Voicelessness Board in ‘Cosmopolitan’ – article link

[Portia]

Thanks ukgirl for letting us know you found this board in Cosmopolitan magazine. I just bought a copy to share the article with everyone here.

I’ve scanned the 3 page article and put it on the following site. It’s from the UK December issue of Cosmopolitan, pages 117 to 120.

Read the article at: http://creating-love.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk

The pages are jpeg picture files. If you want to save them, right-click on the page picture and save picture as.

Once you’ve got them saved, you can view them in Windows picture viewer (just open them from Windows Explorer and viewer opens automatically). Then if they’re small to read, you can enlarge them with the magnifier. Just in case anyone needed to know that.

The address for this board is given on my page 3, in the green column, point number 3.

There are some typical quotes from Sam Vaknin on page 2.

Happy reading - and welcome to any more Cosmo readers who have joined us! P

[OnlyMe]

Thank you for taking the time to share this with the rest of us!  ! I was on my way to look for the mag, but wouldn't have found the UK edition way over here in small town Canada!

[phoenix]

Thank You Portia - I  almost was able to read the whole thing. I couldn't quite make out the green parts. I will check out the US version of Cosmo to see if they have the same article. I think I can get the UK copy, though, at the bookstore.

Boy have I fallen prey to this type if man! I was lucky though, I sensed something was wrong. I wasn't in love with him either. He just kept pursuing relentlesly, I finally thought, heck I'll see what 's here. It turned out later that he pursued me because at our first meeting I had looked so deeply into his eyes he took that as me being interested in him. Ultimately,he fell into his own trap. It still cost me alot of pain. I couldn't understand what was going on. He cheated as a sport. And lied.

In the end I was able to do considerable damage to him. But his next girlfreind totally took him down....he lost everything. And got old in the process. What a sad life. Once you got to know him you could see that he was really just a shell of a person - no substance and operating from a base of deep insecurity.  

I wonder what he is doing now? Seeking therapy, I hope.   Phoenix

[Portia]

I had a look to see what those scans are like to read – pretty bad huh?  If anyone wants a better copy, I might have a go at loading up half pages or something. Or just the bits that are most difficult to read.

Hey Only Me, I nearly fell over when I found myself reading about NPD in a UK mag – maybe we’re changing over here for the better?

Hi Phoenix, my fling with an N weirdo lasted 6 months and I feel ‘lucky’ too that I got myself out. Some base survival thing? I don’t know what it is that ‘snaps’ one day and says enough is enough and we get out. That overwhelming sudden realisation. Clarity. Wish I could bottle that! P

[BlueTopaz]

I don’t know what it is that ‘snaps’ one day and says enough is enough and we get out. That overwhelming sudden realisation. Clarity. Wish I could bottle that! P

Exxxxactly...   I often wonder the same for these kinds of things.  Some stay for mere months, others for several years (me!   ), and yet others for decades, before something changes inside like never before, and one says and means "no more" and leaves.

I know what I can share with people asking about the experience of ending such a relationship, but ask me how/why I came to that point precisely when I did, and not sooner or later, and I couldn't tell you.  

It would indeed be a valuable thing to know in terms of people repeating patterns and getting stuck once again, and in sharing with others on forums such as these...

BT

[bludie]

From what I could make out, this article was WONDERFUL. Thanks for taking the time to scan it in...if you do decide to post a larger copy of the article, I'd be interested!

This woman's experience is eerily reminiscent of mine...the not having a large enough smile to greet him was particularly creepy. One of the last rages my ex-NPD-fiance had was over "the look on my face" when he came down for his first cup of coffee that morning. Sigh.

This site, the INSIGHT and wonderful resources have truly been a life saver and explains so much of I've not only dealt with in my most recent relationship but a pattern that has existed much of my life beginning with my NPD Dad.

Many thanks to you all.

[ukgril]

im glad most of you found it interesting - and i only found the article on sunday (14/11/04) and then everything fell into place - i thought i was dreaming when i read it, that it wasnt real because i didnt beleive that it would be a know condition - or even a condition at all!!!
But im glad it was bought to light and that we can all relate to it, after all i spose we all endure the same feelings just different circumstances. xx