Recent Posts

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10
1
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Health Updates
« Last post by sKePTiKal on May 16, 2026, 04:45:47 PM »
Unless falling is a regular thing that happens, I don't think it's anything to connect with age, Hops. Being sedentary can be more than a lack of strength though. Balance, flexibility are things that aren't getting used as well. (This comes from a total klutz who KNOWS how to move well - and doesn't always practice it!) I run into doors and walls. Yes, for real.

Maybe find a leafy park to gently walk with bird nerd for a bit - doesn't have to be a 10 mile hike! Walking is good exercise - and probably gentler (coz you're in control of pace) than cardiac rehab.
2
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Health Updates
« Last post by Hopalong on May 16, 2026, 12:16:01 PM »
Bit short of breath today. Thinking it's allergens but still always hate the sensation. For some reason, I'm pondering age and vulnerability a lot. I'll be starting again at the little cardiac rehab gym soon. Not looking forward to it but believe if I don't stop this sedentary cycle I'll die. When I start walking, the weakness hits. Immobility is a stupid, stupid way to manage anxiety, imo. And I'm probably having that because of getting to know another male and primarily, having let my house go completely squalid. It's not just shame, but fear. Both.

The back pain on bending is the primary physical cause, as doing dishes, food prep, etc send me into back spasms. I'm so weary of it and it's worsening. Actually, something else might be the primary cause: ADD. Once I started the cycle when my dear cleaner has been unavailable for months, it's been like falling. I stopped taking care of this, then stopped taking care of that, etc etc etc. It's been like watching a very slow, time-lapse mudslide that's now engulfed my kitchen, bath and bedroom. I wander around like a wraith with blinders on. I SEE the mess and detour around it back to the womb: on bed with laptop.

The extension isn't too bad, despite mounds of laundry that need folding and multiple more loads to go. Pulling wet laundry out and transferring it to dryer...ow.

I do know what to do. I don't know WHY I haven't done it.

Thanks for listening to an extended, really absurd WHINE. I am so lucky to live here and to be alive. Something's just not been connecting lately and I think it scares me.

There've been highs and lows this spring. Highs especially with the old family friends, a nervous bit with Birdnerd, lows about...falling, home mess, and Poet. Can I blame her for my recent decline? LOL. J/k, I'm no longer grieving but relieved.

hugs
Hops
3
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Hopalong on May 16, 2026, 11:57:48 AM »
That's interesting.

I sure wish stellar, outstanding, Scanda-quality public education for every single zip code was priority one.

Gotta nice afternoon ahead:
--visit to tax place to sign and pay for the extension (not fun but good to finish)
--cafe beer meet with Birdnerd
--possible meet with dogsitter pal

hugs
Hops
4
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 15, 2026, 03:30:00 PM »

Dirty Hippy / Hippie

The way I see it if someone is white trash it's pure dysfunction.

If somebody is a dirty hippie they are dysfunctional but still having a life in spite. Spiteful living.
5
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 13, 2026, 06:14:03 PM »

I've got these montelukast pills I am reading they cost under 10.00 to make, market, distribute but the pharmacy marks it as 170.00 for these tiny pills that barely do anything. It's for allergies.

I don't pay 170.00 but I think it's kinda scammy that "list price" can even exist.
6
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Health Updates
« Last post by Hopalong on May 13, 2026, 02:59:20 PM »
Pup got some kind of bird bone outside and I heard him crunching in the gap between bed and wall. I was trying to reach the bone splinters to get them away from him and my body decided to fall gracefully over the side of the mattress and land me on my head. OW.

I drove to the ER, not worried but just obeying Dr Google, got a CT brain scan (I'm okay, no bleed) and all is well. Just another mortality reminder.

It'll make for a fun addition to the Organ Recitals, though. Milking it for all it's worth, as usual.

hugs
Hops
7
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Hopalong on May 13, 2026, 02:46:17 PM »
AWESOME!
I remember when you used to talk about nature and its beauty often...so glad you got out in it again. SO healing.

Ditto "hanging with a friend." Hoomins need to rub shoulders with hoomins. I think anxious thinking gets mitigated when social contacts are built into life. Doesn't have to be daily, but regularly.

Yay, you, Hippie!

hugs
Hops
8
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 12, 2026, 09:02:20 PM »

Went hiking with new friend... it was really nice. Was worth all the effort. Felt like a very long day.
9
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 12, 2026, 10:43:17 AM »

-- Waking up here

-- I am going to meet a friend and I am feeling stressed about it -- going to meet them and then they are going to drive -- control freak part of me I guess is stressing about stuff like -- what if something happens -- what if I get stranded -- I hope I am not turning into a paranoid narcissist --

-- I think it's going to be a hot day here

-- I don't need to over plan this day but my brain wants to overplan it.

-- I should just take a shower -- water load before I leave so that I am pre hydrated and just give up on the rest

-- I feel tired I think I didn't sleep well

I feel I should not be hanging out with a friend but I've found that I am not being particularly productive recently.

If I say to myself go sit in cafe and work on stuff -- I sit there kinda space out and don't work on stuff.

clearly I need to do something different because my soul is registering my current attempts at being productive as fruitless --- Do A -- Get B - Failure and bad experience

Do C -- and get D mystery outcome idk

Anyhow I do think the therapist has kind of helped me see that I've got a lot of layers of stress "trauma" piling on like a layer cake. -- a series of just too many things not going well but then of course I feel like it's a weakness in me which causes stuff to go very badly anyhow I need to go into departure mode.
10
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on May 12, 2026, 10:34:29 AM »

And......in 100 years, what will it matter?


Right Lighter
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10