Author Topic: Silver Linings  (Read 9292 times)

Hopalong

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13616
Silver Linings
« on: March 19, 2020, 03:58:38 PM »
(This thread isn't aimed at minimizing suffering. Fear and suffering posts don't go here. This is just a spot to post unexpected silver linings you're experiencing as a result of the pandemic.)

--Rediscovering the PS22 Chorus (first time I felt free to cry since all this started, but happy tears--search it on YouTube, you won't be sorry). My fav: "I'm Gonna Love You Through It."

--Phone conversations. Friends and neighbors are sharing voices, not just texts.

--Service. People step up in unexpected, moving ways. Even to the point of sacrifice.

--Music. From YouTube videos offered by famous musicians to connect and cheer, to all sorts of amateur, earnest offerings (my favorite are those from kids), that's humanity.

--Philosophy. Articles that talk about perspective, not mindlessly saying don't be scared, but by addressing core human connection that is real no matter how it all turns out individually.

--Politics. Now there's hope.

--Community. People who could remain in mindless bubbles of entitlement are suddenly thinking about gig workers

More later,
hugs--
Hops

« Last Edit: March 20, 2020, 07:39:29 PM by Hopalong »
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8630
Re: Unexpected Silver Linings
« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2020, 07:06:07 PM »
Wow... that song was a tear-jerker,  Hops.  So touching to see kids care so deeply and sing with such feeling.

Thanks for this thread. 

Lighter


Twoapenny

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3739
  • Becoming
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2020, 11:47:38 AM »
Hopsie, I am discovering not just a silver lining but a silver cloak!  It's so bizarre, this is literally the biggest 'thing' that's happened here in my lifetime and it's going to be horrifyingly catastrophic for some but for us it's opening doors and bringing positive things at an astonishing rate!

I mentioned on the other thread that we're within walking distance of four shops.  There are terrible food shortages here (due to people stockpiling) but because we've got easy access to a wide selection there's nothing we haven't been able to get yet.

I am resting, without pressure to stop resting.  For the first time in 18 years, I don't have to take my son anywhere (possibly for the next three months if current reports are anything to go by) and it means I can put my feet up all day if I want to, without having to worry about 'what I need to get done because we're going out tomorrow'.

Because of social isolation - we are no longer isolated!  Everyone else is at home and people aren't going out in the evenings.  So I'm interacting with more people, either by phone or online, than I usually would.  It's great.

Facebook has turned into a lovely community of people posting positive and motivational memes, good factual information, people offering to help each other out and people sharing recipes and ideas for at home activities to keep the kids occupied.

For the first time in many years, I have a more stable income than almost everyone else.  Benefits won't change during this period, whereas a lot of people are suddenly finding they can't go to work (or their work has dried up) and their incomes are going to drop considerably.  People are suddenly having to deal with not being able to pay their rent or bills and not knowing how to claim benefits as they've never done it before.  There is a huge stigma around claiming benefits, but at the moment benefit claimants are the only ones who are guaranteed to be receiving an income.

And on that note, our income has gone up!  We've no bus fares to college, son's disability benefits have gone up slightly (annual increase that's happened this week) and college emailed me this morning.  Son is entitled to free lunches at college but we don't take them because he takes his own lunch in (food sensitivities).  But college are going to pay the money for the lunches into his account while the virus crisis continues.  Plus I am only going out to buy food and I'm only buying the bare essentials so I've got more in my bank account than I would usually have.

A friend has set up a temporary home ed group for people who are suddenly finding out their kids might not be back in school until September now.  I'm helping her out with it (they're all kids with disabilities) and I've suddenly got all these new people to talk to and connect with.  It's nice!

Son's rocking and vocal noises are reducing - the stress of dealing with college and being out and about is seeping out of him and his system is calming down :)

My cannabis oil arrived today!  Yay!

Two neighbours have offered to get shopping for me if need be and one complete stranger on the internet also offered (he realised he lives quite close by and has a car so told me to message him if we need anything).  Very kind.

The buds are out in the tree in the front garden and the birds are sitting in it singing and being happy :)

It's Spring Equinox today!  Yay!

We're getting time to do all the 'cooking from scratch' that I always want to do but often don't get time to do.  I made a big tray of brownies yesterday, I've done various pasta based dishes to put in the freezer and we're having home made pizza tonight, plus I'm having a go at soda bread for the first time.

I am feeling glad that I sent that list to my mum.  My sister called her and offered to get her shopping delivered for her if it would help and my mum was really rude to her and ungrateful.  That is her all over.  So I'm glad I sent that list for my own sake - I would not have been able to live with myself if I hadn't sent her that info and then she caught this and passed.  But she has it, she is no doubt completely unappreciative of it and it doesn't matter - I did it for me and that's what's important.

I listened to music for four hours yesterday while I cooked, completely uninterrupted and it was lovely.

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8630
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2020, 02:08:59 PM »
What an uplifting post, Tupp.  There's so much packed in there!

You're mastering the art of living in the moment.  Trusting yourself.  Trusting the universe. 

Doing what you can regarding your mum, then releasing expectations...  letting that be enough.  It's proactive and what your intuition feels is right, so it's the right thing for you.   

THIS is the life you were born to live. 

SEEING your world expand, during trying times, is another silver lining, yup yup yup: ) 

Lighter

Hopalong

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13616
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2020, 03:45:19 PM »
Silver cloak.

What a stunningly lovely image.
I'm so glad for this Tupp.

All of those individual weights eased, from son's fatigue and your own, to feeling community spirit even at a physical distance.

I hope this all in some way eventually rejuvenates culture, humanity, and community. I do think it's possible this will be a long-term outcome of the world going through something like this together.

Hugs
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

Twoapenny

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3739
  • Becoming
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #5 on: March 21, 2020, 03:55:48 AM »
What an uplifting post, Tupp.  There's so much packed in there!

You're mastering the art of living in the moment.  Trusting yourself.  Trusting the universe. 

Doing what you can regarding your mum, then releasing expectations...  letting that be enough.  It's proactive and what your intuition feels is right, so it's the right thing for you.   

THIS is the life you were born to live. 

SEEING your world expand, during trying times, is another silver lining, yup yup yup: ) 

Lighter

Lighter, it's so weird, during that last session with the T, I said that throughout my life, I have always thought that if I changed my circumstances - by moving house, or getting back to work, or son being looked after, or whatever - that I would feel better about myself.  And of course that's never happened, I've always felt like, whatever I do, I get knocked back down the ladder and have to start again.  We've always seemed to have an awful lot of bad luck and things seem to happen to us that don't happen to other people.

So it's kind of weird (in a nice way) to have had that final session, come out with all my baggage firmly deposited somewhere else, in the middle of a (very badly handled) pandemic - and suddenly find all this good fortune at my door.  Weird but lovely.  I think that would make a good slogan for a T shirt :)  Lol x

Twoapenny

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3739
  • Becoming
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #6 on: March 21, 2020, 03:58:13 AM »
Silver cloak.

What a stunningly lovely image.
I'm so glad for this Tupp.

All of those individual weights eased, from son's fatigue and your own, to feeling community spirit even at a physical distance.

I hope this all in some way eventually rejuvenates culture, humanity, and community. I do think it's possible this will be a long-term outcome of the world going through something like this together.

Hugs
Hops

I really hope so too, Hops.  I'm hoping that this makes people understand that we can't all operate as separate countries any more.  We all need to look out for each other and work collectively to keep the planet healthy, and to keep the people on it healthy.  It's certainly focused my mind on making environmental and socialist type stuff more my 'thing'.  I've always been interested and have done what I can but haven't fully committed, I think.  That's changing now :) xx

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8630
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #7 on: March 21, 2020, 11:57:01 AM »
Tupp:
That's a wonderful silver lining.

I remain in awe of your indomitable spirit.

In a nutshell... what would your T call the process you've moved through?


Light




Twoapenny

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3739
  • Becoming
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #8 on: March 21, 2020, 01:09:09 PM »
Tupp:
That's a wonderful silver lining.

I remain in awe of your indomitable spirit.

In a nutshell... what would your T call the process you've moved through?


Light

I'm not sure, Lighter, what do you mean, the trauma processing?  Or the EMDR stuff? xx

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8630
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #9 on: March 21, 2020, 01:37:07 PM »
The way she'd say you moved through it.  The process... in a nutshell. 

To get to the place you processed.  The processing.  What it is now.

Hopalong

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13616
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2020, 02:55:34 PM »
I'm not understanding the value of what the T would say, after the fact?
It's how Tupp views it, right?

But I'm dense and might be missing a traditional part of the practice of EMDR therapy, a summary report or something.

Bottom line, it is beautiful what you two EMDR graduates have learned and healed!

Big Wowzers,
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

Twoapenny

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3739
  • Becoming
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #11 on: March 21, 2020, 02:57:39 PM »
The way she'd say you moved through it.  The process... in a nutshell. 

To get to the place you processed.  The processing.  What it is now.

Oh I see, sorry, I think all the corona virus reading has made my brain wobble.  She didn't say anything about it, just asked me if I felt we were done and that she felt we'd finished the story up till now, which I agreed with :) I did want to give her a hug but I didn't in case of germs!  Lol xx

lighter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 8630
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #12 on: March 21, 2020, 03:30:18 PM »
Tupp:

I love what the T said... she felt you'd finished the story..... nice.

Sorry you couldn't exchange a hug. 

Lighter


Hopalong

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 13616
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #13 on: March 28, 2020, 06:27:23 AM »
Focusing so much on health from prevention and survival point of view has in many ways been a GOOD thing for me.

I've ordered healthy foods and have no "junk" in my home. (Exception: chocolate's in my next order, but isn't that a vegetable?)

We held our covenant group meeting by Zoom and it was wonderful. Everyone appeared, we walked an older member through her technical issues, humor was good, sharing was terrific, and everyone's looking forward to doing it again.

I have been walking. Nothing dramatic but about 5 times a week. Big change of direction and long overdue. I want to keep it up. I see people even just saying hello (from six feet) and it's cheering.

I've also made four "walk dates" with covenant group members who live nearby. Did my first yesterday and we had a lovely time. No contact, six feet apart, easy to talk and weather was great. I just pulled up, parked, and she was in the yard waiting. Pooch was extremely happy to be sniffing around a new neighborhood.

A mother posted on our neighborhood site that she was taking her young children on a "bear hunt" and asked if anyone who has bears would put them in the their windows. A dozen people responded, PMing the mother their addresses and some even posting a pic. I offered my tiny Paddington Bear for extra credit since he's so little. I love seeing him in the window now and knowing he gave some small child a smile.

More later....
hugs
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

Twoapenny

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3739
  • Becoming
Re: Silver Linings
« Reply #14 on: March 28, 2020, 06:35:17 AM »
Aw I love the bear hunt, idea, Hops, that is so cute!  Be nice if people keep up some of this social and reaching out to the community stuff once the current situation is over.

And I had forgotten about this thread, I have stuff to add!  Like you, I am eating more healthily and snacking a lot less.  Even my desire to snack is massively reduced because I'm not experiencing the stress I usually do, or the temptation from walking past bakeries or snack shops and coffee shops.  It's amazing how much it goes from your mind if you can't see it or smell it.  We are exercising indoors, loads of good videos on YouTube.  My stress levels have just dropped through the floor, it's been so relaxing that I can feel myself enjoying the things I'm doing now, and I'm able to be much more conscious and aware and make choices!  I love making choices :)