I can't believe she did this

[BonesMS]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((TwoAPenny)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Bones

[BonesMS]

Right after I posted my virtual hug to you, TwoAPenny, I received this from another source in my e-mail InBox:



The challenges are not there to pull you down.

Your challenges exist to move you forward.

True greatness comes from

regularly and successfully dealing with

a wide range of challenges.

                                        Ralph Marston, Jr.

I know this helps me ALOT!!!!  I hope it helps you too!!!!!!!!!!!

Bones

[Twoapenny]

Thanks Bones ((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))

I do learn a lot from my 'challenges' and I am pretty strong as a person.  I do think it's helped my personal development - I like to think I'm not too judgemental of people and have more of a live and let live attitude to life.  I have learnt a lot more from life than my parents have, in any case!  But sometimes I think "okay, enough challenges!  Give me something easy to enjoy!"  It will come I know, I just feel so tired mentally at the minute, you know?  Sometimes I think I'd like to just wipe my brain clean and start again - you know how when you're making a cake and it goes wrong sometimes it's easier to start from scratch?  I'd like to be able to do that with my head

Lots of love xx

[BonesMS]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((TwoAPenny)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Bones

[lighter]

Hi Mo2,

  I can understand why people drink!!

I remember the first time I had that thought myself. 

Mo2

[Twoapenny]

Don't know what to do now.  Police rang again yesterday saying they would like to interview my mum and two of my sisters.  They've run checks on my stepdad and there's nothing in the system but they said they're concerned that he might be around other children and want to check him out properly.  They're not able to stop any harrassment though so there is a risk that my mum can make allegations and I will have to deal with agencies acting on those as well as local gossip etc.  I've had four days of not sleeping, vomiting repeatedly, not being able to eat anything and generally struggling to cope - all anxiety related.  I don't know whether to go ahead now or pull out.  Part of me is terrified, the other part thinks if I don't do it now I might not be able to do it again - ie police might not investigate a second time if i retract my statement this time.  Keep veering between wanting to run and hide and wanting to grow a backbone and get on with it.

Any thoughts? xx

[Ales2]

(((((((((((TwoAPenny))))))))))

Do you have anyone available to you for support for both psychological and legal issues? I'm sorry to hear about the anxiety manifesting as illness and thought you might need someone that can support you, confidentially on a daily/regular basis. Sounds like you need very consistent help through this tough time. Are you able to keep up with daily life - paying bills, going to work, cleaning house and maintaining your regular activities as much as possible.
 Let us know how you are getting along.

I wish I could offer you more support at this time than just my posts.   

Sending you my best wishes for resolution and peace in your life.

[Hopalong]

I hope you'll go ahead...

Remember, you are NOT the perpetrator.

You are a decent person who can react with strength and dignity to any potential absurd and malicious accusations. Your mother may be so shocked by her own legal jeopardy, or suggestion that it may land on her, that she may back off. (Bullies can do that.)

Standing for the truth, however belatedly, and standing up for yourself, is something that could change your life (even though it's hard). And you have your sister who will back you up, and it will all be on record.

Just my opinion and you are the one taking the risk (and the reward) so I support your decision whatever it is!

Hops

[Ami]

Dear (((Friend)))
 I get stomach problems with stress, too. My feeling is you should continue now that you have come this far. It is just an intuition.I could be all wrong.
 Your sickness may be your fear of them.Maybe, if you show strength, you will know you can go up against the monster. Maybe, you will gain more respect in your own eyes.
  I respect you so much for what you have lived through and are still are decent and caring person. You will still be a worthy person no matter what you do.
 Try to sit quietly and see which way your still small voice leads.Sending you big hugs and vibes filled with courage and love.   xxoo Ami

[lighter]

Oh, (((twopenny))))

I have such empathy for your predicament.

 I can't tell you what to do, but I understand the stress and vomiting and not being able to eat.

I understand not knowing whether to take cover, live in fear and keep your mouth shut, or speak up and live in the fear of retalliation.
 
It seems the system's available for abusers to manipulate......

but not to protect the abused.

I'm really worried about the children your step father may be in contact with, though.

The Police should care about other victims and that's supposed to be their job.

I'm sending you strength and courage..... hoping your mother doesn't launch another attack.

Mo2

[BonesMS]

Don't know what to do now.  Police rang again yesterday saying they would like to interview my mum and two of my sisters.  They've run checks on my stepdad and there's nothing in the system but they said they're concerned that he might be around other children and want to check him out properly.  They're not able to stop any harrassment though so there is a risk that my mum can make allegations and I will have to deal with agencies acting on those as well as local gossip etc.  I've had four days of not sleeping, vomiting repeatedly, not being able to eat anything and generally struggling to cope - all anxiety related.  I don't know whether to go ahead now or pull out.  Part of me is terrified, the other part thinks if I don't do it now I might not be able to do it again - ie police might not investigate a second time if i retract my statement this time.  Keep veering between wanting to run and hide and wanting to grow a backbone and get on with it.

Any thoughts? xx

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((TwoAPenny))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I'm not familiar with how the system works in England.  I know, here in America, the police can provide or refer crime victims to a support system that helps throughout situations similar to this.  Does the British system have anything similar?

Bones

[Ami]

Thinking of you(((Twoapenny)))))                     xxoo  Ami

[Twoapenny]

Hi all,

Didn't want anyone to think I'd just abandoned this thread after everyone gave me so much help and support, but I haven't posted any more recently because nothing else has happened.  I still don't know what I want to do yet so I decided to just leave it and see what the police suggested next.  So far it's been nothing at all so I'm trying to put my trust in fate (eek!) and see where that takes me.  If anything further happens I will let everybody know. xx

[Ami]

((((Twoapenny)))))                       xxoo  Ami

[lighter]

Just checking on you twopen.

Remember.... the abusers depend on crushing you into submission,

where you won't dare raise your voice or give them any trouble.

Have the police interviewed your sisters yet?

Mo2