On the other hand, I know some folks to whom I'd never dare make that suggestion... it simply wouldn't be worth the grief.
They're not necessarily npd folks, just very insecure personalities who have not yet learned to live beneath the surface of life by laying aside the shame of the ages... but that's another story. All I know is - there's no opportunity for genuine intimacy with such a person. I know that because I was one...
and I had not a clue what it would be like to be utterly transparent in relationship. Now I have a clue and want to build on that : )
Dear Carolyn,
I just found this:
"If you rebuke a mocker, you will only get a smart retort; yes, he will snarl at you. So don't bother with him; he will only hate you for trying to help him. But a wise man, when rebuked, will love you all the more. Teach a wise man, and he will be wiser; teach a good man, and he will learn more." Proverbs 9:8-9, TLB5
I figured you would appreciate it!
Love,
Lise
Thank you, Lise... that's the truth! I love the Biblical Proverbs so much... and to read them in the Living Bible just makes them leap off the page with clear meaning!
You know, I think it's safe to say that most of us don't
enjoy being told we're wrong, and yet would we really go out of our way from that point onward in attempts to make our "rebuker" look bad? No way! I know I wouldn't.
Just thinking in comparison here, between the "average" human beings I know and those who are possibly disordered (like this one with whom I work who absolutely
glories in catching another person in a mistake - ugh.) If
she is revealed to be in error (and cannot deny it), I have watched her go absolutely bonkers with misery, snotty and sulking, until the next mistake (by someone else) comes to light, at which time she's practically giddy with glee! It is so weird... and really, beyond obnoxious to behold. I seriously need to concentrate on ignoring this woman. Praying for her daily is helping to ease my annoyance, but still... whew. This was one of those days.
Honestly, I would generally rather just correct someone else's mistakes than to have to risk embarassing them about it... but sometimes it can't be helped, because you don't want it to go on happening! But I still dread those times, especially with this one. Just like npd-ex.
Hugs, Lise, I really appreciate the Word... and please feel free to point out my rubbish any time, lest I trip myself or someone else up in it!
Love,
Carolyn
