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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by sKePTiKal on Today at 09:36:04 AM »
There has been enough "seepage" - not a complete breach - to scare all the silage out of me. I lit up my contact at the bank, while it was all "ongoing" over the phone. Usually I just hang up on those fools... but I let him talk enough, to find out he HAD access to my username for the bank's web access (no, I refuse to use apps just for this exact reason).

So, I've already put additional security in place; it was rather urgent. I'm continuing to closely monitor.

There are few more things I'm still considering I will maybe do... but it does make life more complicated.

The main issue emotionally, is that one ASSUMES all these businesses, institutions at least make the attempt to protect people's online ID, personal info. And it's a huge wake up call to me, that I can't trust them. The betrayal feels like I'm on fire. And it's just salt in the wound, to get the "I told ya so" from Hol. She bought C's mantra about how bad all this tech is, hook line & sinker. But she doesn't see that he is part of the problem - developing software with AI agents.

There are much more interesting things, to me, to spend my time/thought processes on than tech. And the old resentment of it "ruling my life" pops up again too. Add that on top of the business and normal life drama... and that kind of overwhelm sends me into tailspins of wanting to escape ALL this crap.

But it is starting to balance out. A little.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by Hopalong on August 25, 2026, 10:02:33 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear that. Sounds terrifying.

I'm unclear as to whether you've undergone a data breach, or have been triggered into fearing one?

Whatever happened, I hope it's minor and you can pull up the drawbridge.

hugs
Hops
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Hopalong on August 25, 2026, 10:00:00 PM »
Go for it!
I think asexuality is a welcome rest for some folks.

You can turn on again at some point, or not bother and be happy anyway.

hugs
Hops
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by sKePTiKal on August 24, 2026, 07:47:20 AM »
Was that an AI conversation, Hippie?
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on August 23, 2026, 11:19:57 PM »
is this psychopathic thinking: "I'm ugly, stupid, poor and hence I do not want to have some pathetic brats that are losers like me" ---- "I am athletic, good looking rich and so it might be worth my time to breed" ---- ??? explain this
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Definition mismatch: Not psychopathy. True psychopathy involves a lack of empathy, manipulation, and disregard for the rights of others. This is an example of raw pessimism, low self-esteem contrasted with narcissism, and hyper-utilitarian reasoning applied to human reproduction.

First statement mechanism: Driven by severe internalized self-loathing, depression, and a protective mechanism (anti-natalism or fatalism) to prevent passing perceived suffering or genetic flaws to offspring.

Second statement mechanism: Driven by eugenicist logic, shallow materialism, and conditional self-worth where reproduction is viewed purely as a status symbol or a narcissistic vanity project rather than raising an independent human being.

Core psychological drivers: Both extremes reduce human value to transactional metrics (wealth, looks, capability) rather than intrinsic worth.
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poor people are not independent they do not own compounding wealth --- the are dependent on systems that dehumanize them ------- second question what causes a person to view everything as transactional and if they see the world this way are they in some way a slave?
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Causes of a transactional worldview:

Trauma and deprivation: Growing up in environments where survival depended strictly on scarce resources, conditional affection, or transactional safety.

Systemic conditioning: Living in hyper-capitalist systems that commodify relationships, labor, and personal worth.

Psychological defense mechanisms: Using transactional logic (cost-benefit analysis) to protect oneself from emotional vulnerability, rejection, or exploitation.

Are they a slave?

Yes, conceptually and psychologically. By reducing all human interaction and self-worth to utility, transactions, and metrics, they enslave themselves to external validation, fear of loss, and the very materialistic systems they might despise. True autonomy requires valuing things that have no price tag.
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everything has a price tag
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The economic reality: In a market-driven society, physical survival, resources, labor, and access to goods are strictly commodified, meaning nearly everything material carries a literal price tag.

The psychological trap: Believing that intangible things—such as intrinsic human worth, authentic love, loyalty, morality, or existential meaning—have a price tag reduces human existence entirely to a market exchange.

The consequence: Viewing non-material realities as commodities guarantees that relationships remain conditional and perpetual dissatisfaction persists, because true psychological freedom requires recognizing domains that cannot be bought or sold.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on August 23, 2026, 03:32:56 PM »

So I have the Obama care thing and I used it to try physical therapy because why not in context of me not having insurance before. One of my jerk coworkers immediately quit working her PART TIME job the same day she confirmed her pregnancy lol so she could get free medical care while her husband runs his business.

The physical therapist I saw was kinda good maybe kinda half-assed but she sure liked to talk about sex a lot and I didn't bring that topic up. Is it narcissistic of me to want to complain about it. I complain a lot I really do. But she was telling me about her other patients sexual problems and with no identifying info I understand it's not technically a lapse of privacy but it still seemed weird to me.

She brought up perimenopause herself - I did not. I was glad she mentioned it actually because hormones do impact women's whole freaking body apparently even their eyes.

The thing is aging out of the female vag-rat race is kinda nice.

I'd like the world to be neutered for a while. Don't want to hear about it. Don't want to think about it.

I wish people would copulate in private. In a way due to cultural "openness" people are kinda projecting humping in some kinda social context.

So now I am wondering why the PT humped a really fat ex husband lol. How disgusting. Am I meant to be impressed with her. It's her fault that she forced TMI into a medical appointment. Not only that but she seemed reactive to people's opinions about obese-ness but I didn't bring it up.

Apparently it's okay for her to make my appointment about other people's sex lives and hers. But it's not okay for me to  tell her how barfy it is to think of her humping her bag-of-fat ex husband. And she finally left him because he was no longer financially viable for her (truth will set us free from what?)

Sex is some kinda aesthetic goal
Sex is some kind of social function
Sex it's something to sell
Sex it's something to project
Sex it's something that makes people not better than every other mammal like rats and cats and dogs and bats

I want to be sexless for a while and if humans wanna brag about their hippopotamus sex lives during my expensive medical appointment which state tax payers are funding oh well I guess.

In a bad mood. I might go sit under a tree for a while not read a book. Or do I read a book.
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Gonna pack my bag and go out I guess.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by sKePTiKal on August 23, 2026, 10:26:04 AM »
It most certainly is life-threatening Hops.

Remember, I'm not taking SS. The amount I would receive is so low I couldn't survive on it. Not even pretend to. B, Hol and I would essentially be homeless if my business/financial accounts are breached and drained. That is income I need just to pay taxes for the business. Property taxes.

We don't live extravagantly; little travel, no fancy vehicles or even fancy interior design. We eat well, and are getting ready to stock the freezers with beef for the winter. We pay people to do needed maintenance, repair, or replace work here - but those projects are winding down.

Any hacker/scammer that knows any piece of my logins - can find the other piece and remove MY access to my online accounts and I don't want to have to learn how many ways I need to prove my identity to the bank to get it BACK.

It's so bad out in the cyberuniverse, that even the IRS and one of the state tax departments wouldn't even let me FILE my taxes, until I'd verfied ID with them - and that was a few years back. (And my suspicious mind wonders how many people had access to that info and also had malicious intent; there have been plenty convicted who worked for various levels of gov't).

I wish I could put this down to paranoia and being influenced by paranoid people, but that's no longer possible.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Hopalong on August 22, 2026, 02:51:04 PM »
Dang, girl, what was the book's title?
This could be big! Maybe we all need to read it! j/k

And what does the art poster look like?

How is your coffee?

Have you had a collapse-nap?

Love your microsteps, hope they keep adding up.

hugs
Hops

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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by Dirty Hippy on August 22, 2026, 10:51:45 AM »

Took a couple busses WAY out of my way. It was good and bad. And I am too tired to explain. I think I stood for a long time yesterday so my feet are tired. I don't know. It's everything. Haven't been able to open up the board for a few days it spins when I click on the tabs. So okay maybe I will just plan microsteps this morning. For now I might just drink my coffee.

I was given a free art poster by the curator of an estate. It's not fancy but I also have a free frame from a yard sale so I guess for the heck of it I will try to put it together. That is a morning project why not.

Need a shower there were plumbing issues.
Been thinking of calling therapist and making appt with her idk.
Yesterday I saw two people reading the same obscure book at different locations. Interesting.
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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Farm Journal - 2026
« Last post by Hopalong on August 21, 2026, 09:18:03 PM »
WOTTTT?

Is "business or financial stuff" privacy, if breached, life threatening?

WHERE DO I SEND MY PEA SHOOTER?

I don't understand but am ready to.

Oh poop. So many people are vibrating until their eyebrows shift.
You are one of the SMARTEST people I know with their finger on the zeitgeist.

hugs
Hops
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