Frozen Pizza vs Delivery

[Overcomer]

A few months ago my mom invited some family over to her house to eat.  She went to the local grocery and bought some prepared lasagna and pizza and baked it in her oven.  Both the lasagna and pizza were burned.  (she has never been a good "cook.")  Well, we were all very disappointed but let it slide..........because, well, what are you to do but talk behind her back.

So yesterday we went to lunch and I have to say, I really got my mom but that is for a later post!!!  Then she said we were all going to gather at her house for pizza.  We were excited to see family and eat, you know............Pizza Hut or one of our favorite pizza places in our town.  I called my mom and she said she was at the grocery.

I called my daughter and said, "I think she is going to pick up pizza at the grocery!"  We both moaned.  She came home and I said, "hey mom, you want me to call the pizza place for you?"  She told me she had picked up pizza at the grocery.  And it wasn't the deli kind this time either, it was frozen pizza.  She picked up two frozen pizzas and then dug out three more from her deep freeze.  They had been in there for months.

She baked it with the help from my daughter (we didn't want it to get burned.)  But this time the middle fell out from the middle of the pizza.  The outside got cooked but the inside was dough.  The last two pizzas were stale and gross.

All that to say.............my mom is a wealthy woman!!!!  She is so stubborn and cheap that she won't even call out for delivery!!  There are all kinds of specials out there.  I even said that.  "Mom, all the pizza companies have specials right now!!" 

I think she did it to spite us all.  Just another one of her stupid and ridiculous.............."I have to be right!!!"

[mudpuppy]

Shoulda got a Digiorno.

mud

[Sealynx]

Overcomer,
They are worse than a two year old about food. The stories I could tell!!! This is probably a no win situation. Here are solutions I have tried and how they played out...

1. You buy a pizza. You have to listen to how bad it tastes and how expensive it was compared to the frost bitten leather she had in the freezer for the entire meal. Even though the food was good any chance you have of digesting it has been ruined.

2. You offer to pay if everyone goes out for a pizza. The above scene plays out in public with the added perk that she gets to abuse the waitress and tell the manager just how inferior his or her whole operation is. You dread ever setting foot in the place again.

3. You give up on the Pizza idea and go some place nice. The above scene still plays out and you have ruined your reputation at an upscale restaurant.

I would eat before you see her. Eating should be a healthy, pleasurable activity. To this day I have to refrain from bolting my food because the experience is so linked to abuse at the dinner table.

[Overcomer]

Haha.....this is how I GOT her.

She called and my nephew was in town.  She said let's do lunch.  I told her there was no way I was going to bring my 15 year old autistic daughter......she has a crush on my nephew and makes everyone very uncomfortable.  She talks to him loudly and hugs him and it is so over the top.

So my mom always wants her to be involved in everything..............I said no.  She tried to give me the silent treatment, the guilt, the everything she had in her NPD arsenol.
I still said no.

So we were getting ready and she called and said, "Chris and I are coming over."  I said, "NO, we are not ready.....I will call you when we are ready!!"

So I started thinking about it and realized she was coming over so my daughter would see them and insist that she go with us.

So I told my other daughter to finish getting ready and WE went to HER house and showed up unannounced.

I knew what game she was playing and I called her on it!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Overcomer]

Sea:  thanks for your response.......luckily my mom doesn't do that kind of thing in public.  She is the type of N that holds all her N cards for the family and work.  She is very, very sarcastic if anyone calls her on anything.

Sometimes she will pay for everyone's meal and the next time she won't.  You NEVER EVER know which person she is going to be.  One time she will say one thing and the next time she will contradict what she said the first time......

[lighter]

Sounds like you guys should pick up fresh dough and make your own personal pizzas.
 Mo2

[Logy]

OMG!  What is it with NM's and food???

NM and enabling dad volunteer at their church to the point where the church and the members abuse my parents' time.  Last Saturday my parents spent 8 hours outside in 90 degree heat, 68 per cent humidity, at the strawberry festival.  My NM was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes about a year ago.  So that's all she talks about - "my diabetes - what I can and can't eat".  I can GUARANTEE she ate strawberry shortcake there.  So dad brought some of it home.  And when I went over to their house on Sunday, she went on a rage about how "inconsiderate" dad was for bringing that into the house, knowing that she has diabetes.  Then she says"ok, I'll have some."

Sorry, that is off topic a little.  But my NM does have major food issues.  When I was a child, it was all about rationing.  She controlled the food in the house.  Food was scarce, at least for us kids.  After we grew up and started to have our own lives, suddenly it was extreme overload of food when we visited NM and dad.  And co-dad is in such denial, he once told me that he doesn't understand why NM "weighs as much as she does, she eats like a bird."  I told him she "eats like a pig and stuffs two refrigerators full of food for 2 people!!!"  And NM's "diabetes" doesn't stop her from eating what she wants at all.

So, Overcomer, what I want to say but got SO overwhelmed with my family history of food, is that your issue with the pizza is typical of what I have experienced, just different.

[Overcomer]

Food has never been the real issue with her.  It is about modeling being frugal.  She thinks she has created a monster in all of us.  We all live high on the hog (she thinks) so she is trying to show us how to be frugal. 

She also wants to shows us how to be thin by only eating soup at lunch.  But she has no appetite because she never poops and always feels full.....

I don't know.  It is also a control thing.

On another note...........I told her in no uncertain terms that my 16 years working with her were the worst years of my life!!  Caused me the stress and that is probably why I am fat and have cancer!

[Hopalong]

Kel, hon...
I am sad to think of your precious energy and time being spent in the endless struggle with your mother.

I just wish...she could be off your mind a while.

love to you,
Hops

[BonesMS]

Food has never been the real issue with her.  It is about modeling being frugal.  She thinks she has created a monster in all of us.  We all live high on the hog (she thinks) so she is trying to show us how to be frugal. 

She also wants to shows us how to be thin by only eating soup at lunch.  But she has no appetite because she never poops and always feels full.....

I don't know.  It is also a control thing.

On another note...........I told her in no uncertain terms that my 16 years working with her were the worst years of my life!!  Caused me the stress and that is probably why I am fat and have cancer!

Kel,

The NWombDonor sounds VERY Anal Retentive!  That's why she's so full of **IT!

Bones

[Overcomer]

hahaha....that was hysterical

and yes, Hops, it is not doing me any good to obsess over what a bad mother I have had.  It doesn't do me much good.  Unfortunately my situation now is scary because of cancer and less money and needing to move, etc.

My mom asked me what I wanted from her and I said,,,,,,,,,,,I want you to surprise me with something so awesome that I cannot fathom it......I want you to be my hero, I want you to be to me someone so awesome that I yell from the roof "You all are not going to believe what my awesome mom just did!!"  I told her I wanted to want to put her picture on my wall with a plaque under it that says "My Hero."

Her response? "Ruminating........how I would know how to do that....."

No she could never do the unexpected.  She just doesn't have it in her.  If I need something I have to ask.  She doesn't say......"honey, how can I help you out?"  "You look stressed, what can I do for you?"

I just want her to say, "Here is a check for a million dollars, I know it is a lot less then you would get when I die but I know it might help you out right now...."