Not Asking for Help/Not knowing Where/ Not knowing it’s There

[isittoolate]

hi all

This is just an example, and I sometimes might be boring, but my age shows that things can slide by in anybody’s life.

I didn’t know and no one told me 38 years ago, to what I was entitled under my Health Care Program.

Since seeing my therapist and she said it was neglect for me not to have counseling immediately after the car crash. I was left to my own thinking about my future with my daughter and…….I cannot even remember my fears.

Well all of us who were neglected by our parents understand neglect!

Now with this broken leg, I have been brought to the attention of Home Care by the Ortho Dr. ( I telephoned this place at the beginning, but unfortunately mentioned housework--no go!)

I have had the cast removed and had a reaction to some Cream given to me for dry skin, for cleaning up the skin under the cast. It broke out in bumps, blisters and bleeding. That was  just last week and the Dr. saw it this past Monday. He ordered Home Care.

I have nurses regarding the healing of my leg, but for the first time ever I have a “how are you living and moving about” therapist. (In Ontario we called them physical therapists and counselors.) This part was left out in 1970 when I went home.

She checked my living quarters, my transfers, said they were good, and her eyebrows went up so high they disappeared when she saw me transfer into the tub, but is going to install a pole for safety’s sake, install a riser on the toilet, said I wear the wrong shoes, more on that next visit, and built me a proper pile of pillows for my leg (have 7 pillows in my bed now)

The occupational therapist loaned me a pair of soft, soft, soft, booties to wear around the house. (Sponko Boots) as, believe it or not, my feet are not to be on the footrests. I have to take extra calcium and Vit. D. She wants 2 non-slip mats in the bathroom and I am to lie down, leg raised, 2-3 x per day. (been doing it only in the afternoons when I was tired, then all night.)

Said this swelling might not go down for a year!  Ouch! And that my leg appears not to have been set right.

Oh good and bad, but at least knowledgeable opinions.

I value my solitude and it is being invaded, but is for my own good. I guess things will be a little different for a while, and am still wondering how I can manage the 2-3 lie-downs per day--feels lazy.

Izzy

EDIT] One was taking pictures to take back to her boss and others. To get a picture of the larger sore on my heel she looked baffled, so I'm in my chair and shot my leg straight up in the air and the sore was just at the right height for her to photograph. She said, "Oh MY!"}

[Hopalong]

Oh Izz.
I am sorry it will take so long for your inflamed leg to be soothed.

But I am SO glad you're getting some proper in-home attention.

ALL of those things, and especially the calcium and lie-downs (hey, start meditating!) sound so valuable.

You do have a minor loss of privacy but you ARE a precious member of the human community and it's good to think of the community flowing in to help you help yourself.

xo
Hops

[changing]

Oh Izzy-

I am so glad that there has finally been some responsible action taken in your case. The complications of casts too high, sores, scars, swelling and such are just unconscionable-GRRRRRRRR to the "health care providers" who created/allowed such things!!!!! I hope that your new regimen will assist in proper healing and the alleviation of those problems. I use pillows and a special item for my leg and foot to elevate them- it really does help to mitigate swelling. I am aware of this especially when I don't do this-sleep on the floor, etc. I hope that you gain more comfort and healing now Sweetie.

The title of your post says it all- not asking, not knowing where or that it's there- health care has become a money and numbers game- 15 minutes per patient, premuim to cost ratios, BLAH BLAH BLAH. One must know the buzz words or can be turned away- clearly you warranted this help when you first called the agency , and yet because you said house "work", you were turned away. GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

Mental health care as well- maybe your spirit was "not completely set right" after your tragic accident. Much suffering, guilt, self-doubt and misunderstanding could have been avoided had you had the right tools and support. As it is, you managed heroically to take care of  yourself and to raise a lovely daughter- truly a miracle. If only you had proper support, things might not have been as hard and grueling for you to accomplish this. Still, you did all of the punishing work that it took to do what was right, and you did your duty and came through! I think that the power of love is amazing, and certainly can be seen in your life in what you have done.

One thing that is certainly perfectly intact despite all assaults is your rapier like wit and sense of humor in all situations. You are a marvel and such fun!

Love And  Best Wishes For Better and Better Days!!!!

Love and Prayers For Your Happiness and Healing,

Changing

[lighter]

hi all
was taking pictures to take back to her boss and others. To get a picture of the larger sore on my heel she looked baffled, so I'm in my chair and shot my leg straight up in the air and the sore was just at the right height for her to photograph. She said, "Oh MY!"}[/color]

Heh... that's our girl, lol; )

Sorry if they set the leg wrong....  maybe it shifted with all the on again off again casting? 

You'll have your privacy back soon enough.... hang in there.

[isittoolate]

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm---*yawnnnnnnnnnnnnn* ^s-t-r-e-t-c-h[[[[[[[[[[[[[*yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn*

I fell asleep at my only one lie-down so far.

Shunned" what colour to paint the ceiling"         and no, no meds like tylenol---yet. Yes good people and none of them was clock watching!!

Hops *yawn* -- 'twas said the swelling might take a year. I expect the external sores will take less. Yes. It is a minor loss of privacy and it doesn't even matter if I'm not yet dressed---until I fling my leg in the air again.


changing--oh how you remember the details. and with home visits they don't stop at 15 miinutes. I've been made to feel that "it is important to fix me up as I am worth it". Yes, I will likely always wonder if there would have been a different outcome with proper Counselling at the time. Oh I certainly find it worth it to have the fun I do have.

lighter-- the leg thing was mentioned under hops because I was talking about being only in a nightgown and I'm sure they would ask me to not do THAT again. I think my leg shifted in Emergency when 100 people were hanging onto it getting ready to cast it. I think that's when I remember hearing/feeling a *slip* as there was one smooth break and one jagged-- or maybe not. Anyway if a year goes by and I am pigeon-toed on the left from the broken ankle and the swiveled Roboboot of 2003 and slightly bowed on the right from a double break in 2007, I might look kinda cute!

Dave, the male nurse in Ambulatory Care, slipped me that tube of Cream. He was mortified to see my leg and when he could said he was sorry, and I just referred to it as the Cream  I was using---so he wouldn't get into trouble.

Hope I sleep tonight

Thank you ladies. So nice of you to stop by my bedside and wish me well.

Love
Izzy

[Leah]

Dear Izzy,

So glad that you are receiving the professional support for yourself and really do understand how it must feel to be invaded.

Wish you speeding healing.

Enjoy your rests.

Why not?  You've a lifelong history of being a diligent hardworker.  So you deserve to rest a little.

Take gentle care of yourself.

Love, Leah

[isittoolate]

Thank you, Leah,

Oh yes, I was a hard worker. but I take breaks, like the one I took heree to photograph my siblings working.

I am still yawning from my afternoon nap.

Hmmm. Whole new setup!

Love
Izzy

[changing]

Wow- looks like Van Gogh!

Keep resting and healing Dear One.

Love,

Changing

[lighter]

Poor Dave.... no good deed goes unpunished: (

[Leah]

Thank you, Leah,

Oh yes, I was a hard worker. but I take breaks, like the one I took here to photograph my siblings working.

I am still yawning from my afternoon nap.

Hmmm. Whole new setup!

Love
Izzy

Hi Izzy

How are you today, fully rested?

The photograph you posted last night has haunted me today, in so much as, the sheer hard manual work that folks had to break a back at, years ago.  Particularly, as I have today, heard farm machinery trundling up the lane.  The dawning realization just struck me of how  automated by machines the farm work is today. 

Striking contrast.

And have had compassionate thoughts of my Dad, and his family, and of how hard they must have worked.

We have so much to be grateful for.

Just rambling.

Thank you for sharing the photograph.

Love, Leah

[isittoolate]

Hi Leah,

Very interesting you would be thinking this.

Yes, everything became automated.

What my Dad did, after all the girls left home, leaving just he and my brother, is that he switched from mixed farming (dairy, grain) to beef farming. Beef farming was raisng beef cattle, just by feeding them.  Fatten them up and sell them. Reproduce, no milking, the calves took care of that, then the calves became "women and had their children" and he made far more money in that.

I will say the hard work never, in the long run, hurt me as I was always a hard worker, but was happy to finish THAT hard work.

I left home in 1956 and it was 1963 that he sold the farm (doesn't seem  long, eh?) paid cash for a house in the city and semi-retired.

If one didn't think hard enough and know the inside story it almost seems as though we did all that hard work for nothing--not so tho'

Love Izzy---with no calloused hands now
2nd pic is me wearing headgear to keep manure smell out of hair.

[Leah]

Hi Izzy,

Thanks ever so much for sharing your farm life story and the photographs too.

Your dad switching to beef farming would have been a most wise option I would think bearing in mind only two pairs of hands on deck.

Living off the land must be great, though I always have a respect of the fact of the hard work.

Have a real love of the land and it's animals.

My most precious memory is when aged 6 yrs I think, we were staying on my paternal relatives farm for a holiday, and I stood and watched a mother give birth to a calf with absolute awe and wonder.  I named the calf 'bambi' 

And I so love the picture of the cow in the field.

No calloused hards, ah Izzy, glad they're not too.

Love your dairying photograph, you are so blessed to have photographs such as this, you look like a stereotypical sweet 'milk maid'

and I love the hat 

Thanks ever so much for sharing.  Genuine pleasure.

Love, Leah