I was going to post this yesterday, but time got away from me. I wanted to post this because I haven't been on the boards quite as much lately, and quite honestly, I just feel darn good. I really can't remember the last time I felt this good, in fact. Here is what I've accomplished/learned in the last week or so.
-- I realized driving into work this morning that for the first time in years, I'm actually looking forward to a holiday. I'm spending Thanksgiving with my brother. I've promised pecan pie and homemade bread. My parents might be there too. But you know what, the anxiety I've felt in regard to seeing or talking them has started to subside. I think I could face them and not be drug down by a verbal assault from my mom. So, if they're there, and my mom makes some snarky comment, I'm just going to say, "You've already made up your mind about what I think and feel, so there's no point in me trying to defend myself. If you want to communicate with me you need to make an effort too. You need to stop looking for boogeymen under every bush and let me live my life. I've been doing pretty well, and I like my new life. If you don't, then maybe you don't need to be a part of it.
-- M and I rearranged his room so that the center of floor is now open, and there's room for him to play. Before, there wasn't really enough room for him to play. We cleaned up his desk and talked about what kinds of things he'd like to put on his walls. He still doesn't have any pictures, because now he can't decide. The room looks nice, and he's making an effort to keep it cleaned up.
-- I made soup for the first time yesterday. It was just a little spicy and filling, although I think I cooked it too long.
-- Against my better judgement, M and I went to movie night at school to see Ratatouille. I really wasn't looking forward to it, because I knew it was going to be a bad movie and an equally bad viewing experience. The movie wasn't bad, the ice cream was good, and the viewing experience just as bad as I'd expected. Where else can you get snacks and a movie for $7 though?
-- I have not felt depressed or anxious for days. I don't know if it's the medicine, or if it's just an improvement on my situation. Or a combination.
-- M and I got through a whole weekend with almost no fighting. Although getting up for school this morning was a challenge.
-- And I got my raise and promotion finally! And all of the back pay is going to be added to my check in a lump sum. An unexpected windfall, right when I needed it most.