N.

[Meh]

If you'd like more information, or insights, on my perspectives on healing....just ask.

Lighter

Thanks.

[Meh]

I complain a lot internally some externally.

Was frustrated today with how difficult it is for me to set up a therapy appointment. I have junk insurance. Being that I have junk insurance and probably doesn't pay well there are limited locations I can use it so I don't feel I am making a choice really it's more like an institutional conveyor belt but maybe I am fixating on dumb stuff. Some of my frustration is legit and some of it seems stupid petty insane.

Came across Dr. Jeffrey Young Angry Child Mode concept. I don't do a lot of tantrum type things but my brain does ruminate and it also gives up on stuff sometimes when I get too frustrated.

Anyhow I might come back to this Angry Child Mode thing again and reflect on it.

Sadly I could reflect on my life forever and I don't think my quality of life is going to improve much.

[Meh]

Complaining and ruminating.


??? The Coping Mechanism: You develop a "Perpetual Courtroom" in your mind. You ruminate and complain to "prove" your case to an imaginary judge because, as a child, nobody ever stood up for you and said, "This is wrong." * You aren't "just complaining"; you are testifying to your own sanity. ???

Complaining why do it. It's based on stress and anger?