Yesterday, my Moss friend and I went to an amazing moss garden. It has 4 running streams, lined in rock, moss and plants.....lots of Trillium and ferns, etc.
The neighbor/guy , cultivating it beautifully, has a stone water feature with a wildlife camera....bears, flying squirrel, fox, coyote and various other visitors are recorded and on neighborhood website. He used to be a wildlife photographer. It was too perfect a day, windy and not cool ...not warm. The hurricane destruction was the only sad thing.....lots of trees down...trees leaning on trees over the road.... precariously perched.
We went to antique and consignment/art galleries next. Chatted at a cafe, and MIL never crossed my mind, until I was reminded on this thread.
It reminds me of the neighbors.....the feelings, conflicted and frustrated, bounce around, banging and clanging, demanding attention.
I tend to them.
They dissipate..... eventually diminish.
I guess the trick is.....establishing a base line of chill and calm, after doing what I can do, if I choose to spend that time.
And.... I'm not choosing, mostly. Deciding not to pull documents....deciding to let stupid Yelly Guy manufactured chaos GO.... unchallenged....
creates the feeling of....
choice, yes, but also of weightlessness and release, to rise above and observe, sans any judgement, which is....
not unfamiliar.
It's just more solid and drops into place....more efficiently, bc I've worked toward, and on that, with scattered understanding, and more and less mindful purpose, as reason permitted.
There's more processing, less flapping about.....less time before math calculations add up.....
Worry, about something I have no control over = suffering. Reactivity is just a default. I can discern, address and alter that default, which is quite the trick when reactivity is involved, IME.
I'm curious what's up here, above the clouds, where clarity and joy are available.
Curious, if I can noticably strengthen these pathways, daily, into new default settings, and....
are these, pathways, second half of lifer (SHOL) pathways?
It feels like they absolutely are....and I felt that way when the lightness and shifting popped up.
Just noticing the fruits and flowers of mindfulness. 🌷🌻🪷
Lighter
P.S. There have been bolts of clarity, calm and knowing, I've experienced while under duress....that surprised me.....similar to the clarity time limits create in my chemistry. Pure, unquestioned truth and focus ON THAT TRUTH, sans doubt or anyone's ability to gaslight me into confusion, yup yup yup.
Curious.
