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No snow lately, Lighter....I think the last time was about a month ago, but it could've been six weeks or longer or shorter. I'm terrible at recalling dates or time intervals....math! LOL.

But I do recall trying to force my windshield wipers to clear snow and ice my back didn't want to attack. Stooopid, but the nice auto store nearby handled it on the spot. Replaced shredded blade and all's copacetic.

I'm sure we'll get more snow. I love the big ones that bring everything into silence.

hugs
Hops
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: facing the world
« Last post by Hopalong on January 18, 2026, 02:06:28 PM »
It's so odd how I've been preoccupied with my Dad lately. I guess it makes sense because of today's upheaval...my psyche is turning to the safe male figure. And I totally get why your Dad in his old age seemed smaller. Are we all shrinking apace?

I got a startling but welcome letter today from the son of old family friends. Several names and a very tidy account of an interesting life. He (and wife I think) just retired here and he recalled the times his family visited ours, etc. I remembered them as a sort of golden family, blonde and friendly. He retired as a Commander in the Coast Guard. Also made several mentions of various family friends (the men) as "CIA geographers." Huh! I'm so naive that this never quite occurred to me about Dad. He was so self-effacing he did not swashbuckle, and also took the Official Secrets Act verrrrry seriously. So if he was CIA, he never breathed one syllable about it to his pestering, intensely curious daughter.

I'm hoping I can winkle a secret or two out of this friend when we meet.

hugs
Hops
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House
« Last post by lighter on January 18, 2026, 12:01:09 PM »
Nobody has a comment on my being firm, but fair (imo) with the lake contractor, asking to get paid for moving a tree off the driveway.

I'm navigating a different flight path, here.  Leaving a property, empty and at the mercy of an unhappy man, withh opportunity and avility to hinge up any and every system....is normally not something I can tolerate, it consider an option.

A "caretaker" at the cottage, from 25 years ago, hut me up with a bill for over $1500.00....for past services.  I paid it, even though it was more thievery and blackmail on top of old thievery and incompetence.  My BIL was appalled, thought about it, then agreed it had to be done, bc we couldn't affird any (more) sabotage.

The tree removal....well he chunked it and pushed it to the side of the drive....was a $150 ask, on contractor's part.

$150.00 to remove the threat of sabotage.....
but he's stopped being responsive AT ALL to me.  Something's tipped the scale.....the family just down the road, maybe, stepping up.

Contractor said he'd set up appt to discuss projects ....haven't heard a peep in almost a month.

Will say this.....the buck, he's bow hunting, left fresh tracks in the mud.  Hunters pay much more than $150.00 to hunt good private land.  I drag trees off the driveway....bc I need it open to drive on.  He needs the driveway open, to hunt.

So......noticing discomfort, with feelings of vulnerability, coming up today.

I'm working in silence, organizing an armour full of things shoved out of the way.....silver plated serving pieces, battery candles, batteries, cleaning supplies, platters, and i robot parts. 

All need sorting.

 The silence....is part of limiting time spent on electronics.  I'm also eating breakfast, even though I'm not hungry, which makes me sluggish...a little uncomfortable.  Lots of adjustments.

I'm feeling pretty neutral about letting the girls handle their lives, and the pug. Will take a minute to get used to the pug not being attached to me......I think about her when I wake, or hear a dog bark, which sets her to barking.

I notice how relieved I am that all, but upstairs water closet, have easy to clean LVP.  The terra cottage brick pavers have same color grout....drat.  The Downstairs kitchen and a bedroom has ivory grout, I've battled for years.  Lost in a few places....wth?  Looks like rust?

Time to finish one project, and begin another.  I realize I've moved 3 different sets of DR chairs around two tables....I think I should maybe put it back, and back away from that thought.


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I stretch the toe, of every sock, before putting them on. 

I do like a relatively fitted, thin sock. 

Baggy ones.... move around....extra fabric crowds my foot, it seems. Thick, loose and baggy mean I can't wear them with shoes at all.



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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House
« Last post by lighter on January 18, 2026, 11:23:59 AM »
The bees eating supporting outer...band?  Which is 2 boards thick....can only see outer board, which can be replaced pretty easily....I think.  If the second board is damaged badly ......we got big, high off the ground trouble.

Interesting fact... It appears the bees began eating the wood after opaque brown wood stain was applied.  Regular wood sealer didn't appeal to them for 40 years?  And only the high high high corner of the deck, around the grill area.

My stepfather used to add......zinc? To paint.  Was that it?  Much research to do....little bastages.



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I don't remember. There are lots of US companies, but I'm most fond of a pair of hand-knitted ones that I got at a local art/craft coop. They are loose & baggy! Me & tight socks don't get along.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House
« Last post by sKePTiKal on January 18, 2026, 09:15:09 AM »
I fight carpenter bees too. Folksy wisdom sez that they only go after natural/stained wood. So if you PAINT the deck boards (or fascia trim, etc) instead they'll look elsewhere to drill holes. Deck boards are easy to replace; but unless the supports/beams are excessively damaged they should be fine.

My brain hasn't been able to focus on my deck re-do and I don't have any contractor lined up yet. Kinda wanting a couple of screened areas... and (sigh) that's more work, more lumber, more time to completion.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: facing the world
« Last post by lighter on January 17, 2026, 07:15:13 PM »
To answer your question..... I guess my dad wasn't a large man before his stroke. I didn't see him standing, more than a few times, the last 20 years.  He shrank, due to zero activity......and always looking down at him made him appear smaller than maybe he was? 

Unclear, but it's obvious your father was a man to look up to....and that makes me glad. 
Safe, and sane, men aren't that common in my world.  How lucky you are to have that.

Lighter
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What company do you order from?
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: The Lake House
« Last post by lighter on January 17, 2026, 06:59:39 PM »
Big fire going in the living room fireplace.  Contractor left about 4:30pm....the time flew.....felt like 20 minutes only.

Roof leaking in one bedroom....found the problems. Roof vent needs replacing from outside.

Deck has carpenter bee problem....maybe unsafe.  Maybe need to replace outer base ards only.  Will see.

He wants to put in a retaining wall, with boulders from the property, to place wedding arch, tbd.

He can put in electric and plumbing for upstairs and downstairs washer dryer units.  Attic ladder needs repair or replaced.

Outbuilding needs gutter repairs.....water line repairs.....lots of things in that area, frankly.

That's the short list.

Expecting rain.....have to cover a bed and place bucket, just in case.

It's so blustery cold.





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