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Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board / Re: Anything again
« Last post by sKePTiKal on Today at 07:58:52 AM »Those social messages (be happy, look like a barbie doll, be independent) are a kind of peer-pressure to conform to that arbitrary "standard" of the moment. Like all fashion - it changes. For me, it was the "be happy" message that was the most dangerous. Actual human beings simply aren't happy 24/7/365 with no anxiety or concerns unless they're completely delusional and disconnected from reality.
Hops & I can go on about this at length, with many many more examples. My D, Hol, is working on her own list because it's in her nature to be fiercely independent, very intense (which scares a lot of people - male & female alike), and yet she's very kind, caring, and a compulsive problemsolver. She refuses to play the character that society tries to push onto her - because it's NOT who/what she is. And she simply won't pretend. This can create additional problems in her life - but she accepts that.
I stopped trying to find/chase happiness. And I let it find me. I still did all the same things, still enjoyed some little things... but one day I wasn't doing anything particular and just realized I was happy! It was a strange feeling, so I just sat with it... and in a few minutes it faded... just like all emotions do (some more persistant than others). And these days, it comes & goes as it will - just like frustration, anger, resentments, silliness, and just good old coziness. May the fairy of happiness come visit you!
Hops & I can go on about this at length, with many many more examples. My D, Hol, is working on her own list because it's in her nature to be fiercely independent, very intense (which scares a lot of people - male & female alike), and yet she's very kind, caring, and a compulsive problemsolver. She refuses to play the character that society tries to push onto her - because it's NOT who/what she is. And she simply won't pretend. This can create additional problems in her life - but she accepts that.
I stopped trying to find/chase happiness. And I let it find me. I still did all the same things, still enjoyed some little things... but one day I wasn't doing anything particular and just realized I was happy! It was a strange feeling, so I just sat with it... and in a few minutes it faded... just like all emotions do (some more persistant than others). And these days, it comes & goes as it will - just like frustration, anger, resentments, silliness, and just good old coziness. May the fairy of happiness come visit you!
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