Ever Good Enough?? A Must See!!

[Certain Hope]

Not sure whether this one has ever been noted here, but an excellent site, I think -   

http://www.nevergoodenough.com/index.asp

Welcome To The Resource Website For Daughters Raised By Narcissistic Mothers

Do you sometimes have the feeling that you "flunked" childhood and it was all your fault?

Have you often felt not good enough?

Have you always tried to overachieve but then felt lacking?

Is it difficult to give yourself credit?

Do you experience self-sabotage?

Do you fear you will become like your mother?

Do you have difficulty trusting people?

Do you find it difficult to experience and trust your own feelings?
If the answer is yes, you are not alone.

Here you will also find information related to an upcoming book: Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers from the Legacy of Distorted Love, written by Dr. Karyl McBride.

An anonymous client relates the following;

"The most important gift Dr. McBride gave me and taught me was that no matter what I did in my life, whether it was extremely wonderful or horrifying, it would never change the way my mother is. That the love I hoped for from my mother wasn't ever going to happen the way I wanted it to. The best part about all of this is, I learned that IT'S NOT MY FAULT!!!

Dr. McBride has given me priceless tools that continue to help me through deep rooted narcissistic abuse, so I may live a happier life with myself, my son, my husband, and family. I have given up the old hope of getting my mother's love...In turn, the love in my heart is overflowing and more powerful than I ever imagined."

[Overcomer]

I was interviewed by Dr M and cannot wait to read the book and see if portions of my story made it.

[Certain Hope]

Very neat, Kelly! This is the first time I recall ever hearing of Dr. McBride, but I miss alot on the board during my busier seasons.

Do you know when her book is supposed to come out? I've only just happened across her site and not done much exploring yet.

Carolyn

[Overcomer]

I think this summer.  Someone mentioned it here and I contacted the Dr and talked with her for over an hour.  Her mother was like that so every time I said something she would explain her Behavior to me and it just have me such validation.

[Certain Hope]

Thank you, Kelly! I signed up to stay in touch re: new developments at her website.

[Overcomer]

I plan on buying a copy-reading it cover to cover and then maybe put a post it note on the page with my story and give it to my mom to read.

[Certain Hope]

I plan on buying a copy-reading it cover to cover and then maybe put a post it note on the page with my story and give it to my mom to read.

Yowza, Kelly. That'll be interesting.. gulp.

[Overcomer]

duh!  Since the doc has to change names and tweek the story to protect my privacy,  my mom will not even get it.

[Certain Hope]

Kelly, you don't think she'd get a clue, even with that page/section specially marked by a post-it note?

Wow... now that is oblivious.

[Overcomer]

I guess it would depend on how close the stories were.  But I know when I tell my mom my perception of what happened it almost always is completely different in her mind.  I am going to love this cool because it zeros in on the specific things that I and many of us here had to deal with growing up.  I love the cover as well.  My mom was truly self absorbed and still is.  An example is my aunt and the bookkeeper and my mom went to convention and they told them my mom was very well respected.

[Overcomer]

My mom goes around like Hillary Clinton and talks about her years of experience and has everybody fooled into thinking she really knows a lot.  Problem is she knows about her career in the 70s she knows nothing about the nuts and bolts of running our store-only the theory of it.  This goes right along with feeling grandiose with nothing to back it up.  And yet she has all these people believing she understands.

[Overcomer]

And I do not mean that Hillary does not know what she is doing-I think she does-although I do not think I will vote for her.  I have always voted Republican but this time I am watching the democrats closely.

[Certain Hope]

I get the picture, Kelly. My only brother is that way about his business... when all of us who are aware of the real workings of the thing know how quickly he'd fall without a reliable, knowledgable staff and partner. It's all alot of bluster, really.

But Kelly, I wonder whether most of those people are really expressing their true thoughts when they toss out compliments such as those your mom seems to get. There's a whole slew of empty talk that goes on in some environments (like at church  and conventions, etc.)... and you don't really know what people truly think of her (unless you could hear them in the privacy of their own offices and homes).

All I know is, I've really had to guard my own heart against envy for my brother, because I don't want to spend my thoughts begrudging him any favor he receives... whether I think he deserves it or not.  Every ounce of that sort of energy we expend takes away from our own enjoyment and ability to receive in life, you know? It's really like placing a curse on ourselves and we're the only ones who can stop it.

[Overcomer]

Wow Certain-someone else who has experienced the smoke and mirrors.  And maybe they think she will buy from them if they compliment her.  But she does self promote.

[Gabben]

Hi Carolyn,

This looks interesting. I just saw this book the other day when I was researching for Ami about not feeling as if she ever messured up enough to her mom.

I was thinking someone here is going to see this an introduce it our board -- THANK YOU!

Lise