Recent Posts

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on July 11, 2026, 11:58:40 PM »

Once I get my adulting done.

IF I get around to it I might try to drop into a thrift store and put myself on extreme budget for a crap dress i would only wear once ugh. Needing to impress people with clothes doesn't impress me I am too old, too tired, too bored of it, dressed up too much for work for people who didn't give a rats ass.

The worst thing that could happen is they uninvite me or have a malfunction.

These are not real problems. These thoughts are not real thoughts.

I will sit on it but I need to also not bail at the last moment.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on July 11, 2026, 11:35:49 PM »

Sort of had a plan to go to an event but there is a bit of a dress code which usually I can fake my way through but I ditched my stuff which was in storage so I have not a lot which doesn't seem to usually bother me but now I can't even scrounge my way creatively to correctness.

Contemplating my rudeness and also how it's kind of rude to have a dress code. Also contemplating my priorities and energy level and my focus. My need to focus on more important stuff. Now If I had a fun event I would have a suggestion but it would be - dress how you like, formal, casual, whimsical. It covers everything and it says go for it.

This is dumb that I would contemplate this. I feel like I don't need friends who have dress codes. So I got to struggle with this. Do I want to go. I'd prefer to lean towards creative camp.

Then there are the shoes. It's not enough to find a dress one must also find the shoes.

I almost forgot what my point is.

My point appears to be stress.

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on July 11, 2026, 10:32:22 PM »

I'm tired.

Before I read I am going to type something.

Went for a walk. Thought I saw unusual movement on a plant so I bent down thinking I might see a frog or a snake quivering the stems. I didn't see a frog. There was a fake silver necklace chain. I pulled on it and it came out of the greenery & there was a charm on the necklace. I thought the charm was corroded it didn't look right. I absent mindedly held it in my hand and kept walking. After a few minutes I glanced at it again and it wasn't corroded from the weather as I thought it was it's like my eyes saw it wrong the first glance. The necklace had an initial on it the first letter of my name. It is a cheap girl style sparkly necklace. I put it on for a while and then took it off. It's just weird that I bent down thinking I would find some little tree frog landing from stem to stem. I mean I am in the city. The odds are not that slim that someone is going to find junk. Just thought it was a funky coincidence.

The movement was flower blossoms falling off the plant not a frog.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by sKePTiKal on July 11, 2026, 12:15:37 PM »
Yes, Debbie was here when the power went out Sat night! She left early, because it dawned on me this was going to last awhile and when I set up the generator - I opted for the furnace instead of AC. Imagine my surprise when we finally drove into town at just how close this little tornado was to us! Just over the ridge to the west. We didn't do a lot that weekend; deck was still in progress. Last tweaks will happen next week.

Well, I'm hoping Lighter is living it up on a world tour! I'm sure she'll pop in soon. Board access being spotty might've just convinced her to go do real life stuff for a while.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by Hopalong on July 10, 2026, 10:20:09 PM »
How'd it go with/for Hol? I'm sorry C peed on her 4th of July parade.
And you? Did Debbie make it, even though our posts are a year later now?

We've hadda couple rainstorms, not long enough to deep-water anything, but we're lapping up raindrops like it's manna. (Pup and me.)

I finally caved and have hired two cleaners to come tomorrow and rescue the house from the pit I let it fall into over the last few months. I'm going to take Pup and go visit several friends and stay out of the way. It was beginning to feel odd that I've been to BN's house multiple times and never had him over here...so that'll be a relief. Haven't slept at ALL for two nights this week, so tonight I'm gonna, and will be joyful to come home at the end of the day.

BN and I are visiting that Village member who's on hospice together tomorrow. She's the amazing woman (fully blind now) who built her own sailboat and sailed across the Atlantic on her own years ago. The people we meet....and BN's really enjoying being part of the Board and strategic planning. Plus, we're saying nice things to each other about how meaningful our companionship feels. :) Had to get her permission to bring him along, and she replied it's okay because Pup is going to be getting all her attention anyway. (She's not very interested in men....LOL).

All in all, an encouraging day. Hope that same's true for you and B.

(And where the HECK is Lighter? Official Worry Time?)

hugs
Hops

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by sKePTiKal on July 10, 2026, 07:08:35 AM »
Ah.... we're back!
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Hopalong on July 06, 2026, 10:58:30 AM »
I kept one bust (he was a wild-looking gondolier, I think) until I saw a roach come out of his mouth. Don't make bug-friendly paste! I did, out of wheat flour out of ignorance. But I sure enjoyed him while I had him and so did everyone who saw it.

I mean, maybe an experimental artist somewhere makes marzipan poodles, dunno.
I'd love to do papier mache again. Supplies are nearly free and it's FUN. A good paste can be permanent, too. There are surely modern recipes online? Or cheap glue bugs hate? I gave most of the busts to people, which was fun too.

Creepy story about the daughter speaking for the mother, but I wonder if there was something medical involved? My idea for fresh friendships is less scrutiny and more making appointments to do something and see how it goes. That's how I managed online dating, anyway. Said sincerely in my profile that to me, the pleasure is in meeting a new person and hearing about their life, but I believed that if it's just a one-time try without the Big Click, I still enjoyed a nice cuppa coffee with a new person with a story to tell. I did enjoy meeting all those strangers, even when I'd usually conclude I would decline another date. (When that happened I'd write back gently and just say "I enjoyed meeting you, but realized that for me, there wouldn't be a romantic connection. But thanks for the time you spent with me, and the coffee." Then I'd right away block them, not from hostility but because I'd been clear up front about STOPPING being a fine, no-judgement choice for them or for me. I learned to never let a conversation drag on afterward online, once I'd made that choice.) I observed it helped both people relax, too. It's just as scary for them as for me. (Dunno why I'm droning on about men when that's not your topic, sorry.)

It IS hard to connect when you don't feel comfortable about it. I guess I think the best way is to endure the discomfort for the better goal of overall connection with more humans. I think if you keep it up, it'll pay off. I'm rooting for you, Meh.

hugs,
Hops

PS Amber, thanks for asking. I mostly go immobile in extreme heat, but since I spend too much time immobile anyway, it's not a huge change. As long as I know "this too shall pass" and the power doesn't go out (mercifully it hasn't) so I can sleep at some point with AC, I do fine. On the 4th it was 103 and I still went out to meet BirdNerd and his sister and BIL, which went very pleasantly. Nice people!

While I'm at it, I admit I'm catching feelings for him, and it seems reciprocal. Lots of scary passages ahead, intimacy maybe and having him here after the Great Cleanup. But so far he's been kind, thoughtful, communicative and more. Whew!!!

PPS - A big WOOT WOOT about the deck! Kudos. And I too have wondered if Lighter's okay. She better turn up and catch up, so we'll know. Yoo hoo, Lighter! Hope you haven't melted or been kidnapped by pirates, hon.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by sKePTiKal on July 06, 2026, 06:14:41 AM »
From where I sit, it sounds like you are meeting people. As for the "right people" - well, you'll go through a bunch of non-starters before you run across "a live one". Just the way it is, I think.

I'm pretty tired from the heat & company for the 4th - and in the middle of that we had a power outage, no AC, even with the genny running... B did our grilling, Hol & her company didn't show up until after we ate (3 sheets to the wind; she made a lovely peach, coconut milk, rum cocktail) and they stood at the counter and wolfed down all the hotdogs & burgers... LOL). Power was out from a possible tornado (or straight line winds) at our closest little town; lots of tree down. PotomacEd said power would be back by 11 last night, after 2 days out; came on at 8 and I woke up at 4 this morning to the sound of the genny kicking over & over & over again.... sigh. At least it won't be that hot today.

Contractors should be back today, to finish the railings on the new deck steps. It looks MUCH better and they have kicked butt to get it done in a short amount of time - work looks good too. It's a relief to me, because it was just about ready to go. Main structure was still solid, but all the deck boards needed replacing. This guy doesn't seal or paint... so either we do it, or I wait till next spring when the house gets resealed. That's the last of the upgrade/replacement cycle projects around here to get things shipshape for a decade or two.

Speaking of house projects - anyone heard from Lighter? Or is she off gallivanting around the world? LOL.
Hops - are you hanging in there with this heat? It's wiped me out for sure!
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on July 05, 2026, 09:30:08 PM »
- Went to church & after during the coffee break talked to an adult daughter and her mother. The mother barely talked and the daughter talked as if she were speaking for the mother I found this odd and not sure why they were like this. It was quite extreme as I would say something directly to the mother and the daughter would just answer for her. Oh well. It goes to show that family dynamics are really NOT all THE SAME.

- I put some lemon slices into water and drinking it with a book.
- A friend texted me today. I really only am down to one friend now since I had to ex the other friend.
- Friend wants to meet up next week but I'm not clear on what she wants to do as what she was talking about a couple weeks ago she no longer seems to be interested in that. I sent text back with various options and also if she doesn't want to do anything that is fine too.
- Just wish I knew more people who were motivated to get out FOR REAL.
- People seem to view friendship like a fast-food drive-thru.
- I am not going to be a snot about it but it seems I have to dial back my interest and enthusiasm. ?????
- On the other hand I did get into a political convo last night with a random stranger watching fireworks which wasn't adversarial.
- I need a social life. How do I meet people. Or the right people?

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on July 05, 2026, 03:01:18 AM »
Paper Mache is pretty exciting Hops. Was looking at some just a few days ago dogs and frogs.

I've never made it. Did you keep the busts?
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