New T

[Twoapenny]

(((((((Tupp)))))))))))))))

This may sound like a crazy question.....when she acted as if she didn't believe you, did you challenge or confront her?  I know that is risky.  Just a thought or two.

Yep.  I was telling her about the police and social services investigations and the people involved (professionals) who lied, either to me or about me.  I was going through some examples and she said (of the police woman) "I think she was naïve, I don't think she was lying".  I gave her a couple more examples and she still said the same thing.  I've got written proof.  I've got records that were altered, reports that were changed as they were handed around different people, discrepancies in statements made by professionals - I've got proof that professionals involved lied.  My complaints were upheld, there were agencies that admitted that their records weren't factually accurate, one social worker admitted to me on the phone that she'd made something up.  I felt like I was talking to my mum, she was refusing to see what was in front of her.  I didn't have the actual paperwork with me but I feel like I shouldn't need to prove to a therapist that I'm telling the truth.  I've never lied about this stuff.  I wouldn't say someone was lying without proof, the reasons the hassles against me stopped were because I proved how many people involved had lied.  It's left me feeling so ill and uneasy.

I see what you mean.  I've also encountered therapists, on my side of the Pond, that simply cannot wrap their brains around the fact that this kind of stuff actually happens. 

I am aware I might be over reacting - I am incredibly sensitive about it, and I know that I'm jangling at the minute and even tiny things are setting me off.  And I know that dealing with 'it' is always tough, whichever way you go about it.  But I don't know, everything in me was screaming "don't go there with this one".  And I've ignored my instincts in the past and regretted it.  I've contacted a Rape and Sexual Abuse Centre and they have counsellors so I'm just waiting for someone to get back to me with an appointment - perhaps I need to go with someone who just deals with sexual abuse and only talk about that.  My mum still seems to sneak into everything else.  So I'll try that and see how it goes.

But thank you, Bones and Hops, for your thoughts.  I appreciate the fact that you care enough to say what I need to hear but might not want to.  Thank you xx

[BonesMS]

(((((((Tupp)))))))))))))))

This may sound like a crazy question.....when she acted as if she didn't believe you, did you challenge or confront her?  I know that is risky.  Just a thought or two.

Yep.  I was telling her about the police and social services investigations and the people involved (professionals) who lied, either to me or about me.  I was going through some examples and she said (of the police woman) "I think she was naïve, I don't think she was lying".  I gave her a couple more examples and she still said the same thing.  I've got written proof.  I've got records that were altered, reports that were changed as they were handed around different people, discrepancies in statements made by professionals - I've got proof that professionals involved lied.  My complaints were upheld, there were agencies that admitted that their records weren't factually accurate, one social worker admitted to me on the phone that she'd made something up.  I felt like I was talking to my mum, she was refusing to see what was in front of her.  I didn't have the actual paperwork with me but I feel like I shouldn't need to prove to a therapist that I'm telling the truth.  I've never lied about this stuff.  I wouldn't say someone was lying without proof, the reasons the hassles against me stopped were because I proved how many people involved had lied.  It's left me feeling so ill and uneasy.

I see what you mean.  I've also encountered therapists, on my side of the Pond, that simply cannot wrap their brains around the fact that this kind of stuff actually happens. 

I am aware I might be over reacting - I am incredibly sensitive about it, and I know that I'm jangling at the minute and even tiny things are setting me off.  And I know that dealing with 'it' is always tough, whichever way you go about it.  But I don't know, everything in me was screaming "don't go there with this one".  And I've ignored my instincts in the past and regretted it.  I've contacted a Rape and Sexual Abuse Centre and they have counsellors so I'm just waiting for someone to get back to me with an appointment - perhaps I need to go with someone who just deals with sexual abuse and only talk about that.  My mum still seems to sneak into everything else.  So I'll try that and see how it goes.

But thank you, Bones and Hops, for your thoughts.  I appreciate the fact that you care enough to say what I need to hear but might not want to.  Thank you xx

(((((((((((((((((((((Tupp)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[Twoapenny]

Thanks, Bonesie ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Bones)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I've made contact with a counsellor at the Rape Crisis centre.  Very nice lady, we've had a bit of a chat and she's going to put me on their waiting list.  There's a six month wait but once you're in it's indefinite (ie you can keep going for as long as you need to) and they ask for donations rather than charging a fixed fee so it's much easier for me financially.  I'd also contacted another local psychologist who I didn't see because her fees were too much for me to afford, but she's said she can negotiate them down if necessary so there's that as a back up.

A six month delay might be a good thing, I'm hoping to move house and am still wading through this blessed paperwork so with a bit of luck all of that will be done by then and out of the way (finally!).  We'll see what happens.

[BonesMS]

Thanks, Bonesie ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Bones)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I've made contact with a counsellor at the Rape Crisis centre.  Very nice lady, we've had a bit of a chat and she's going to put me on their waiting list.  There's a six month wait but once you're in it's indefinite (ie you can keep going for as long as you need to) and they ask for donations rather than charging a fixed fee so it's much easier for me financially.  I'd also contacted another local psychologist who I didn't see because her fees were too much for me to afford, but she's said she can negotiate them down if necessary so there's that as a back up.

A six month delay might be a good thing, I'm hoping to move house and am still wading through this blessed paperwork so with a bit of luck all of that will be done by then and out of the way (finally!).  We'll see what happens.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((Tupp))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[Hopalong]

((((Tupp)))

Could there possibly be any benefit to having one last appt. with the T and telling her
exactly what you said here--that her not affirming you when you said the
bureaucrat lied was so triggering to you want to leave therapy with her? And
that not being believed was what happened to you in the first place?

I just wonder if it could be a beneficial session, even if it's your last one....
I'm guessing she doesn't realize the impact of her comments about the civil
servants involved in your life, nor how those comments made you feel about
risking other, even more traumatic, information with her.

??? While you wait for those other appts?

xxoo
Hops

[Twoapenny]

((((Tupp)))

Could there possibly be any benefit to having one last appt. with the T and telling her
exactly what you said here--that her not affirming you when you said the
bureaucrat lied was so triggering to you want to leave therapy with her? And
that not being believed was what happened to you in the first place?

I just wonder if it could be a beneficial session, even if it's your last one....
I'm guessing she doesn't realize the impact of her comments about the civil
servants involved in your life, nor how those comments made you feel about
risking other, even more traumatic, information with her.

??? While you wait for those other appts?

xxoo
Hops

I don't feel like it's something I want to do, Hopsie.  It's quite a lot of money and two hours of my time.  There's no way I can talk to her now about what he did.  I'm happy to wait for the new appointments xx

[Hopalong]

Well it's good that you know what is right and wrong for you,
and that's important.

Good for you for knowing that, and for having a healthy boundary
(even here).

love,
Hops

[Twoapenny]

Well it's good that you know what is right and wrong for you,
and that's important.

Good for you for knowing that, and for having a healthy boundary
(even here).

love,
Hops

Thank you for caring (((((((((((((((((((Hops)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))