Leah: Have you read the book The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse? We had an employee that was wrapped up in an extremely controlling (guess what? Narcissistic ) church. This church actually has people give up everything and move into somewhat of a commune......a nice one...............but still............the ladies don't cut their hair. They are pentecostal, judgmental, etc. I, too, felt like I was abused by legalism. There was no grace growing up. Just a list of do's and don'ts..........But somehow I landed with a faith in God. My brother, on the other hand, doesn't have much time for any religion. He even cannot distinquish between religion and Christianity. Well, he was burned by my nmom and a couple of judgmental evangelists.........."God will wipe that smirk off your face, boy!!"