ‘pushed hard on’ or something.) So I posted a question and you posted something back. And I pondered what was wrong. Then I thought aha, maybe it was the term ‘parental control filter’? Which is a computer term to me – filters out porny stuff so kids can’t access it. Maybe you’d taken that to mean something totally different, like some weird dig at your thinking? Possible I thought. Then you said you were fine with the question marks - (I warned you this was boring!) – and I thought okay, but that’s got me wanting to help you more! Have you worked out why you’re getting question marks and solved it? Or are you just ignoring them? And if so, I wanted to explain it rather than have you thinking something weird was going on with ‘Dot’ or with the web link. So then, ha ha, this is long isn’t it?
I thought yeah, must make it obvious it was me all along, give the info about Rowe and give you the chance to ask if you wish about the question marks. ....
Is this tortured or what? So when I was back in P mode and talking to Phoenix, I dropped in the Rowe stuff. Why did I include that quote about not being published in the US. Because it made me wonder? I’ve been so stuck in her books, and it’s been like reading my own thoughts from years ago. In fact, it’s been scary in that way. Like I’d buried everything. And I also thought I shouldn’t be agreeing with her, lock stock and barrel. I expect to disagree with every book I read somewhere along the line. If I don’t, I must be swallowing it whole, being gullible? That’s my thinking. And that quote about the US niggled me. Because people aren’t left to starve, I know that. But I was so stuck on her, I couldn’t see an alternative. I just thought it’s wrong, but why has she written that? To be clear, this book was published in 94. I can’t remember 10 years ago easily. But it still doesn’t make that quote okay. And then you told me the alternative – that she probably couldn’t get a contract. Simple and so obvious and logical! I couldn’t get to that. I was just stuck in ‘why?’. Which makes me wonder if I was making Rowe a mother in reading her. Coz now I can see all the times I was asking ‘why’ with mother. But I couldn’t use logic to get to the answer, because, well, you know the answer. What a great lesson! And maybe next time I’ll recognise that confusion? Hope so. (I'm guessing this is what my head did. Tough feedback welcome.)
And what did you do? Gave me a wonderful description of your reaction, how you see things and it’s great! But I wish I’d been upfront with the posts in the first place and I wish I’d said I was confused about that quote. To be honest, I couldn’t even *think* about the quote so I saved it for here in the hope that someone would decipher it for me. And you did. Thank you. I’m just sorry that you went to such lengths to respond because I wasn’t attacking the US, it was only after I posted I looked at it and thought maybe it was political. And it was, and it didn’t make sense.
I liked the story about the English teacher. Maybe she should have said “is it safe to walk that road at night?” I think we all have an idea of what that means. We all want to be safe and free! Hey some in the UK would say we’re not part of Europe at all and get quite worked up about the idea. Sovereignty and all that. Some would commute on the train to do their job in France or Belgium. Many of us would say we’re much, much closer in culture, economy and ideas to the US. Heck we’re all people. One of my favourite novelists is Canadian Margaret Atwood. ‘The handmaid’s tale’ made a big impression on me and it could have been written in a number of countries. I guess the story is more important than where it comes from. Yeah, that sounds good!
Enough for now and sorry for the long explanation and apologies for being Dot. Pretty dumb of me. Yep, it was. Going to read your post again! Thanks Flower. P
Hey all this motorbike stuff is making me envious.
I want one! I just wish we had some big open spaces to ride them. The crowded south east is not somewhere I’d recommend for bikes or peace of mind. We’re all pretty nuts down here and people drive like lunatics. I should know ha ha
