Recent Posts

1

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 08:34:37 PM »

I really understand and resonate with the religion frustration, Hippy. I've decided there is an energy force of love (because of my Dad's face as he died). But to me it's not about a deity or a being....much less about anything at all that human language or perception is successful at putting in a book.

I believe any faith (even if it's just faith in life and/or love) that depends on guilt, shame, fear and/or coercion is poisoned. And it's sad. I know loving people who obey and are devoted to institutions that don't love them back.

My big rebellion started with a gut-level feeling that something was wrong with ANY human-written text (which of course all texts are) is "sacred." And then using language to bully or cow or....to be fair.....even inspire....is a sticky wicket. I think if i hadn't majored in linguistics my reverse awakening would have taken years longer.

Still, I do remember plenty of genuine goodness in some believers. Like my Dad's. He never prosyletized, nagged, preached or boasted about his faith, but he did live it. Everywhere, people responded to the genuine warmth and grace of his personality and in how he treated them. All of them, without judgement.

For me, though a few core friendships originated in the UU community, I no longer attend services. Yet another male minister with a personality problem drove me off. But I'm happy in the small groups I occasionally join as, like you, I only keep that connection for some human community.

I'm finding it more in the Village movement these days. No dogma, just people helping more-vulnerable people. And we have frequent gatherings. And I met C there, which has changed my life.

He's sending me daily dispatches and photos from his current adventure. He just climbed the Spanish Steps in Gibraltar. It's interesting, I have zero envy of the adventure because of my back, and need to introvert for a while. But it's pretty cool to have someone close who's in love with everything and driven by curiosity. He cares about ideas too so we'll never get bored with each other.

A poet and a microbiologist. Who knew?

Props to you, Hippy. I'm so impressed with what you're doing. Layer by layer.

hugs
Hops

"I believe any faith (even if it's just faith in life and/or love) that depends on guilt, shame, fear and/or coercion is poisoned. And it's sad. I know loving people who obey and are devoted to institutions that don't love them back." - HOPS

Yes.. I was writing about what you said related to the shame/fear/guilt part. And yes even though the pastor seems quite nice at the church I go to there is still these aspects.

2

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 08:31:12 PM »

So when I was reading the book adult children of toxic parents there was a section about ROLES being assigned to people rigidly. Like the whole dynamic is based on people before forced into roles and sticking to them whatever that means.

And frankly I am looking at church info and really thinking how the role issue is also a point to notice.

The church I have gone to all the ushers/deacons they've always consistently only been males. The males also seem quite puffed up and proud of themselves. I definitely don't want to do that role. It does sort of creep me out though.

Alrighty then enough of my ruminating.

3

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Hopalong on Today at 07:44:14 PM »

Wow. I generally hate, loathe and distrust AI, but sure did like that one!

hugs
Hops

OS -- woo woo

4

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 07:18:43 PM »

I responded to you Hops but it didn't post. Maybe I will try again in a bit. I will have to retype it bwa hahahaha.

5

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 06:27:58 PM »

AI:

Core psychological drivers Hyperactive agency detection and theory of mind: Humans are biased to detect intentional agents (better to false-positive a predator or rival than miss one). This easily extends to invisible agents who “cause” storms, illness, luck, moral order, or death. Once you model other minds, modeling super-minds is a small step. Gods, ancestors, demons, witches, and spirits are high-agency explanations that feel intuitive.

Control and anxiety reduction: Uncontrollable threats (death, disease, injustice, randomness) produce distress. Petitionary prayer, sacrifice, or ritual offers a perceived handle—illusion of control, emotion regulation, and sometimes placebo-like expectancy effects. The act of formulating a narrative, focusing attention, and expressing need can lower arousal even if no external agent responds.

Social and coalitional functions: Shared supernatural beliefs and synchronized rituals (prayer postures, chants, gatherings) signal commitment, build trust, enforce norms, and create large-scale cooperation beyond kin. Group prayer is less about private magic and more about public affiliation.

Meaning, narrative coherence, and coping: Randomness is aversive. Supernatural frameworks supply purpose, moral order, afterlife continuity, and explanatory stories. Worship and prayer rehearse those stories, reinforcing identity and reducing existential threat.

Developmental and cultural learning: Children readily acquire agent-based explanations; cultures amplify the successful packages. Once institutionalized, the practices become self-reinforcing through authority, emotion, community, and occasional apparent “hits” (regression to the mean, selective memory).

Empirical patterns support this: religious cognition tracks intuitive dualism and mind-perception; prayer frequency often rises with stress or uncertainty; and the subjective benefits of prayer frequently overlap with those of meditation, journaling, or social support. None of this requires the entities to exist.

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 06:17:32 PM »

AI:

"Prayer is a form of mental narrative directed at an invisible agent (or agents). It shares core features with other kinds of magical thinking: treating correlation or intention as causal influence over the world, outsourcing agency to non-evident entities, and using ritualized cognition for psychological effects. The difference is mostly cultural packaging, institutional reinforcement, and social acceptability rather than a sharp psychological or evidential distinction. A pentagram, a rosary, a mantra, or silent petition all leverage similar mental operations."
 

7

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by sKePTiKal on Today at 02:01:48 PM »

Most of the time, embroidery is "chust fer purty" as the Amish saying goes. I did find a practical use, when for years, I patched worn out jeans and decorated them. You know, the giant bell bottoms? LOL.

8

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Hopalong on Today at 01:10:23 PM »

I really understand and resonate with the religion frustration, Hippy. I've decided there is an energy force of love (because of my Dad's face as he died). But to me it's not about a deity or a being....much less about anything at all that human language or perception is successful at putting in a book.

I believe any faith (even if it's just faith in life and/or love) that depends on guilt, shame, fear and/or coercion is poisoned. And it's sad. I know loving people who obey and are devoted to institutions that don't love them back.

My big rebellion started with a gut-level feeling that something was wrong with ANY human-written text (which of course all texts are) is "sacred." And then using language to bully or cow or....to be fair.....even inspire....is a sticky wicket. I think if i hadn't majored in linguistics my reverse awakening would have taken years longer.

Still, I do remember plenty of genuine goodness in some believers. Like my Dad's. He never prosyletized, nagged, preached or boasted about his faith, but he did live it. Everywhere, people responded to the genuine warmth and grace of his personality and in how he treated them. All of them, without judgement.

For me, though a few core friendships originated in the UU community, I no longer attend services. Yet another male minister with a personality problem drove me off. But I'm happy in the small groups I occasionally join as, like you, I only keep that connection for some human community.

I'm finding it more in the Village movement these days. No dogma, just people helping more-vulnerable people. And we have frequent gatherings. And I met C there, which has changed my life.

He's sending me daily dispatches and photos from his current adventure. He just climbed the Spanish Steps in Gibraltar. It's interesting, I have zero envy of the adventure because of my back, and need to introvert for a while. But it's pretty cool to have someone close who's in love with everything and driven by curiosity. He cares about ideas too so we'll never get bored with each other.

A poet and a microbiologist. Who knew?

Props to you, Hippy. I'm so impressed with what you're doing. Layer by layer.

hugs
Hops

9

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 11:58:32 AM »

Fingers crossed this posts, sans delay, this time.

Embroidery is easy - I started when I was 5 or 6. At first, you'll notice your stitches aren't as clean/regular as the examples you've seen. You get there, by practice - and learning the art of patient, meditative attention. These days, I don't find that kind of "attention" relaxing (like with needlepoint; don't do much of that either); it's more of a challenge and I have to take a lot of breaks.

Agreed it might not be a new hobby for me other than this little kit I got. Even though I see images of embroidery like on influencer's accounts I really don't see it much in practical use. If you are good with the sewing machine which it sounds like you are then that is enough.

I did talk to a guy who showed me he got this patch which was kind of ho-hum but he sewed it onto his jacket and then on top of that he embroidered on the patch and for what it was it looked good but at the same time eh is it a silly trinket thing. To each his own.

Yesterday I looked at some sculpture and painted art. Even if I am not doing it I feel I get something from looking at it.

10

Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again

« Last post by Dirty Hippy on Today at 11:54:48 AM »

Didn't go to church on Sunday and it felt freeing. Funny how something that started out somewhat positive turns into an expectation, demand, command, obligation.

So I journaled outloud and this was the fact of it: I don’t have resources to prop up a geriatric church that’s looking for younger people to carry the torch, especially when I'm not a married HOUSEwife with money. Supporting with free labor or cash isn’t my job right now. Full frontal clarity.

And I will also say the praying it's just Christians doing magic it's no different. Praying to an invisible deity with hope they will intercede on my life is the epitome of retardedness. If there were deities they can intercede if they want on their own AND it's quite narcissistic for a deity to demand worship and praise all the time.

Really if the christian god were a mortal human in flesh that person would be a narcissist cult leader.
- I am all powerful I give and take away
- I know everything
- I am perfect and the only perfect
- I have the power to punish you
- I can control hurricanes and make them miss your house if you pray hard enough
- Even your daily bread is from me, you might plant it, water it, nurture the grain, harvest it, mill it, yeast it, time it, ... you might do every fucking piece of the LABOR but I am the narcissist god that owns your food and owns you.
- Keep giving me money. I'm all powerful but I can't make an underground well below the church made of liquid diamonds.
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I guess I just had to get that out.

I think it's healthy to be self-centered within context.

The imaginary daddy in the sky thing is just not for me. There I said it. Am I fanatically against Christians no I am not. They can do what they want I do wish they would stop the conversion of vulnerable people. The church I have been attending has so missionary nurse thing in Africa... yes giving people healthcare is a benefit and it's positive.. but doing that in order to convert people is actually quite gross - hey you're sick and poor? The medicines might heal you but the invisible daddy in the sky owns you. Owns you AKA "created you"

Wow. I seem to have had a deep teenage style rant inside of me who knew.
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So I am an atheist always have been end of story. I'm just using the church for my social sanity. Feels wrong then again the church burned all those women at the stake lol so why not go and have a cookie and coffee when I feel like. Or just avoid it altogether. I will say that having a gross older male at the church start to give me unwanted attention is a big part of the problem I am having with this church.

MY solution - If I want to - I can go to the services and avoid the coffee visit afterwards altogether.

And the truth is I do like some of the women at the church I do. But maybe they wouldn't like me if they thought I was a religious dabbler or worse.

Socializing is really hard.
- proximity
- social skills
- resources
- ideology (some groups are not based on this)
- context match and fit

I really want to join a hiking group but I don't have a car. Well at least I hear myself. Myself says just get together with active people doing activities.