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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by lighter on Today at 08:01:11 AM »
Adulting .....
adulting.

I wonder how many ideas, around that, are yours or anyone's....and how many were programmed before one's grown.

Food for thought.

On another note ....your posts about nature, hikes and food are gratifying to read. 

Choosing joy is an important type of adulting, imo. 

Choosing not to engage in conflict is also adulting.....and finding a way to assertively draw boundaries around discussions, and hold them, sans big energy.....is HUGE adulting, ime.

Anyone can learn to do it.

Not everyone does, IME.

Not everyone overwrites their programming, and feels worthy to draw boundaries, and hold them, IME.

I can picture you doing that, Meh.....and camping, and making more social plans, and breathing through life's awkward parts....bc they pass.  Like the weather.

I see you choosing yourself.....when "shoulds" pop up. 

Dismiss, and go back to seeking joy.....expressing it, receiving....expanding it.

Write your own rules.....
maybe....
a little.
Maybe a bunch?

You're grown now.

You can do that.

Lighter













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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Hopalong on May 28, 2026, 06:29:02 PM »
More LIVING, Hippy! (Won't call you Hips, promise. Though if I'm Hops....lol.)
I loved reading this tale of your joyful day in nature. Some people need nitroglycerin, some NEED nature, including you. Bravo bravo bravo.

So so glad you got out in it. And gray days are my favorites. But both, gray then sunny...heaven.

No idea what the grammatical rule is about those compound nouns, but they're good ones:
backside but flip side
offsides
outsides
upside and downside

Maybe the first word is a modifier like an adjective...I only write by instinct and am a pathetic grammarian. I edit correctly (usually) but couldn't recite a rule to save my backside.

hugs
Hops
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 28, 2026, 05:49:53 PM »

Thanks for the well wishes.

Had been in a funk the day before the hike. There were multi-striations of gloom blankets in the sky.

First half of the day we hiked in the rain and then later part of the day sun came out. Was glad we went. We went to one of the more beautiful locations I've ever been had gone there last year. I would like to do a camping trip there to have more time to inspect every leaf on the mountainside. I looked for two types of orchids and I did not find them...must try harder.

She asked what trail I wanted to do ... I said "all of them." She is younger than me but I can outhike her. She can outrun me though. I don't run.

(Hops why is mountainside one word --- and apparently there is no real rule for compound nouns?)

She wanted to bring up politics and I let her but I felt guarded and I said "I just don't want to offend anybody." I try to tell people that I am really not progressive and I am really not conservative because it's the truth of it. I explained to her that I had become somewhat radicalized a while back and I have since disengaged from politics now.

She touched on the big taboos. We are in a blue state and she lives in a very progressive area and she is definitely "a type" when it comes to political stuff. I only bring up mild non-offensive stuff that are factual about the business model of these things that people are making money too from the culture of the issue.

She talks a little too much maybe which is good for hikes in theory to ward off bears and cougars. I'm a content person in nature my mind really just goes into the glad-to-be-here thing and doesn't think constantly. I've got more poverty of thought at times.

We ate nobody got food poisoning. I found a picnic table half in the shade half in the sun. We sat with our feet drying out and watched a rabbit.

I feel I am avoiding adulting. My life feels like crisis stuff but when does it not. Sometimes it doesn't. But if a person can't have friends and hang out with them in nature what is the point of any of it.

It's really nice to be around someone who has functional communication.

Saw another friend as well --- she told me the day after we hung out that she was having some leg pain so she is maybe coming to terms with being overweight but maybe not. She tried weight-loss pills. I suggested she might try weight watchers (the group not the products) as some people have told me they liked it and the support of other people help them.

It's really strange how much in common I have with the hiking friend in spite of the politics stuff. Also I'd like to not be standing next to a giant cliff while talking politics with a progressive. I'm there for the view. It's great having company.
I'm not going to let anybody program my brain with political garbage and I have no interest in deprogramming other people. The politics of nature is the apex predator. Enough rambling.

Now if only I could brainwash her into liking concerts.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 28, 2026, 05:10:04 PM »

Was writing a response then the power cord moved a fraction on my laptop and it shut down. The battery is bloated and dead and won't unscrew out.

So. What was I saying.

To sum it up. It was a very nice day.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by sKePTiKal on May 27, 2026, 09:46:14 AM »
He is. He even admitted that things have been going a LOT better with our docs here - than what he was used to down south. Maybe it's coz there is now a shield maiden advocate... things actually do function differently/better... and maybe it's just a combination of things. Maybe he's putting things into perspective better? I do know the intrusive and annoying tech stuff surrounding healthcare these days he's just letting me deal with. He's looking for physical body fixes - not to have a deep and fulfilling personal relationship with these people.

Guys came out to look at roof today. And of course, it started pouring rain. LOL. They'll be back. I know these guys; they're good. But they'll have to inspect the ridge cap and since it's way off the ground - ain't doing it in the rain. Roofers need a secret weapon; a spiderman - you know?

Hol is going through something emotionally destabilizing. I'm not sure it's JUST her on/off BF C. Maybe it's just the isolation out here and the challenges of landscape, weather, etc. getting to her. But she's not handling socializing real well either - which is not like her. There is a thread of man-hating, Femcel BS running in her head... and because she always resorts to being the biggest, loudest more dominating in the room... is hard for me to get a word in edgewise. She watches way too many psychobabble instagrams & tiktoks and isn't using her excellent brain on what is being promoted. And of course, the algorithm just sends her more of it after she watches one. So I check in with her a lot every day. Maybe she just needs a new model of what women's lives are like... I'm grasping at straws.

Good thing about this tropical rainforest weather is that it's keeping B related to indoor tasks. But he is itching to do more physical stuff soon. I've got some ideas on what we can do, that will further improve our organization and open up our living space a bit more.

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Mindfulness and codependence thread
« Last post by lighter on May 26, 2026, 08:10:41 PM »
The guru stuff bounces off me, Hops.  My introversion works as an auto-reject shield, maybe?

Meh, I like to re read books, using different highlighters each time.  It's interesting to see what jumped out each time.

I'm guessing your grandmother's sister was aware of family dynamics in your life.  Sharing the book with you seems like a warmly extended hand of healing secrets..... I'm a huge fan of sharing information like that.

Lighter
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by lighter on May 26, 2026, 02:31:52 PM »
I'm happy to read surgery went well, Amber. 

Is B relaxing into good possibilities?

Lighter
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Predatory grooming
« Last post by lighter on May 26, 2026, 10:51:28 AM »
Oh....when the mom started hanging up on her Aunt.....bc she didn't appreciate feedback....I was instantly cleared of anxiety.

Can't save people from themselves..... certainly the Court's not there to save any children.

Lighter
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by lighter on May 26, 2026, 10:49:37 AM »
I hope that pasta salad is enjoyed to it's fullest.  I remember a pasta salad making phase....it was yummy!!!

Let us know how things go.

Lighter
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Predatory grooming
« Last post by lighter on May 26, 2026, 10:24:19 AM »
Oh....I have quick turnaround karma, Hops.... shouldn't have had that giggle.  Nope, nope, nope.

 Chlorine gas exposure, at second Airbnb, handled that, toot sweet.

Toot?
Sweet?

Is that the saying?

Lighter
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