Movie: Madea's Family Reunion...very good depiction of NARCISSISM!

[reallyME]

I was wondering if any of you got a chance to see Madea's Family Reunion?  I watched it tonight and just had to tell you all that it depicts NPD VERY ACCURATELY not only in male form but in female form, through the mother in it (may be triggering to some, I'm sure, so be careful).  It was very realistic and well done, and in the end...well, you might want to watch and find out how the narcissists are dealt with.

[WRITE]

I watched this movie with my son a few months ago, we were about the only people who didn't find it very funny, and when we were leaving he turned to me and said 'lot of mixed messages in there mum' ( referring to all the various forms of violence, some which were meant to be amusing I guess )

I should be in bed, I have to be up in less than 6 hours!

[reallyME]

WRITE,

I couldn't agree with you MORE on this one. 

Although the scenes of the guy beating on the girl were done realistically, and showed the "badness" of domestic violence, it did not make it right for the lady to beat the abuser and scald him either in the end.  I don't see where those two wrongs made a right at all!

I was just saying that, regarding the mother and the abusive husband, the movie really defined what narcissism is all about...the mother even said "I gave you EVERYTHING!" to the daughter that she let her husband molest years before that.  She told the daughter that she bought her the best clothes, sent her to the best schools, got her into every program or whatever...it was that "after all I've done for YOU!"  What the daughter couldn't forget, that colored her life, was what the mother did TO HER, not FOR her.  Children need LOVE, trust, security, not mainly the best of material things.  If they can have lots of those attributes and less of the other, all the better.   I speak from experience.

Just my own view on things.

~Laura

[WRITE]

To be honest I didn't see much past all the violence, I am really sensitive to that and wouldn't have watched it if I'd known, and especially the comedy grandmother figure who would not produce nearly so many lawyers as criminals if you want my opinion! The whole thing was sickly sentimental, and a poor examination of life's worst abuses. The only redeeming thing for me was my son's healthful response, though all around me grown guys were guffawing and clapping.

The Medea character seems to amuse most people, I am often out of step with popular culture though.

Children need LOVE, trust, security, not mainly the best of material things.  If they can have lots of those attributes and less of the other, all the better

yes you're right. Though I think my parenting life has been easier too because money has been plenty, and we've indulged him in extra-curicular sports and music etc
It must be hard here for people with no insurance or spare money: even going to church is expensive!

[Hops]

Write, so glad you mentioned the expenses of church.
It's a little thing, just an irritant, but I live in a very well-to-do town and it just seems "natural" that for every single meeting there's an expectation of potluck or bringing refreshments. If you've very involved, it does get expensive. If you don't have time to cook you have to buy something. Finally at one meeting I said, please we're meeting after dinner at 7:00, may I ask why we need "snacks" right after dinner, it adds another rushed errand after an 8-9 hour day...etc, etc.
The tougher part is a feeling of humiliation about money, but add up two dinners and a couple meetings a month, bringing something to feed 8 people at each, and it really can add up. It bugs me that there's an assumption about people's time and money, because it's so nice and symbolic to share food. True, that is nice...but not every time there are 3 or more people.
Not to mention my pledge.

(Ahh. That was refreshing. If pointless.)    Thanks for mentioning it, Write.

Hops

[WRITE]

well it's something does occur to me, I mean if i joined a Baptist Church I'd be expected to tithe 10 %, there's even a nice little chart on most church websites!

But just being asked to donate every other day, and on Sundays; and it's the same with school too.

It's something in the forefront of my mind as I will have to live on a tight budget for a while until my son is old enough I can really get into work ( I have no doubt in my mind his father wouldn't entertain cutting down his working schedule- he's been going to work at 10 or 11 and returning home at 7 for years even though it doesn't fit with our family! When I mentioned that I won't be able to work full-time unless he changes his routine his answer was 'use childcare' even though my son hated daily daycare after a while and we took him out after a few weeks )

I suppose for pot-lucks it's ok to take along a jello/jelly or stick of french bread? Easy and cheap. Or some baked beans dressed up with barbecue sauce. But yup, like so many things:
irritating when unnecessary!

( sorry for the side-issue RM )