Farm Doin's - 2020

[sKePTiKal]

Nope, I can't name it; already asked when I realized how long their proposed name was. The county system is based on historical place names; which I'm all for - I've read a good bit of the history of this place. And since it's really a "place name" instead of a road that goes somewhere... I think I like it. Covers all ~150 acres. I'll have to check Google Earth and see if my driveway name gets updated in a few months. LOLOLOL. Right now, they have my address shown as being on the other side of the ridge - which isn't surprising since GPS craps out right about there too. Hol says her phone app says you have to walk the rest of the way, from where our mailboxes are at the highway. LOLOLOL.

If you don't know what you're looking for as you're driving the highway - you'll completely miss my road (as it's called now) and since my new address won't be the same road and you won't be able to get to here EXCEPT via the first road - my fingers are crossed the post office will let me move the mailboxes the mile up the road to my driveway (will get marked private shortly). I'm not holding my breath though.

Guess I'll have to shop for a couple signs for my place. To keep the UPS/FedEx guys happy and my neighbors who often have to give directions to the delivery guys from having to explain "we're not who you're looking for, no matter what your GPS or Google says".

[Hopalong]

The Google maps lady once directed me straight into a Pennsylvania cornfield.

Not a joke.


Hops

[sKePTiKal]

It's 10 years ago, now... but I rented a car at O'Hare to drive to my Dad's funeral and asked for a map. The last time I'd driven in Chicago was 10 more years before THAT. The agent just looked at me funny and asked if I wanted recreational attractions or restaurants/hotels... and I had to explain I wanted a roap map. They didn't have one anywhere in the office. I stopped at a gas station somewhere in Indiana and got one. Fortunately, my memory is such that the route numbers and landmarks were still in my head - even in a stressful, time sensitive situation (I couldn't get an earlier flight as I was vacationing at the beach when the call came) - I made it just fine. I had to change clothes when I got there.

I can drive from the beach to Michigan, without a map because the roads & exits are engraved on my memory. But I now ALWAYS pack my own current atlas. I still have my fear of getting lost or turned around in cities. Out in the boonies, I'm better off... and known the general compass direction I'm driving... and haven't been shy about stopping and asking directions if I'm that far off the beaten trail. I just take immense pleasure in knowing that there are still places that aren't identifiable by satellite or GPS coordinates around. I even have a star, constellation identifier that doesn't work here - because it can't verify my GPS location. LOLOLOL.

That's how you know you're really in the boonies. 

[Hopalong]

Boonie Girl,

With you on all that, and hooray for real maps!
I enjoy them less these days because of glasses-switching, but that's because I've been relying on varying drugstore readers for too long. I definitely need a proper prescription. Coming back home last night I missed an exit and had a nice long detour. Finally faced facts...I MUST have prescription glasses for driving. Things are just getting fuzzy in the dark. Damn, I'll have to break my winning streak of not going indoors anywhere.

One thing I feel compelled to add to the B saga, even though it's not really necessary. I just want to pipe up for docs who really are in it for the right reasons. We've all met burned-out or indifferent medicos, but there are also many who do it because they care about people and want to relieve pain and cure disease. I think an overwhelmed, underfunded system that doesn't support them and reduces them to paper pushers (keyboard clickers) has changed things for patients but I don't believe most docs are bad or indifferent people. I'm terribly sorry B has dealt with poor medicine and medical errors so much. To live in such pain really grates on the spirit.

Hugs
Hops

[sKePTiKal]

Agreed on the docs, Hops. I know some fine ones. This complaint isn't against docs/nurses (who did everything in their power to help him over the last 4 years)... it is TOTALLY against the system that has been made rediculously cumbersome and complex. I laugh maniacally at times, at how the patient record database is essentially useless despite the massive financial investments and time it took to get it up & running when the humans don't bother looking at it and READING it. Of course, most of 'em are under pressure to get a patient in/out in 15 minutes or less. As if that's good medical practice.   :rolling eyes so far I'm looking out my rear end:   (I wonder if rolling my eyes that far would help stop the cataracts I seem to be developing?)

Now that he's home, he's following his own healing protocols. Figure a week at most, before he tries to get back "at it" again, knowing him. Meanwhile I've asked him to think long and hard about just what absolutely has to be done - and what he's willing to let go - to get here and have some support and the possibility of finishing up getting him physically ready to be well. And to please be flexible about taking things one day at a time, and not sticking to any original plan or goal... IF the situation warrants an adjustment in "timeline, how, goals met".

This is going to cost me a whole batch of oatmeal raisin cookies, with some molasses/spice cookies for good measure.

He drives a hard bargain. 

[Hopalong]

:rolling eyes so far I'm looking out my rear end:

Amen and amen! And you're absolutely right, it's an inefficient, underfunded system that reflects America's terrible drift toward profits over people, over and over again. It bugs me most in education but B's story is an outrageous example of getting caught in the maw of all that.

I am SO glad you're going to help him step aside. If anybody could be an ally and supporter to someone going through this kind of battle, it's Amber the Amazon.

B is a lucky man, and I hope he'll get to the mountain soon.

hugs
Hops

[sKePTiKal]

Thanks Hops - I know he's workin' on it. 3 days post-op and he's back on light duty. Picking up meds, misc errands, moving around so he doesn't sit & get stiff - or have nothing to do but pay attention to the minute shades (and not so minute) of pain.

I am still sorting/organizing in the kitchen & dining room. Visually, it's just too busy for me to look at. So I'm making another pass at the "ticky tacky" stuff; stuff I rarely use (do I really need a butane torch for creme brulee?? hmmmm. I guess that depends on if I'm going to keep trying to make it, huh?) My canisters are breeding; I have 3 kinds of rice, bulgur, couscous, flour- sugar- etc ad excessium.

Once upon a time - B.H. (before Hol) - I had things pretty well organized and ready for kitchen business. She had other ideas - and since she was cooking and baking too - I "gave way". And I wasn't even at the point then, where I was asking myself: why on earth did I keep that?! Ingredients got stashed where ever there was room, instead of refilling vacumn canisters... so the cupboards are so full, I can't quickly take inventory on what to shop for. And I do believe there is at least one cabinet I want to change - it's too deep for canned goods and things get lost in the back of the shelf.... et voila... idea of a better solution popped into my head - door needs to be on the long dimension.

I have all the crazy colors of beach-vibe old linens that I brought with me, and was changing color schemes of things gradually... and so it's all a mish-mosh, looks cluttered & "busy"... and it bothers my OCD. I could/should be doing other more "important" things... but THIS is what I want to do and what I'm doing.

So there.

[lighter]

You GO, Amber.

Immerse yourself fully in what you're doing.

You'll get to the other stuff soon enough.

Lighter

[sKePTiKal]

Well, I had to take a break and dive into number crunching for the business. It's a pretty scary scenario - and I gave into panic & anxiety a bit. I find if I allow that to run free, and exhaust itself (usually less than 24 hrs) then my head clears and I'm able to make the decisions - or at least recommendations for a group decision - that need made.

For more than 5 years, we've been hoping that X event passing would lead things to improve. Beginning in March of this year - thank you virus - every month, we've watched sales slide as any large projects that would involve our tools has been shelved because of the insanely high level of anxiety & uncertainty everyone everywhere is feeling. Especially in business - no one is taking any risks whatsoever. Can't say I blame 'em -- but it hurts our sales.

There is absolutely no indication that the 30% contraction in our sales market is temporary at this point. Which means it very well could be permanent -- setting us back to net income levels more consistent with 2009, when brother & I took over the company. Which means all of us are going to have to tighten our belts & budgets. Thankfully, most of the Hut expenses are done. And I worry most for the shop employees as they're getting older, and price inflation has shot up this year, especially in groceries. So I have to find a way to get them involved in the decision making process, letting them choose what suits them the best... to reduce our expenses. (Personnel & benefits are our biggest expense true; - more this year will shift to medicare as their primary health insurance but I also don't want to lose their knowledge/skills either, but perhaps making them just look elsewhere. Then, there's the need to bring in younger people and get them acclimated and trained.)

I've gotten Hol involved to brainstorm ideas, so far. This moves to the Board of Directors (myself, brother & guy in charge) soon. Borrowing money is the absolute LAST thing on the options list; and I will continue to avoid that any way I possibly can. Fortunately, the guys welding in their home shops or garages have increased to be about a third of our sales - they're taking on side jobs many of them and helping keep tractors, farm equipment and heavy equipment operational.

I am convinced that no matter the election results - there isn't going to be an end to this risk averseness in the business community. I don't KNOW, but would love to think that this is as low as things will go - but I ain't betting the farm on that. So, we'll see what happens. How we might be able to adapt/reorganize to live with lower sales.

Meanwhile, Stinkerbell I noticed, is growing tomcat equipment. It's all as tiny and dainty as he is right now. LOL. But perhaps that's why Freddy has taken on training the little stinker. He'll be tired tonight; Hol took all the kittens in for shots and to get Mama fixed. Gracie has had 3 litters just this year. It's a kindness to the cat, even if she is a good mama.

[Hopalong]

Oh Jeez, Amber. Good thing you have strong arms to carry that heavy plate...

Covid Not Enough?
Ailing lover not enough?
Now...the business?

YET. You are rational and calm and capable. I think if your employees knew how much you were thinking of them, in their life situations, right now, they'd be grateful. I'm very sorry.

I know you'll do the very best you can by them, and tighten your own belts without too much angst. It is a good thing you've gotten so much done on the mountain already. Anything more is icing on a cake.

If frugality and self-reliance have to kick in, I can't think of anyone better suited.

I hope things turn around enough to keep the ship afloat, or at least with enough sales coming in to keep the doors open.

hugs
Hops

[sKePTiKal]

The whole thing is sort of a balancing act. And nothing is consistent month to month; year to year. It truly is my fault that I while I have been paying attention, I HAVEN'T paid close attention to how close to the edge things were getting. So much so, that our usual comfy "cushion" just isn't there anymore.

When the bookkeeper alerted me back in March... I started paying much closer attention but still didn't do a deep dive. Everything would be OK; it always has been. Over the summer, I started tracking things closely... and coming up with options for balancing the situation. It's not like I hadn't predicted the current major imbalance years ago. But surely - surely - this was just a temporary situation, right? After all, even before the last election we were already talking about this and still believing that there was positive change just over the horizon....

I think I'm ready to change the Benegesserit prayer to: "Hope is the mind-killer".

It's not that I, or even we, did absolutely nothing to make small adjustments. It's getting to the point that for all intents & purposes, no one wanted to believe that this wasn't temporary. That it was permanent. And the few really "hot sales" years were the aberration. (Money people constantly sell the illusion that "growth is always infinite"; total P.T. Barnum hucksterism. Last time I talked to my guys, they were asking ME for advice/crystal ball predictions. LOL.)

So, facing the pit of the stomach fear is kinda my way of kicking myself. Head on; worst-case scenario. GO THERE. Have all the feelings, the absurd thoughts, get it out of my system. Rest, sleep, do the mundane stuff I do around the house to "make order" from chaos.... And then approach the problem again. Today I have one question to ask the bookkeeper... and then I'm ready to present the full slate of options along with my recommendations and how quickly to implement them.

I ain't giving up without a fight.    Business is SIMPLE. Or it should be. And once more people remember that, and this entropic mess that exists in our economy is finally decentralized again... (no, bigger isn't always better; just like growth isn't infinite) then certainty and predictability (or what can exist within reality) can return again, and people will take calculated, prepared risks again. And yes, the economy will start to grow - on a more solid foundation. The REAL economy - not this monopolistic, financialized, crony-capitalist wall st. thing that is some Frankenstein's monster.

I need to have a conversation with Buck. 

[Hopalong]

Amber, I truly hear your sorrow for not having anticipated all this or not having tracked it very closely while you were preoccupied with the mountain.

I'm sure you and your brother are not the first employers to feel caught off guard by how bad things can get, with all the losses of jobs and health coverage, etc., that might possibly come with it. I'm sorry you and your employees are in this boat but guilt won't help.... It's the corporate sociopaths who discard 'em without a thought we don't need---folks like you who face the pain and also the responsibility are the good 'uns.

Trot out that amazing executive function and you'll make the best that you can now of a bad situation. I'm sure it feels awful but it's your role in this horrid time. You'll do it better than most and with empathy and a functioning conscience, that's very clear.

Good on you! Be kind to yourself while you work through it. I hope you and your brother find solidarity in the tasks.

hugs
Hops

[sKePTiKal]

Sunday was my day to immerse in the "horror of the situation" Hops. By noon, Monday... I knew what I needed to know be as informed as I could be with actual data. The rest of this situation requires ye olde crystal ball... intuition... some dusty, dry, reports reading... and digging down into trades literature... and maybe even throwing the i-ching.

By Monday, I need a building permit for the metal shop and final decisions on construction. Materials availability is starting to become a factor. Then there is the actual work I'm trying to do/get done before the snow flies. So, quick construction is a plus. That is also making it difficult to estimate jobs. I need to follow up on a couple of rent-a-men this week for a couple smaller jobs as it is.

Organized as much as I can be; pulling in favors where I can; scrambling and juggling. Good news is contractor's excavator is here; finishing Hol's pond. Top soil from that is gonna get used for raised beds and landscaping around the hut. A pad will get leveled for her garage - freeing up the garage under my studio again, for MY tools.

The weather is cooperating today... for me to take care of aesthetics (read: cleaning) the front porch which hasn't been in 2 years due to constant use and mess... and I can no longer STAND it. This one gets done before I work downstairs on the wood storage and the bit of garden I have going.

All this frantic work... is because obstacles, priorities, indecision on various people's parts and reality/weather earlier in the year. And it means I'm going through millernery wardrobe changes several times a day. But at least I'm not getting caught up in the constantly ratcheting up volume & cacaphony of the news...

I need these little breaks, to reflect on what's been accomplished; where I'm at in the timeline; what else needs to be dealt with that has slipped through the cracks of attention, when it's stretched thin. (Those are the things that'll keep me awake into the wee hours. OCD.) And I can keep going until I hit the wall. Buck can make me stop before I get to that point... but right now, he is doing the same thing where he is at, to get here. But in a few weeks, he will be here again.

So.... don't worry about me if there's more time between posts. I'm trying to squeeze every possible thing into the remaining weeks before cold weather sets in... and I'm running out of time. I'm good at this; as long as I know it has an endpoint... and I can go back to being rip van winkle this winter. Sit by the fire, drink tea... and snuggle my stray tomcats... of which, Buck is pack leader. LOLOLOL. Make cookies.

[Twoapenny]

I'm sorry you've got all this other stuff to deal with as well now, Skep.  I'm glad you've got Buck there - by phone at the minute, hopefully really there before too much longer.  Business stuff is way over my head so I've nothing useful to suggest but I really hope that there is/will be some way you can weather the storm, even if it means some things need to change or it all looks a bit different once you come out the other side.  In all honesty I don't think anyone really saw this as being a long term thing - I think most of us thought it was a bit of a rough patch that would right itself one way or another.  Although numbers are high here, it doesn't seem to be doing as much damage as it was and most businesses here are getting by in their various ways so I hope the same happens over there soon as well x

[Hopalong]

Keep us posted with short summaries as you can, Amber...
be thinking of you.

We (I) don't need every nut and bolt of the plans but would love to know you're okay. Just the headlines.

And ignore that if you need a total break for a while, it happens! (I just have separation anxiety, LOL.)

hugs
Hops