most narcissistic comments ever

[Anonymous]

Patz
Have you read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas?
Was HS Thompson a Narc or someone who didn't fit in with society? (Like many artists)

[Anonymous]

Guest:

Yeah, he was very much a "nonconformist" type person.  One of his joys was to go out in his bathrobe in the freezing winter and shoot his rifle.  He was not a tightly wrapped person ( no pun intended, lol), but other journalist, writers etc. loved him.  He thought himself in the pattern of Hemingway I guess.  Another artist (painter) was Sydney Pollack.  Very talented, but also very troubled.  Patz

[October]

My N-H gets mad and he knows how I don't get along with my N-Mother,

He will say I'm a Wh##e, like my mother

onlyrenting

My ex used to call  me a sl*t, and other similar nasty stuff, none of it remotely true.  More to do with his fantasies of what women are like, I think.  He also said I wanted to k*ll him, which is when I got very concerned and made him leave.   Didn't like the sound of that one at all.

(((((((onlyrenting)))))))

[onlyrenting1]

All of you responding on my behalf is so very touching to me.
Longtire, I do believe looking at it as an adventure is fun. going out of state on my own is scary and I don't want to risk danger so I will be looking for saftey nets  before I head off.

Mudpuppy, you sound very kind to offer help to get me out of here.
I'm going to get some tax money back any day and I will be on my way.

..."may God reward him according to his works

We all make choices, Knowing you have done or said something hurtful is not rocket science.
It can be even more hurtful when My-H can quote so much of the bible, but not apply it to his life.

Today I get home from work.
My H is telling me, be sure and not contact him and it's good I will be in another State.
He then tells me he will be demanding a blood test to check me for
Bi-bolar.  I have mental problems and not fit to raise a child.

I asked him if he believes I have problems and he does not ? He claims the doctors take his blood all the time and they would have noted it.
I don't believe they check for this unless there is a reason.

He has no Idea I have his Medical report on his Self-absorbed N Diagonosis. I have never told him he is N, only because It would do no good. He would make remarks that I think he has a problem and it would make him more hostile.

He claims he has no problems, maybe selfish, but that's it.
I don't believe he understands his medical report and what it means to those understanding all of the behaviors that play along with being an N.
I was only being on this site here that I even understood.

He told me to take every thing we have, It's not much but just the same as things are moved out I want it clear I expect to take my daughters bed and few things with out conflict.

He is talking about divorce and knowing I want to leave, it sounding odd, how he plans on coming back with ideas of me having to be tested to be able to take care of our daughter.

Lots to think about. one thing on my mind. the boat has left the dock.

onlyrenting

[Anonymous]

Hi Onlyrenting:

He then tells me he will be demanding a blood test to check me for
Bi-bolar. I have mental problems and not fit to raise a child.

Just another last ditch threat to scare you into thinking you could lose your daughter, if you leave him.  Another attempt to control you with fear.

Don't buy it.  You know you're fit to raise your daughter and he is not.

You're sound calm, which is good.  He's trying to razzle you.  You are a strong woman and I admire you!

..."may God reward him according to his works."

Oh Mudpuppy!  Thankyou for quoting this line!  It's so appropriate!

Re feeling ashamed for your gender:  It's not your gender's fault.  The shame of one sick puppy doesn't belong to you or your gender.  Maybe you will consider stopping trying to collect on his works???!!! (heehee Just kidding around a bit here).

GFN

[vunil]

I asked him if he believes I have problems and he does not ? He claims the doctors take his blood all the time and they would have noted it.
I don't believe they check for this unless there is a reason.

He wants to control you so badly he is making things up!  There is no blood test for mental conditions like bipolar.  

If it is possible, I would suggest not talking to him about any of this, to the extent that you can avoid it.  He seems very willing to pull out all of the stops to try to get you to stay, and in the long run will hurt your feelings with something or other that he says-- why let him?  If you can, try to talk to him as if he were someone you work with, someone you are cordial with but not particularly involved with emotionally, someone with whom you have to work out some details but who is otherwise not a part of your life.  

When he says all of this mental illness stuff, just say "la la la" in your head and smile.  Better yet, agree with him.  This is advice someone here gave me, and it works well.  


Good luck!

[Anonymous]

onlyrenting,
Being the typical oblivious guy I can't tell whether you feel safe in this move or not. If not I hope you take the precaution of having friends around when it occurs at all times. You are in our prayers. I also hope you will stay in contact after the move.
 
vunil,

When he says all of this mental illness stuff, just say "la la la" in your head and smile. Better yet, agree with him. This is advice someone here gave me, and it works well.

I think there are only two ways to sever a relationship with an N. Hit them in the nose as hard as you can(figuratively) so they go find a victim less painful to deal with, or do what you said. Feed them and stroke them and lull them to sleep so their guard is down, all the while planning your moves. Anything else is playing their game and we lose that game every time.

GFN

Re feeling ashamed for your gender: It's not your gender's fault. The shame of one sick puppy doesn't belong to you or your gender. Maybe you will consider stopping trying to collect on his works???!!!

I know its not my fault for that kind of behavior, but it's just hard to take somebody saying that to his wife. It kind of boils the hurt these "sick puppies" cause right down to its essence. Onlyrenting sounds like such a sweetie it really ticks me off to read something like that. I couldn't imagine saying that to my wife.  
 
mudpuppy

[onlyrenting1]

Mudpup,

I'm not a regular traveler and have a better felling now knowing I plan on driving behind another employee transferring to the same area in Dallas.
What  lucky break for me. Expect this around the 9th.

I think there are only two ways to sever a relationship with an N. Hit them in the nose as hard as you can(figuratively) so they go find a victim less painful to deal with, or do what you said. Feed them and stroke them and lull them to sleep so their guard is down, all the while planning your moves. Anything else is playing their game and we lose that game every time.

I have a young daughter so keeping peace is vital, keeping his guard down is best for all. I agree with you on your thoughts.

I worry how doing all of this under their nose may not be possible without conflict.  the driving away is going to be so painful. I just don't know an easy way to make it all happen without making it feel like I've hit him hard in the nose.

I know its not my fault for that kind of behavior, but it's just hard to take somebody saying that to his wife. It kind of boils the hurt these "sick puppies" cause right down to its essence. Onlyrenting sounds like such a sweetie it really ticks me off to read something like that. I couldn't imagine saying that to my wife.

[/quote]

Thanks for your concern. Being a woman expecting your husband to behave with the basics, to protect and nurture, it used to happen, but with age and health problems, not so much anymore

I used to cry about it but have gone numb.  he gets none of my emotion, I have gone stone to the words and have not cried in years.

I will only respond to kindness, but even then from an N it means they want their N-supply to fatten up so they can suck your emotions dry,
I know, now this is what the kindness is about for the N.

Trusting may be difficult in the future, but I will know the differance between an N-kindness and whatever else is a real kindness.
like what I find here on this board, It is always consistant and this is reasurring. Mud- your great for the warm and fuzzy feeling. Thanks.



onlyrenting

[Anonymous]

Dearest Only:

Glad to see that things are proceeding for you.  As far as you being bipolar (?) what a hoot!  He is projecting.  I don't think you can have a blood test for being bipolar!  The only thing they can test for is the seretoin levels which represent a certain level of stress.  Now that might be off the chart for you right now!  The only way they can "test" for being bipolar, schzoid, borderline, paranoid, psychotic etc.  is for an intake at a psychiatric facility or ER conducted by professionals who see these things on a 24-7 basis.  I should know I use to work on a psych unit.  

Also glad to see that you will be following another individual to D.  That should provide a certain level of comfort.  Will you have a cell phone in case you have an emergency?  It might be wise to notify the authorities the date you are going to leave just in case there might be a "melt down" on his part when you pulling away. Since you have notified them of his intent, this might be an added precaution.  Just my 2c. Mudpuppy might have some ideas on this.  My thoughts are with you and your daughter.  Patz

[Anonymous]

Onlyrenting,
I think you understood that my suggestion of friends around is not so much for emotional support, but your and your daughter's physical safety. My N is a physical coward, but not all are. And not all who are historcally non-violent stay that way. I am not trying to scare you or raise your stress level just trying to make sure you protect yourself. the best way to lower stress is to know you have covered all the bases. Ns seldom allow themselves to "meltdown" as patz said with third parties around. If he does melt (brings up visions of the wicked witch doesn't it? if only we could just throw water on them ) it would probably be after you were gone. Also, if you have any concern about him following you it would not be a bad idea to carelessly leave a map, with your route highlighted, laying around where he could find it. You of course in reality would be taking a completely different route. Everything patz said is smart. A cellphone is vital. I don't know the size of your town or whether Mr. N has a history with the local coppers but it is very smart to let them know what is going on, especially if you have any contacts within the force or DA's office.
Another idea, if you are truly concered, might be getting yourself completely prepared, letting him know you are leaving on such and such a day and then leaving a couple of days earlier, or staying with a friend until the day arrives. They like to stage their theatrics, so if they have a certain date to plan for you can definitely use that to your advantage and catch them off guard. If you are comfortable enough that he is not dangerous then you can play it safe and not be so sneaky. I just have no trust in the stability of anyone who is truy an N. But you know him and I don't.
A lot of people here will be with you in spirit as you prepare for and make this move. And be prepared for some pretty strong emotions not only when you move but after you arrive. Keep in touch. Godspeed.

PS. Maybe your lucky break was divine providence. Maybe.

Mudpuppy

[Anonymous]

Hey, back to the original topic for a minute; I just remembered one from my bro.
"Mom just failed her stress test. Of course that has nothing to do with your despicable behavior."
This was an e-mail from him to me. Our mom has a history of heart disease. I begged them both to keep her out of our conflict but neither listened. Here's the topper. Two days after failing her stress test he has his mommy at a super stressful meeting where he's trying to regain control of a non profit he resigned from. So much for his concern for her health. Lets see... hmmmm, a dead mom in trade for him getting his way. Easy call. Moms are a dime a dozen, my brother is unique. God I hope they broke the mold anyway.

mudpuppy

[Lara]

I hope so too Mudpuppy.

Here are some quotes from my ex:

' Yes I have betrayed you again but there's nothing I can do about it.'


'That's the first time you haven't cheered me up;in fact you're making me feel worse.'


One day when he was giving me a monologue on one of his pet topics, and I told him he was repeating himself:
'Who else is going to listen to me if you don't?'


And when my father died, my ex gave me a sympathy card;inside he wrote,
'Dear Lara, I'VE been a wonderful daughter.'

[shixie]

On an episode of Coach, Hayden said "I'll be a family all by myself"

[Brigid]

After spending 30 minutes telling my husband what I thought of him, how he is an empty shell, has no empathy, etc., etc.,  his response was "So if I just came back to you everything would be fine?"  My response was "Are you f_ _ _ _ ing nuts?"  (That was a rhetorical question)

A great one from one of the women in my support group was her ex's response to her fear of find a lump in her breast.  "You won't have anything wrong with you, nothing bad ever happens to me."

[Anonymous]

These N responses are so hilarious they are sad.  Contradictory statements.........just like n's.  They really and truly don't know how stupid they sound.  It is amazing. Patz