An unanswered question

[mum]

In case there is some confusion: by "faith" I mean whatever that means to everyone.  I know there are a lot of Christians posting here, but I don't want anyone to think I meant ONE "faith" in particular, although I understand that might be the case for many, and for that I am happy.
  My own "faith" is non denomenational, I guess, actually I am not really sure, as putting a title on it doesn't make any sense to me. I just don't want anyone to feel my little speech on faith had any religious overtone, as I certainly would not want be exclusive.  WE are ALL equal souls, whatever path we walk.

[Brigid]

In case there is some confusion: by "faith" I mean whatever that means to everyone. I know there are a lot of Christians posting here, but I don't want anyone to think I meant ONE "faith" in particular, although I understand that might be the case for many, and for that I am happy.

I hope that we don't always need to put a disclaimer on our postings regarding faith, belief, God, Jesus, spiritual guidance, etc., etc.  I hope that we are all accepting and understanding of each other's beliefs and we can feel free to express what those beliefs are for us personally without worrying about offending someone else.  One of my pet peeves is the political correctness that our world revolves around and so many people looking for ways to be offended rather than just accepting that everyone can have their own opinions and beliefs and should be able to express them freely.

I am not criticizing what you said, Mum, but just wish you didn't feel the need to say it.

Brigid

[mum]

Brigid, thanks, and no, I did not feel criticized.  I also wish I didn't feel the need to say it, but that is not the fault of the board, or society, but only my own nuerosis about ever "offending" anyone.....(still working on not apologizing for my own voice!)  The"PC ness" of this society just sort of feeds my own self doubt at times.  I'm really glad you pointed that out.

[Anonymous]

GFN and October:

I remember I had been reading from the "Living Bible" and the N happen to come in.  He was an avowed agnostic.......he  just pointed at my Bible and just laughed.  He then began to ridicule my faith and that it was something that someone had made up.  His riduicule of something that I held dear really hurt.  I still remember the smirk on his face.  Patz

[Anonymous]

Good morning everyone:

Hey Mum:

Thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot coming from one who I always thought to be such an enlightened soul.. thank you again.

I'm not sure I'm such an enlightened soul but thankyou for saying so and you are quite welcome to and deserve many, many kind words Mum!!

My most unwise choices have been made in moments where I have lost faith. My best have been made with giant leaps of faith.

And you're not the only one!  As you say, there are so many kinds of faith..faith in self, people, chance, etc.

Even though I feel as if my faith in God has not wavered, I admit that I have lost faith in myself, in others, and many other kinds of faith, sometimes.  It is very comforting to know that I am not the only one.

Gaining back each kind of faith is a challenge but something that does much good.  It's definately work but so worth it!

Hiya Patz:

He then began to ridicule my faith and that it was something that someone had made up.

What a turd!!

His riduicule of something that I held dear really hurt.

And so it would and so he knew it would and so he took advantage and hurt to his heart's content!!!  

Makes me wanna hurl when I think of all the pain those who behave so Nish cause.  I know we all behave a bit Nish sometimes but it's the clear intent to cause deep harm that I find so revolting.

Cruel intentions.....that's what prevails in these people and what really jabs eh?

I guess as we learn to put up walls to all that and deflect it back in their faces, or walk away from it, or let it wash over us, like water off a duck, or let it pass through us, without letting it stick, or whatever way we are learning to evacuate this crap from our systems......we become like filters.....trying to pick out the thick sh#$%^t, so we can flush it, and allow the mirky rest to flow down the drain.
  (sorry....that was kind of vivid).

The thing is.....he can think, say, do what he wants about your core beliefs.....and so can you.  And Patz, it's easy to see that he did not win.  He did not destroy those beliefs or even shake them up.

 GFN

[Anonymous]

Patz,

he just pointed at my Bible and just laughed. He then began to ridicule my faith and that it was something that someone had made up.

You know why he laughed? Because the bible doesn't say;
"In the beginning (fill in the name of your own personal N here) created the heavens and the earth."
Since the bible doesn't say they're God they know its make believe.  

Brigid and mum,
I agree with you both. I am never offended when someone shares their Buddihst beliefs or Native American shamans or astrology or even atheism. So how come I'm always worried about giving offense if I mention my faith, and always feel it needs a disclaimer like mum does? Are we just being polite or have we been trained by our Ns?

mudpup

[Stormchild Guesting]

I think there have been some loud, intolerant, hatemongers claiming to be Christians, who have given the rest of us a bad name.

Some people literally twitch when I tell them what my faith is... others start throwing things (verbally). It's really sad.

I think once you've experienced that, you learn to be very gentle when broaching the subject.

[Anonymous]

Hello All:

Thanks for the reply.  My ex N was really cruel.  Not cruel phyiscally but emotionally.  Anything that I held dear was subject to ridicule.  It would be nothing for him to ridicule people and how they lived their lives.  He would just look at me and say "It is truly unbelievable how stupid these people are."  It was as if he had the answers to everything.  Toward the end he would take any opportunity to make me feel less than.  

I can really relate on the other thread under suicide where the person posting feels there is no light at the end of the tunnel.  There would be days, weeks that would go by that was a fog.  The only thing that would make me get up in the morning was getting my son to school.  

It is only through my faith that I was able to get through.  I am sure there are others posting here of other faiths and beliefs and that is all acceptable.  What is not acceptable is someone attacking your core beliefs and not making room for you.  There is room for all, love for all.

On another note:

I went to my hair salon the other day and my poor hairdresser is married to an ultimate N.  I have given her different links.  Hopefully she will look those up and I plan to give her this site so she can post.  Just keep her in your prayers as she has gone through a lot of physical suffering as in operations and health issues.  Instead of going to the hosptial the N goes out with the "guys" while she is in surgery.  So pray for her.  Love Patz

[October]

You talk about your daughter a lot, and you really sound like an incredible mom.  I wonder if, like me, it's your child that keeps you alive.

I think if she had not come along I might never have realised the truth about what is around me.  I am happy to put up with whatever comes along, but I am not happy for her to have the same.  

Looking after her helps me stay grounded in reality, and now she is turning into a teenager I think it is great to see how normal and natural she is - ie terrible at times.  I think abused children often do not have the freedom to be teenagers.  I went straight from age 8 to adult, as far as I remember.  

Yes, she keeps me going.  And when she leaves to make her own life, it will be very difficult for me, but it will be the right thing to do.  Then I might just pack a bag and walk the Himalayas or something.  

[October]

What is it about dark?   I always turned off all the lights, after my kids went to bed, back then, after he was finally gone.  I was nicer to myself than you though, October and Mum.  I sat in a cozy lounge chair, in the corner and rocked.

I did pray a lot between crying and I know that helped keep me from totally losing it.  (Thankyou God).

GFN

Dark is safe.  And nobody can see me.  

I lost my faith in people, bit by bit, after this time, as I turned to one source of help after another and failed to explain properly what I wanted.  But God was always there.  Or rather, the angels were.     No people, just angels.

[October]

He was an avowed agnostic.......he  just pointed at my Bible and just laughed.  He then began to ridicule my faith and that it was something that someone had made up.  His riduicule of something that I held dear really hurt.  I still remember the smirk on his face.  Patz

Picture the Day of Judgement.  N stands before the Throne.  Then Our Lord points at him, and just laughs.  And you are free to join in with him, if you want to.  

[Anonymous]

Then I might just pack a bag and walk the Himalayas or something.  

Something to look forward to, October!!!    Either walking around and looking at their glory from that perspective, or climbing to the top to get a glimpse of those magnificent views!!!

But I bet you'll be back, often, and stay available to be the loving, welcoming grandmother, for your grandchildren, that your mother wasn't for your child.

Picture the Day of Judgement. N stands before the Throne. Then Our Lord points at him, and just laughs. And you are free to join in with him, if you want to.    

You crack me up sometimes!!      

GFN

[Butterfly]

Hey there, GFN!

I'm going to give your idea of "planning ahead" a try.  I think the idea is practical and doable for me and how it can be effectively incorporated on a daily basis.  Thanks for your suggestion.

I hope that we don't always need to put a disclaimer on our postings regarding faith, belief, God, Jesus, spiritual guidance, etc., etc. I hope that we are all accepting and understanding of each other's beliefs and we can feel free to express what those beliefs are for us personally without worrying about offending someone else.

Ditto  

I feel the same way, Brigid.  

I feel there is so much I can learn from you guys here on this board.  And for that, I'm grateful.  You guys have gone through so much.  I'm not sure if I'm one of the youngest ppl on this board.  I kinda feel I am.   Thanks for having me on board.

[Anonymous]

I'm going to give your idea of "planning ahead" a try. I think the idea is practical and doable for me and how it can be effectively incorporated on a daily basis. Thanks for your suggestion.

Now yur talkin' Butterfly!!!  And you're very welcome too.

It might take awhile but it will probably help.  Best of luck!!

Thanks for having me on board.

Thanks for being here.  Sometimes I think of all of our voices as trying to learn a difficult piece of music.  It ain't easy and it takes time and patience and great effort but I really believe we will all sing some day!!!

GFN

[Brigid]

Butterfly,

I'm not sure if I'm one of the youngest ppl on this board. I kinda feel I am. Thanks for having me on board.

We love having you here, but always, always remember, age before beauty.   You can interpret that however you wish.

Brigid