Ok. The dizzy T suggests a neurologist too, Hops, but get this......
The really needy dad was invited to dinner Saturday night. He was present when the vertigo began, at the lake, as were many other people.
Saturday I was ok, but had a bit of feeling on a boat. Not bad, just not as clear as I'd felt before the dizzy appointments, which seemed to cure the room spinning vertigo, which only happened when looking up hard or sometimes down. Confusing, I know.
So, I felt close to normal as I worked on dinner prep till an hour before needy guy arrives......and bam! Just the adrenaline and thought of crunch time and his arrival sent the "on a boat" feeling into overdrive.
I took the pug for a walk and wanted to fall to my knees, sobbing, but got curious instead. The feeling lasted through the evening, he left at 11:30....and I woke the next am feeling almost normal. Again.
There have been days of zero symptoms, dizzies or boaties going on.
As far as supplements, it might be more a matter taking a break from ashwaganda, Hawthorne, B and D vitamins since return from my island. I've started back, but not as regularly.
And......a thought can make it worse, still. In the car. It's not consistent. Almost like a little electrical zap to the nervous system.
I had a regular T appointment this morning and we were going to work with avoidance. Instead, we went into the "on a boat" feeling....where did I feel it? Above left eye to top of head, left side.
Bring presense and light to it .....
Ask what it has to say....
And ...
For the first time, there was nothing. Like the part was playing possum or asleep.
Really focused and a protective part felt like it wanted to slap me out if old habits and into being present always.
The sleeping part's eyes fluttered.... didn't open, then many many of my parts peeled away from me, into a circle, and chattered like the daughters from the EVIL series ...all at once with ideas and suggestions.
That felt like what I get from inviting parts to become allies, consistently.
T asked to focus only on THE current protector and wounded part ....a child.
I held her and the light filled her.....the energy and pain around this, mostly popping up in center chest, throat and skull) dissipated. T said she's (wounded child part) is going to require tending ...like a child in daycare. Checking in. Earning her trust.
She also said it's common for parts to become alienated, completely, and not understand..... they're not alone.
Since I usually have an easier time understanding the parts, this part might have been pre verbal, but that just occurred to me.
As of now, I have no symptoms, though I distinctly felt things shift in my brain when I went from standing to horizontal.
That's where this is ..... I'm allergic to what's likely a type of needy, pushy, selfish baby man requiring attention, nurturing and relationship I'm not cool with......and it feels like an allergy, as of Saturday night.....and also negative thoughts, typically those critical of self.....anger in the car.
There was more detailed focus on the wounded child than included. I might rewrite this later.
