Oh I love that strategy - a problem with an 'unmentionable"' part of your body! So funny and sad! So the doctor is going to do more tests on hers next week. Oh boy. Some people just don't have much to give. Seems like they have a slow leak somewhere and you just can't fill them up.
I think I am what they call a "wanna be" -refering to my Native heritage. It's a stretch really but I feel more connected to it than other parts of my heritage. My great grandmother was Shawnee. I've only learned about this fairly recently actually and hope to learn more. Now I know why I always got to play "the Indian" in school plays - great black braids back then! I'm curious to know more about your, (as you said) "as Indian as you can get" way of life.
Took my mother shopping today. Maybe all this venting is working. I wasn't quite as wound up in a tight ball as I usually am.
Well since I don't know any Shawnee, perhaps I can borrow your sign off if you don't mind
Toksha Ah-keh
Hi les. So glad to hear from you. That is really cool that you are part Shawnee. I don't know too much about the tribe but I think they're in Oklahoma. Don't call yourself a wannabe. You have native blood running through your veins and you are Shawnee as far as I'm concerned.
I'm glad you felt better taking your mother shopping. I do think it's helping to vent because I don't feel as hostile to my mother as I usually do. I'm sure putting my feelings down in black & white is helping. As opposed to thinking about it and fuming about it. Or telling my family members how she is bugging the heck out of me.
Well, let's see. When I said I'm as Indian as you could get, I really meant it. I was born to a full blood Sioux father and an almost full blood Sioux mother. My mother's father was half English. This really poses a lot of problem for her because she was illigitimate and back in those days, that was a very bad thing. I sometimes wonder if this is where her problems started.
When I started talking, my first language was Lakota or Sioux. I didn't start speaking English until I was five and I took to it like a duck takes to water. lol I could now be mouthy in two languages. hehheh
Anyway, my way of life is modern, as you can see I am on the net lol, but very Lakota (Sioux) oriented. My granddaughter dances at all our pow-wows, my family participates in sundances, some sing at the drum, etc. etc. A lot of our traditions are a lot different from the non Indian world and of course, there are the similarities. We have young people in baggy clothes listening to rap, etc. etc.
I love my culture very much and when I was young, I lived in NJ for a while and then went to BYU for a couple years. After that I got married and lived in Denver for a while but didn't want to worry about my children constantly so we moved back to the rez.
My parents lived here all their lives and with both of them working, they were able to do very well for themselves.
I and all my sisters have also done very well, in spite of Mother, but she has never appreciated us. I'm not kidding. I was the Personnel Director for my tribe for 21 years until I said "I can't do this anymore" and retired. I also served on our Tribal Council for one term way back in 1982,
The next sister has worked for the US govt. for the past 29 years, the next sister worked in fiscal management and was the comptroller for our casino. She quit too due to dirty politics and corruption which she could not take anymore. She now works for a women's shelter called Cangleshka. The fourth sister is a Social Worker for the state and was a past judge in our juvenile court. The last sister was in the Army and is presently in Colorado where her husband was recently transferred. They have been all over the world, lucky things.
So as you can see, we have all accomplished something in our lives but our mother will never say a good word about any of that to us. If she wants to brag to her friends, she will say something but it's more in the tone of "this is what my kids are doing and what have yours ever done."
So embarrasing. She does have a niece that she favors above all of us and this has always been a bone of contention with the three younger sisters. This niece is a professonal shoplifter and drug dealer and will bring my mother expensive gifts that she stole. When she does that, my mother oohs and aahs over the gifts and doesn't say a word about our gifts. Not that our gifts are pitiful or anything. In fact, we use to all compete to give her the best gift. Nobody does that anymore and she complains but I know I turn a deaf ear to her. BTW, the druggie niece and my mother are on the outs right now because of some argument they had. But I've removed myself from all that so it doesn't bother me.
Gee, am I writing a book or what? I'd better stop here. But I just want to say again about how glad I am to have found this site. I honestly believe the few days I've been venting has helped me so much.
Yes, you are very welcome to use the sign off in Lakota.
Toksha Ah-keh
