Is It Always N Behavior to Violate Others' Boundaries?

[BonesMS]

I had a strange dream last night!

I dreamt I was hanging out with The Traveling Wilburys in the recording studio.  They started performing the song "Last Night" and were making up lyrics that poked fun at Narcissistic Rage-aholic NWomb-Donors that had me giggling!!!!     Then one of them turned on the radio and guess what was playing?  "Last Night", with the FUNNY lyrics!!!!!  I laughed so hard I woke myself up!!!!!

Bones

(I wish I could remember the lyrics!!!!!)

[BonesMS]

Check out the last letter in Dear Abby:

http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20091231

What would you do?

Bones

[Anastasia]

I don't have the time this morning to read this thread and just looked at the title, but if it is an Nparent you are talking about, from my experience, you HAVE NO boundaries.  You are their possession and a total reflection of them.  So, yes, N's always violate other's boundaries in my opinion.

[BonesMS]

I don't have the time this morning to read this thread and just looked at the title, but if it is an Nparent you are talking about, from my experience, you HAVE NO boundaries.  You are their possession and a total reflection of them.  So, yes, N's always violate other's boundaries in my opinion.

Thanks, Anastasia.

It's not just an Nparent...it is ANYONE who is an N!!!!!

Bones

[BonesMS]

After reading TwoAPenny's account of the way the police scr*wed her over, I'm having flash-backs to what the NWhore did to me when I went to court to stop the abuse once and for all!!!!  Those A$$h*les, (i.e. the prosecutor's office) BELIEVED HER WITHOUT BOTHERING TO SPEAK TO ME AT ALL AND REFUSED TO PROCEED WITH THE CASE!!!!!  DAMN THEM ALL!!!!!!!!!!!     May they ALL BURN AND ROT IN H3LL!!!!!

Bones

[Ami]

You are a fighter (((((Bones)))) !    xxoo  Ami

[BonesMS]

You are a fighter (((((Bones)))) !    xxoo  Ami

Thanks, ((((((((((((((Ami))))))))))))))))))))))

Bones

[HeartofPilgrimage]

Bones, About that last letter in Dear Abby, I would tell. I am now dealing with narcissistic in-laws of my son, and it would be an extreme relief if the affected people had a diagnosis and if other members of their family understood what was going on. The main way to keep a narcissist in check is for everybody else to communicate.

Of course, I think there is likely something out-of-whack with the young man mentioned in the letter too, that he is involved with a young woman already diagnosed with NPD at age 20. Which means that the parents of the young woman should be prepared that the news they bring to him and his family might not be received warmly. They might get jumped on. But I still would tell.

For those of you that have been involved with someone with NPD, I am not implying that everybody that gets involved with a narcissist has problems of their own. I just mean that if you are attracted to a narcissist, your own parents are more likely to have been narcissists ... and so, the family of this young man might have similar problems to the girlfriend.

I find it curious that the writer of the letter is the parent of a young woman who has already been diagnosed with NPD at age 20. I wish I could know more about the writer, as well as what their parenting techniques/practices were. If the parents are not Ns, I wonder what factored into this young woman being so N that she already has a diagnosis. My observation is that very few Ns ever get a diagnosis because they don't think there's anything wrong with them, they are perfectly happy as long as the world revolves around them, and those in distress are those in relationship with them.

I have seen articles suggesting that NPD is exploding among the younger generation --- and unfortunately my generation has to shoulder a lot of the blame. My generation seemed to think that setting reasonable limits on their children was unreasonable, and that giving their kids everything without the kids having to work for anything or even WAIT for it was being a good parent.

So, maybe even if neither parent is an N, mistaken ideas about what it means to treat your children well could conceivably produce N kids. I guess.

[BonesMS]

Bones, About that last letter in Dear Abby, I would tell. I am now dealing with narcissistic in-laws of my son, and it would be an extreme relief if the affected people had a diagnosis and if other members of their family understood what was going on. The main way to keep a narcissist in check is for everybody else to communicate.

Of course, I think there is likely something out-of-whack with the young man mentioned in the letter too, that he is involved with a young woman already diagnosed with NPD at age 20. Which means that the parents of the young woman should be prepared that the news they bring to him and his family might not be received warmly. They might get jumped on. But I still would tell.

For those of you that have been involved with someone with NPD, I am not implying that everybody that gets involved with a narcissist has problems of their own. I just mean that if you are attracted to a narcissist, your own parents are more likely to have been narcissists ... and so, the family of this young man might have similar problems to the girlfriend.

I find it curious that the writer of the letter is the parent of a young woman who has already been diagnosed with NPD at age 20. I wish I could know more about the writer, as well as what their parenting techniques/practices were. If the parents are not Ns, I wonder what factored into this young woman being so N that she already has a diagnosis. My observation is that very few Ns ever get a diagnosis because they don't think there's anything wrong with them, they are perfectly happy as long as the world revolves around them, and those in distress are those in relationship with them.

I have seen articles suggesting that NPD is exploding among the younger generation --- and unfortunately my generation has to shoulder a lot of the blame. My generation seemed to think that setting reasonable limits on their children was unreasonable, and that giving their kids everything without the kids having to work for anything or even WAIT for it was being a good parent.

So, maybe even if neither parent is an N, mistaken ideas about what it means to treat your children well could conceivably produce N kids. I guess.

Thanks, HeartofPilgrimage.

Sometimes I wonder what else lies under letters like that?

Bones

[BonesMS]

While reorganizing and clearning my home, I came across a hard copy of this article that I found in 2006:

http://www.creators.com/advice/annies-mailbox/annie-s-mailbox-january-22.html

At the time I read this, I did not know about Narcissism.  Looking at it again, knowing what I know, it's mind-boggling!!!!

Bones

[BonesMS]

A little while ago, I was on a web chat with the Diane Rehm Show.  One of the topics that came up was Spasmodic Dysphonia, a neurological condition that attacks the vocal cords.  Ms. Rehm was diagnosed with it back in the late 1990's and is still being treated for it.  As I read some background information on her, I was struck by the fact that her late mother was very abusive towards her and often told her to "shut up", thereby forbidding her from having ANY voice as a child!  (The mother sounds like an N!)  The coincidence of Ms. Rehm being forbidden to have a voice as a child and her current battle with Spasmodic Dysphonia makes me wonder if there is a connection somewhere?

Bones

[Ami]

Hi (((Bones))))
  How are you ,today?                 xxxooo   Ami

[BonesMS]

Hi (((Bones))))
  How are you ,today?                 xxxooo   Ami

Hi, (((((((((((Ami)))))))))))).

I've been working on de-cluttering and it's exhausting.  The bf, being a typical male, mainly flaps his gums and doesn't help much until I start raising my voice at him!

Bones

[Ami]

Oh (((Bonesie))))  I am going on a trip for a few days with no internet  access so if I don't write that is why.    xxxooo  Ami

[BonesMS]

Oh (((Bonesie))))  I am going on a trip for a few days with no internet  access so if I don't write that is why.    xxxooo  Ami

I understand.

Thanks, (((((((((((Ami)))))))))))))

Bones